Hi I'm new with panic attacks in cars

[louised]

Hello everyone, I am so relieved to have found this site. I'm 40 years old, married, lovely husband, lovely children, job I like, generally nice life but it's being ruined by panic attacks.

They started a few weeks ago after going through a fairly stressful couple of months including the death of a friend I loved very much. The worst thing is I always get them in cars, mainly when I'm driving, and always somewhere where i can't stop the car or pull over (ie: on a motorway when I have to move off crawler lane to let in incoming traffic, dual carriageway in a stream of traffic, on a bridge, narrow lane etc) I'm already avoiding main roads, bridges etc when driving but can't stop altogether because we live right out in the country and I have elderly parents who need a lot of support. I am really worried I'm going to cause a major accident because the attacks are so frightening and my legs shake so much it's hard to control the pedals and usually I feel awful for at least an hour after the main wave of the attack has passed.

Has anyone else been through this and found a way to stop it? I would be so grateful for any advice, am feeling desperate. Thank you so much.

[marie1974]

hiya and welcome to nmp, im sure you will find some great advice and support from people here, also make new friends too.

ps im sorry about your friend, thats very sad news and sometimes thnigs like this will set off panic and anxiety, mayb can u speak to a doctor or counsellor, i had cbt counselling for 5 months for anxiety and other stuff and it really helped me. hugs xxx

[hevsw]

Hi Louise d, i understand really what you are going through- i lost my nerve last year with driving- i was driving on the motorway and felt the panic rise- i managed to get off and luckily i was able to avoid motorways. I was still able to drive on A roads, so i would find ways of getting to places on A roads, instead of motorways, however then i got a major panic attack on an A road and that was it- i am now so scared- not so much of driving per se but of crashing- around the village i am fine- i just cant stand open roads. I am quite ashamed of this and most of my friends have no idea- but, although all the advice is to not avoid things, i am afraid i am avoiding driving because i dont feel safe- i have had some cbt- and i think this may help but i didnt take to the counsellor, we didnt really connect. The general principle is good- but it means exposure to what you are scared of- with driving it is really hard because if you feel scared you panic and then you fear you are going to crash and then you feel more scared- there isnt a safe, gentle introduction back into driving is there?
i hope you find away of managing this because it is very distressing, especially when it is something that we rely on so much. If you want to reply to me that would be great- either on here or pm me.
take care
love Heather

[belle]

Hi and welcome :)

x

[DaveThe Snapper]

Hello Louise. This is very familiar to me! I have all my panic attacks when driving. I've not had a bad experience when driving that I can blame- my last attack was on the A303 - a claustrophobic road with narrow lanes and no central reservation. I felt very frightened all of a sudden and had a strange 'floating' feeling which I have had before when on a motorway. I had to pull in and my wife took over the wheel. I have only recently been able to start driving on motorways after an attack on the M5. I thought I was over it but this recent experience has knocked me back severely. I have learned a lot about anxiety in the past few years. When this feeling descends I now know I'm not ill, I'm not going to faint, I'm not going to die but it's still VERY VERY unpleasant, coupled with this 'unworldly' feeling that comes with anxiety.

[jeckett]

Hi Louise, I've never had panic attacks in cars but I have had them in places like lifts so I know how u must feel. I can't really think of anyting to help you get round that except maybe if you try driving (when u can) at times when there's less people on the roads so you dont have to worry about interfering as much with other road users as much, say not at peak times or school times. Then u can maybe drive slower and feel safer and hopefully less stressed about being in your situation. Hope that helps. Good luck.

John

[louised]

Thank you all so much for your kind words, honestly it's so nice to be able to talk about it with people who understand. It's such a relief because my family (lovely as they are) think I'm exaggerating.

Heather thank you for telling me what happened to you, your situation sounds almost the same as mine, and I completely understand how you're feeling. It's such a vicious circle because as you said you can't face your fears if you really are risking having an accident. And thank you too Dave. I am really, honestly sorry that other people are going through the same thing but I thought it was just me. I'm going such strange routes to get places now because there are so many roads I have to avoid and if I do have to drive anywhere I start worrying about it ages in advance.

I was thinking about trying CBT.

But honestly I feel better just for you all being so kind, thank you!

Louise xxx

ps: Sorry but I don't know what a pm is?

[Sleepless999]

Hi Louised - I have exactly the same thing with driving and panic attacks. I have to go on a very loney road to work and I start worrying about it before I even get behind the wheel! I'm sure it happens because we feel "trapped," and the fact that we cannot get out of the car and be with someone who will calm us down, makes us start our own panic attacks! I do my own cognetive therapy to distract myself - I put the air con. on freezing, whatever the weather which takes my breath away, and I sing as loudly as I can to a CD - there are places that I consider "safe" en route, like shops, friends houses etc. and I don't look to my final destination, I just get from safe place to safe place and before I know it, I'm there! When I'm really bad (as I was this Tuesday) I get a friend to follow me home, and she knows that if I put my hazards on, I'm getting panicky and the plan is that we both stop and I can be with a friend immediately. It worked, and because I could see her in my mirror I was absolutely fine - it IS all in the mind, but hard to deal with at the time. I was very proud of myself afterwards!:whistles: Me, distracting myself!

[hevsw]

Hi Louise- sorry- i should have said pm= private message( where people perhaps post thing that are more personal or where they dont always want others to see-) it is more like emailing each other.
love Heatherxx

[weeble40]

Hi and a big welcome to NMP its great to have you here, hope to see you in chat sometime,

Take care

Emma xxx

[Patty]

Hi Louised,:)

:welcome: to NMP. It's great that you've joined. There is so much information & help here.

I can so relate to the way that you describe having panic attacks when driving. I also get them when I'm somewhere that I can't pull over/escape from. Then the avoidance where some roads feel safer than others - taking detours. For some reason I feel safer on quiet country roads rather than main roads or motorways.

Nicola's story on the left under the 'Main Menu' is very helpful. I think that the only way to overcome this fear is to gradually put yourself in the situations where you take the panic attacks & feel the anxiety. The more often you can do this the better.

Best wishes xx :bighug1:

[pooh]

Hi there and welcome along to NMP

Pooh x