Deleting my Threads

[Oceanblue]

Im sorry I keep deleting my threads. Somebody keeps telling me not to write my worries here and not to tell others my inner feelings.

Last night I deleted a thread of mine not long after I wrote it, sorry I did that but I just wanted to thank those three people who did reply and take their time in writing to me. I have thought about what you've all said and I appreciate your thoughts.

Thanks, take care x

[marie1974]

hi katie, u should have kept that up matey, sometimes writing it all down is a good thing and u get different opinions etc.

hugs to u xxxxxxxx

[jodie]

hiya katie

i know tetley has asked who it is that has told you to delete your thread but rather than do it on the forum maybe tell her in pm,saves it getting into another row,and maybe pm the person who told you to do this to !

jodie x

[Wolfie]

If someone is telling you to not post how you're feeling, etc, then that's not very nice of them is it? Maybe you should report them? Don't worry over people. You're allowed to say how you're feeling, never ever let other people try to stop you from doing that. It's your right as a human being hun. Hope things get sorted soon xxxx

[london]

who told you this

[samc100]

Katie - is it someone on here on someone at home telling you not to post? Is this why you left ( but obviously you have returned which is lovely) ?

If it is someone on here tell them where to go. Place is big enough for all of us.

If it is someone at home you could always ask the Admin lot to allow you another name so the person at home wouldn't know it was you (though you'd have to post in the dead of night with a torch strapped to your head!)

Hope you ok honey xxxx

[Oceanblue]

I'm sorry for any confusion. It isn't somebody from the Site, just so that you all know.

Thanks to all those that have written out of concern here and in pm, I just don't know how to handle things anymore, what to think or feel, i'm scared of making mistakes because I always seem to mess up, and I hate myself for that.

I know I must sound full of self pity right now, but i'm in a dark place, all I know is that I'm feeling so confused, I don't know where to turn.

I'll be ok, so please don't worry, I just need to get myself back on track somehow.
Thanks so much for listening and for the support, hoping you're all well xxx

[bottleblond]

Katie

I don't think you are full of self pity,I think you have some genuine problems going on at the moment. :flowers:


I really hope thinks start to improve for you soon.

Take care
Lisa
xxx

[samc100]

Oh Katie76... if there is anything at all we can do, please let us know. I do hope you are taking good care of yourself. And like Lisa says you don't sound full of self-pity, you sound full of distress and upset. I hope things improve for you.

But let us know if we can help you...

[marie1974]

hi katie, i really hope you manage to feel better soon, wot ever your problems or issues are just make sure u do wot u got to do and not wot other people want, otherwise you will regret it and u wont b happy.

everyone is here to support you, if u need to talk then we will listen, wot ever all the things troubling you are they can b sorted out matey, stay strong.xxxx

[Oceanblue]

Hi,

I just wanted to say thanks for your care, it means so much to me.

I know that I've always been somebody that finds it hard to talk about my own problems, and most times, (especially when I joined the site) I may have seemed a bit distant. The only reason being was because what went on previously to joining NMP. It's weird because i'm not like that at all, infact the total opposite.

Most things i'm very open to, only I guess I've been emotionally scarred for years in many ways and I truly think that I've covered those feelings up for the past 3years,..Why ? I guess it's because I don't want to fall down again, mostly because of my children. They mean the world to me,.. well more to the point, they are my world !

I used to always try and help others,..for the majority of my life,.. some unfortunately I couldn't, they've gone now, they've died (taken it themselves). Part of my probs,.. accepting what I couldn't do, and was to keep them here.

I realise these things are in the past,... but doesn't past things make us how we are now ? I believe they do. And also, if we haven't had a chance to talk about those things, then where would we be in this world ? Lost...? I think so.

And thats just how I feel right now.

I know that many times my paranoia gets the better of me, hell knows why? Whether it's to do with my illness or what !?

All I know is that I've been pretty mixed up for years, but I want to make a change. Funny thing is,... I thought I had, and that I was ok. Jeeezzz,.. what a joke, who was I trying to fool ? Most of all I tried to fool myself, i've only hurt myself more for doing that,.. do you think that's true ? I'm just trying to survive the traumas, pastimes,.. I have no other way.

I'm so sorry,.. sorry for messing things up on Site here and sometimes going a bit crazy or whatever.

I've just been talking to London/NMP Member here on the phone. Hope you don't mind me mentioning you. But you've been such a good listener and I appreciate you being there for me for the past weeks. You know that I'm always here for you too. Please remember that xxx My little girl's hassling me for another party ! lol,.. Do you fancy coming round to DJ this time ? lol. Luv ya mate xx

Thanks again everyone. I'll try and start new,.. the new-real Katie76 lol instead of the one thinking,.. yeh everythings ok :) !

(I do love to laugh, don't get me wrong, more so than other times, people will tell you.. hehe :). Those dark times I know, erm well,.. I can be as miserable as sin lol,....(hmmm time of the month:ninja:, did someone mention ?... I couldn't find the devil icon :shrug: ). But yep,.. mostly I think,.. well so i've been told :blush: .

But,.. you know... I hope you can understand what i'm saying.

I think this sites brill and I want to stay if it's ok with you guys.

Love to you all xxx:flowers: Take good care.

[lorac]

I understand what you are saying katie, sometimes this anxiety and depressed makes us a different person and I for one really do understand that. Sometimes its like I turn into someone I don't really know and like and other times I can be myself again.

Glad you decided to stay Katie and I am sure people on here will understand what you are saying.

Carol

[marie1974]

its good to talk hun and it really helps, if u need support then we all here xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[bab]

just wanted to send u lots of love and a big hug and im glad your back xxx

[marie1974]

thanku for your pm's katie, u know i used to think u were very opinionated and fiesty, and yes u r hehe, i also thought oh dunno if we would get on cos we might clash like we have once or twice, BUT i have realised lately u r one of the nicest kindest people and like ive told u im here for u anytime matey.

dont u dare leave this place again hun, cos i know u going through alot but i/we will help u. hugs matey xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[samc100]

Glad you want to stay Katie - I'd miss you if you went x

[EmmaJane]

Hi Katie,

All I can say, is you do what you feel is best for you.