View Full Version : I'm Not Coping With The Last Three Days
Hi All,
For the last three days I just haven't been able to cope with my anxiety. It started again on Sunday morning and it hasn't stopped since. I've been getting headaches, pains down the left side of my neck, itchy and dry eyes, dry mouth, choking sensations, shaky hands, rapid heartbeat and terrible agitation. I've had three panic attacks and lack of sleep and now I am left feeling very emotional. I'm snappy at people and beginning to go back into my self hatred. I'm also very jumpy and even the slightest things are giving me frights and making me worse.
I just don't have any mind for anything. I can't go downstairs because I am ashamed and I know my parents will look at me like "Oh here we go again, he's in one of his moods". I'm not in a mood, I'm terribly anxious and emotional and I can't deal with them looking at me like I'm crazy right now because I know I will end up snapping at them even more. so now I'm locked into my bedroom going mad with agitation and just not knowing what to do with myself. I can feel myself getting so angry and I truly hate it. I can't cope with these feelings and I'm scared that I will self harm again.
I'm sorry for ranting on, but I just had to get this out and tell someone,
Edward
Edward h
Speak to your mum and dad if you can, maybe you need to visit the Dr and explain just how bad the anxiety is, have you got any relaxation tapes you can listen to, you need to tell the Dr how bad things are, have you had any counselling or CBT therapy, most areas have mental health crisis teams who can help you get through a bad patch in the short term, the lack of sleep is not helping hun, it makes things worse through no fault of your own its a vicious circle mate,
don't mind me askiing how old are you.
Heather
Tinks_loves_pan
26-11-08, 19:53
if you cannot talk too your family find a stranger too talk too as sometimes talking too those we have no emotional ties too is easier as we are less guarded and more honest, if you do not feel like going out too do thisa as you have access too the net there are many people who will happily listen too you and help in what ever way they can
dare too dream and learn too fly
god bless xLjx:hugs:
Hi Heather,
I think I am going to have to speak to them. They know I suffer anxiety but they just don't know what happens to me when it comes on. I don't have relaxation tapes, but I do have some classical music on my Mp3 player that I might try. Perhaps that might help me to relax a little.
I think I'm going to make an appointment with my GP tomorrow and tell her how bad it has got again. I need something to take the edge off and help me to sleep before I lose my mind altogether.
I am twenty-eight Heather. I've been dealing with depression, anxiety and panic attacks since I was eighteen. The self-harming began when I was sixteen.
sorry about being nosey about your age, it was probably the mum in me being worried because I have two lads of 19 and 20 and would be horrified to think that they could not tell me if they were feeling bad,sorry to hear that your problems have been going on for so long, have you ever had any expert help. There are Crisis Teams and Early intervention teams now that can help with your problems speak to your G.P and ask her to refer you. These teams are usually run by quite young psychiatric nurses whom can be on your wavelength and help a lot and give support.
When you feel like self harming come on here for a chat there is always someone about who can help.
it is horrible and scary when you cannot sleep apparently sleep deprivation is a form of torture that can be used throughout the world. depriving someone of sleep can cause all sorts of problems.
Take care hun
Heather
Sorry to hear you are not feeling to good at the moment. It can feel very lonely and isolated. If you can speak to your family and let them know exactly what is going with you, it may help and hopefully you will then feel a bit better, in knowing you have some support.
Going to see the doctor is a very good idea.
You will find there is someone around on here nearly all the time. If you need to talk come on here, and take your mind off things.
Hope all goes well.
That's no problem Heather. I probably should have mentioned my age anyway when I posted this thread.
I do have a psychiatrist that I spent a lot of time with after numerous self harm and suicide attempts, but I haven't spoken to her in a while now. I've been housebound for the last three months. They used to send a nurse out to visit me at home each Thursday but I was so ashamed that I locked myself into my room. I was horrified at the thought of speaking to a complete stranger. It took me a long time just to get used to my own psychiatrist and open up to her about it all.
I know what you mean about sleep deprivation causing all sorts of problems. It really is a hard thing to cope with. You become more anxious plus very emotional and quite snappy for no reason at all.
The anxiety seems to be calming down a little but I feel like I'm getting numb or something, like the last three days has taken it toll on me and left me both psychically and emotionally drained and I just can't react to it anymore.
Does that make any sense to you?
And thank you Emma. It means a lot knowing that there are people on here who know what I am going through.
:) hi sorry to hear your having a bad time of it at the moment. yes you should go to the doctors good luck with that i hope you are listened to and get the right help. hope you start to feel better soon.
Hiya guys,
I'm not actually too bad this morning. I spent a great deal of last night just crying my eyes out and eventually I did fall asleep, but it was a broken one where I tossed and turned all night with a dry mouth and rapid heartbeat.
I'm not paying too much attention to the symptoms this morning because I just don't want to give into them as much as I have since Sunday. I feel like getting sick but hopefully my cup of tea will help with that.
I'm off to the Doctor this morning and I am going to ask about getting something to sedate me and help me over this period. I know I said in a different thread that I didn't want to go back on medication again, but I really do think that I need it in this case. I will let ye know how I got on after I return home.
I have also explained to her about having trouble leaving the house (I've been housebound for three months now) and she has assured me that she won't put me into the waiting room with everyone else. I know it sounds dramatic, but it's the only way I can possibly face going to see her.
Hiya Tetley,
I got an awful attack when I was down there. I could feel it coming on me as we got closer to leaving the house. When my Mother opened the front door and the light and noise from the street hit me I completely panicked and wanted to run back upstairs into my room with the curtains closed. I managed to get out though and kept taking deep breaths and held my head down until we got there.
When I went into the surgery the receptionist was nice and called the Doctor out to me and she brought me into a room on my own to wait. I was terrified about what they must have been thinking about me, but I felt relief not having to go into the waiting room with the other patients.
The Doctor asked me how long this spell of Anxiety has been happening and I told her that it came on me on Sunday morning and has been getting slowly worse ever since. I also told her that it has been effecting my sleep and making me emotional and that I've been wanting to self harm again. She was very understanding and prescribed me Diazepam 5mg to be taken two times daily for the next seven days. I became very emotional and told her that I may be having a nervous breakdown and she even got the nurse to bring me in a cup of tea. I am to go back again next Thursday morning to discuss going back on my Ciprimal or earlier if things get worse.
I've already taken a Diazepam and it's starting to work so the panic and anxiety is fading for now. I realise that it is just the effects of the medication, but I really do need it for now. Hopefully I can just relax now and be ok because I am sick of being on edge :)
Hi Edward
Reading your posts was like reading about myself. I have been suffering with depression, anxiety and self harming for ten years. I have been in and out of hospital, seen numerous doctors and tried various medication. Some have helped and some haven't. I've lost my children, husband and my home but with support of family, friends, my GP and therapists I have fought back and am on a relatively even keel at the moment. I became ill again this time last year and like you I was housebound. My GP was great and would come to see me at home but I did go to the surgery. Because I was terrified of being in the waiting room, I would stay in the car and she would come out to get me when it was my turn. I've developed a phobia of medication so haven't been taking anything which is frustrating as I know it would help! I know it's so easy to say do this and do that but do try. Try and talk to you parents, although I know what you mean as my Mother was very dismissive of my illness at first but it was because she didn't understand and not that she didn't care. Don't worry about talking to strangers - it's often better. Take small steps each day and gradually they will become longer and longer. I went to my GP on Tuesday and I sat in the waiting room!! Be proud of yourself when you do things however insignificant they seem. I feel other people must think I'm a freak because of all my fears and phobias but I don't worry about them anymore as it could be them one day. I've got my children back which is the most wonderful thing and our relationship is fantastic.
Please take care. Sorry I've waffled on, I just feel for you.
Jodie x
Hiya Jodie,
You aren't waffling on at all. I am terribly sorry to hear that you have suffered so much due to anxiety, depression and self harming. I also know how terrible it is to have our fears and phobias dismissed at the drop of a hat. Some people just don't understand what can happen to us in moments of despair and panic. I am delighted that you are coming on the way you are. Sitting in that waiting room must have been such a huge achievement for you. Well done on that. I will hopefully do that one day too instead of having to hide away in a seperate room in the surgery. Thank you for taking the time to reply and keep up that good work,
Edward Xx :)
:) hi welldone for getting to the doctors your doctor sounds like one of the good ones. i know you didnt want to be on meds but it will help you get through the bad patch. hope you feel better soon. sending you a hug:hugs:
Hiya Spaced,
Thank you. I honestly didn't think I would make it without fainting or getting seriously sick. I wanted to throw up so badly and curl into a ball and just scream with hysteria. I think the medication is vital to me right now so I am ok with it, but thank god it's only for a week to see how things go. Thanks for the hug...Returning one to you :)
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