breeze25
30-11-08, 08:47
Firstly I love the fact that I can post my fears on hear and people understand where I am coming from, and not look at me and think I am a complete loon, which quite frankly is how I am feeling.
For the last 8 months or so, I pretty much have had control over HA managing to dismiss lots of nasty thought that pop into my head. But at the moment I seem to be a spiral of thinking something is wrong.
What I have at the moment is a sore feeling in my back, this is very hard to explain so I will try my best. I have had this feeling for about 6 weeks now, its an area about the size of 5p piece on my back halfway between my back and my size just under where the bra line would be. Now and again (several times a day) i would move and I wold have a sore feeling coming from it, I know I have not injured it or anything and a first didn't think anything of it.
now because I am obsessed with it I am touching it and proding it, so of course the pain is worse (well when I say pain I mean soreness) and its consuming my every though at the moment. There is no spot or mole or anything as I have got my hubby to look about a million times, the thought that is going hrough my head is a tumour as when I lay down it can sometimes feel as though somethng is there, although when I touch it I can feel nothing and I know how with HA you can pretty much convince yourself of something and then 'feel the symptoms'.
Here I am sat here for a Sunday morning while my 2 beautiful kids are watching telly, and deserve to be taken out or something, but I just want to mope, I feel silly and selish today.
The thought of going to the doctor with a sore feeling in my back is making me feel uncomfortable as i know they wont laugh me out the door but I feel I would be taking up an appointment for nothing!.
Deleted this twice as feel so silly even to post but here goes.
For the last 8 months or so, I pretty much have had control over HA managing to dismiss lots of nasty thought that pop into my head. But at the moment I seem to be a spiral of thinking something is wrong.
What I have at the moment is a sore feeling in my back, this is very hard to explain so I will try my best. I have had this feeling for about 6 weeks now, its an area about the size of 5p piece on my back halfway between my back and my size just under where the bra line would be. Now and again (several times a day) i would move and I wold have a sore feeling coming from it, I know I have not injured it or anything and a first didn't think anything of it.
now because I am obsessed with it I am touching it and proding it, so of course the pain is worse (well when I say pain I mean soreness) and its consuming my every though at the moment. There is no spot or mole or anything as I have got my hubby to look about a million times, the thought that is going hrough my head is a tumour as when I lay down it can sometimes feel as though somethng is there, although when I touch it I can feel nothing and I know how with HA you can pretty much convince yourself of something and then 'feel the symptoms'.
Here I am sat here for a Sunday morning while my 2 beautiful kids are watching telly, and deserve to be taken out or something, but I just want to mope, I feel silly and selish today.
The thought of going to the doctor with a sore feeling in my back is making me feel uncomfortable as i know they wont laugh me out the door but I feel I would be taking up an appointment for nothing!.
Deleted this twice as feel so silly even to post but here goes.