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hi there am really happy as i have not overdosed for the four days its a record for me trying real hard to keep it up as well just thought that i would share it with you all [8D]:D
What is it that you normally take Leanne?
Well done hun - keep it up :D
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
ibrufen paracetomol or combo of both sometime when is really bad i drink alcohol with it as well i know i shoudnt
Well done you, here's to the next four days.
Take care
Elaine x
yeah thanks it will be a world record for deff
Leanne ,
I'm extremely pleased to hear it - Here's to the next week of no overdosing too.
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
Well done Leanne. I know how hard it is to stop self harming. Take it one day at a time.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
yeah thanks karen am really trying too!!
Good on ya Girl. I am pleased. Stay Strong.
Take care,
Love PIP'S XX
soz everyone had bad night and took pills and hurt myself with knife but am going to try again really angry at self :(
hi leanne,
well its good that you are still with us.
pick yourself up and start again. dont be angry with yourself, but with the situation - you will get there in the end.
you take care ... andrew
thanks andrew
guess you are right but it just feels that every time i start to stop something happen to make me do it again :(
hi leanne,
live and learn. recognise the things and thoughts that make you want to do it again, they are your triggers. you can teach yourself not to react to them ( it takes as long as it takes ) but you will get there in the end if you keep trying.
you take care .. andrew
am trying to not do it honest but sometimes i do it with out thinking as i hear voices and they tell me to do it but will try my best promise
Hi Leanne
There is no point in getting angry with yourself for what you did yesterday. It is already in the past and done with.
The important thing is to pick yourself up and carry on. Don't put undue pressure on yourself but just aim to take it one day at a time. We all have slip ups along the way.
Focus instead on the time you went without self harming and know that you can do it again.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
thanks karen have spoke to doc about it today[^]
hi am really happy as i really needed to hurt myself last night but didnt yeah just tried to keep busy will see how long i can go for now
That another great step Leanne..
Very well done
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
Very well done Leanne.
One step at a time.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
yeah thanks ya all are great will let you know how i get on [8D]
well done leanne, one day at a time .. take care andrew
thanks andrew
had another failed night last night sick of it wish never started it in first place :(
hi leanne,
keep your chin up hun, you'll find a way .. tc andrew
Hi Leanne
Don't think of it as a failure. Every time you manage to resist is a success. Keep a note of these times to remind yourself how well you are doing.
It isn't easy to stop and it doesn't happen overnight, but you are doing well. Keep going!
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Leanne,
Please don't be hard on yourself, you are doing
really well and making progress.
Keep going Leanne.
TAKE CARE
WISHING YOU WELL
LOVE JILLXXX
Don't dwell on what went wrong instead,
focus on what to do next.
Spend your energies on moving forward.
thanks all
resisted again last night had good drink instead
WELL DONE LEANNE [^][^]:D
LOVE JILLXXX
Great changes may not happen right away,
but with effort the difficult may become easy.
thanks jill going to have drink to night so wont have to have the urges as bad
Well done for resisting last night Leanne.
Do you keep a journal? It can help to have a record of all the times you manage to distract yourself from harming yourself so you can recognise the progress you are making.
Keep going a day at a time.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
thanks karen i use to keep a diary but dont as it use to be full of the bad i had done but might try again
well not hurt self yet [8D]
but feel as though im drinking to make it better
So make a huge effort not to drink as much today. Find something to do which will keep you busy instead
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
yeah will try meg its just easier thats all
had bad night drank self stupid but still hurt self i just dont know what is wrong with me sorry really am trying to stop
just not as easy as i thought it would be
I wish I could help you Leanne, I honestly do.
Is there any where you can lock the things you use to hurt yourself away and give someone else the key?
Sometimes it helps to have a drink now and again, but the more you drink the more you'll need to drink more to have any affect.
Try and keep a smile on your face, but not walking around looking too deranged!
Take care of yourself hun
xxxx
hi leanne,
i never found drink to be a very good cure for anything, its too inconsistant, sometimes it works great, sometimes crap.
i think everyone can see that you're trying so nothing to be sorry about, hug for you. you just have to treat it as another bump in the road and today is a fresh journey.
im not that sure i know how to advise you how to stop self-harming. but from a common sense point of view, try and see your 'patterns' - the thoughts, feelings or circumstances that make you want to harm. And how and when you actually carry out the harm. hopefully understanding the problem better will help you overcome it easier.
dont be down on yourself, you will get there in the end. you take care ... andrew
looby - thanks for the advice i know its only me who can do anything to stop it
andrew - i agree with you drink is prob not the best option but it helps to block out stuff sometimes it does just make it worse i know
but every time i do something stupid i feel like i am letting you all down
thanks everyone i am really trying my best [8D]
Hi Leanne
You are not letting us down. It is not easy to stop self-harming and I think you are putting too much pressure on yourself expecting yourself to be able to stop straight away.
Think of all the progress you have been making with this recently. When I joined here last July I was self-harming daily too and thought I would never be able to stop, but now I have, apart from a very occasional slip up. However, it took months to get to this point.
I think you also know drinking as a substitute is no going to help. It may seem easier but you are effectively substituting one problem for another. It is much more healthy to find other ways of distracting yourself from the urges to harm, rather than trying to blot out these feelings with alcohol.
So you gave in a harmed yesterday. This doesn't matter. What you can do now is pick yourself up and start again from today. Take it a day at a time remember?
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
thanks karen it good to know someone understands
Leanne ,
Are you geting any help for this although I do think you are making some headway.
It seems that you have lots of time on your hands and its in the evenings that this seems to be the problem.
What triggers the self harm episodes, is it alcohol or thoughts or ??
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
hi meg
yeah do have time on hands but not as much as you would think as i have to be ready to jump f dad says so wish it was not like this though
triggers yes mainly at night alcohol does not help sometimes but mainly thought and the voices
i am waiting to see someone at the hospital but not to sure what for
been to see doc she told me it was d.+ a.d never gave me anything told her bout self harm and all she said was are you planning on doing it again tlod her its not something i plan
hey ppl i have resisted hurting myself since sat am really happy about it just hope i dont mess it up again
no pressure though LOL
Good for you Leanne.
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...
thanks meg its not long i know but it feels like years to me
well done leanne, pleased your pleased .. tc andrew
hi all having the urges to hurt self again i scratched and bite arms but am try not to take pills or use knife think i might go for walk or something
Hi Leanne
How are you now?
Good on you for going out for a walk to distract yourself. Aim to keep doing things like this and you may well find the urge to cut or take the pills will go.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
hi karen
ended up just gettin so drunk that could hardly move but at least i did not hurt self with pills or knife
Hi Leanne,
Its good that youve not self harmed but it seems like youve turned to drink now to wipe out the self harm thoughts - try and stay off the drink and give you self a task or somthing to focus on when you get the urges.
Tatty B xx
yeah you got it in one
will try but urges just get stronger and then i fail by hurting self then i have to punish myself but i do understand what you mean
You dont have to punish yourself you are not a bad person - you like making scoobies, try focusing on this .
Tatty B xx
yeah but novelty is wearing off now
have read two book since sat i just dont know how to ocupie my mind all the time
hi leanne,
you can always read more books, you could even try writing one lol. learn a foreign language, try painting/drawing. listen to music, watch your favorite tv/dvds, become a chat room junkie - theres always things you can try to occupy yourself, the trick is finding ones that you like and that will hold your attention.
anyway, hopefully yesterday went well for you and today is stress free, you take care ... andrew
thanks andrew
its been it been 4 days had not hurt self till last night well early hours this morning worse thing was did not relise till this morning as i had got so out of it on drink that i can not remember doing it
hi all doing good not hurt self to bad so think thats good
Well done Leanne.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
thanks but messed up again last night sorry:(
No Need to apologise Leanne.
Yesterday is now in the past. Pick yourself up and carry on again from today.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
thanks just go drunk on sat and sun but am ok
head hurts though :(
hi all am doing ok drinking more but really trying to stop it
only had few mess ups but am working on it still [8D]
hi leanne,
pleased to read your still in the fight and doing ok. keep on working at it, one day at a time. you take care .. andrew
You're doing well Leanne
Keep ata it . ememebr if you go away for volunteering you will not be able to drink in any quantities then
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?
Was great to meet you today Leanne!! Keep up the good work :D
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
yeah i know and when you where drinking yesterday i had to try hard not to drink which was amazing
dont know if i will go for the vol job yet see how i feel
hi all been good as my best pal susie keeps telling me off when i not been good and my butt hurts so much from her kicking it all the time LOL
although i have not cut or od on pills i do drink still but not as much i know i will get it in the neck if susie reads this so soz now and not my butt again plz
hi leanne, its good to read that you've not been harming yourself, a BIG WELL DONE. and showing some control over your drinking is good positive news as well. hopefully your feeling pleased and proud of your progress, you take care .. andrew
hey thanks andrew but would not be able to have done it with out you all but i know i will muck up a few times but i have to overcome that when it happens
hi leanne, i think thats the right attitude to have, IF things dont go to plan, you just have to pick yourself up, give yourself a hug and try again, you'll get there in the end, tc .. andrew
thanks andrew and everyone else who is helping me but my next big thing is my hols and i wont have net so can not pm anyone and am dreading it cause i know something is going to go wrong when i am there
Leanne - I'm sure nothing will go wrong. How long will you be away for? Remember, you can text me anytime :D
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
hi sarah 8 days really am dreading it i thought that i would be looking forward to it but the closer it gets the more i get worried
That is only normal Leanne. Once you get there and settle down, I'm sure you'll have a great time. Also, you will have your mobile so you won't feel isolated :D
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
yeah i suppose i would never forgot my moby cause i take it every where
not looking 4ward to travelng either prob spend most of my time asleep to pass it all away
How far it is from you? Are you going alone? :D
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
couple of hours i have been told but dont know what traffic will be like no not going alone as we are all going together but i have to share bus with auntie who i dont get on with which should be fun! :(
there will be 18 of us altogether its going to be mad 6 kids and 12 adults
[Wow!] Leanne that sounds like fun!! There are so many of you going that you won't have time to be bored or feel anxious. Hope you have a great time!! :D
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
hey all i mucked up again last night took pills although it was only 12 and drank quite a bit of vodka i am ok but could not talk to anyone as my mate was not well her self
feel like crap now sorry everyone let you all down again :(
darkphantom
27-07-05, 17:12
Lea
im really worried now, why you do it? i sorry i wasnt there last nite but you know why xx
i care alot about you babe, please dont do things like this, i cant lose you or anyone else here especially at this time.
please take care of yourselve please go to the hospital im really worried
if anyone else hears from lea please contact me im online all tonight
im real worried
thanku
susie:(
darkphantom
27-07-05, 17:49
Hye babe
just found you here, and yes im kicking your butt again and again and again does it hurt [8D]
remember im with you always and you doing great
love ya
susie xxxxxxxxxxxx
What pills did you take Leanne? Why did you do it?
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
Hi Leanne
You haven't let anyone down so don't put this added pressure on yourself.
So you have slipped up. Instead of focusing on this, remind yourself of all the times you have managed to stop yourself from harming yourself. You have been making progress.
Although there may be times when you still give in, you are still finding ways to prevent yourself from doing so much more than you were a short while ago.
Are you keeping up with your journal?
You could try preparing a list of activities that you can use to distract yourself when you feel like harming and keep it somewhere within easy reach. Then when you get the urge to hurt yourself, instead be determined to work through the activities on the list first. Quite often the urge to harm passes before you get to the end of the list.
Keep going Leanne. You are doing well.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
thanks all reason i did it cause the voices told me to and really did try to not to listen to them honest
what i took ibrufen
not keeping jornal anymore
hi leanne,
you haven't let anyone down, we know your trying. keep your chin up hun, you'll get there in the end ... ive not heard voices before, but if you are hearing them then maybe you could try shouting back and saying you are better now and have moved on, rather than trying to ignore them. you take care .. andrew
i know where you are coming from but its not that easy but that only half
darkphantom
29-07-05, 03:51
Lea you have not let anyone down you are doing good babe [:X]
When you hear those voices tell them to go away and put that song on ok then the voices will stop.
I reall proud of you x
you should be proud of what you did tonight as well thankyou babe
love you loads
we are walking that road lea side by side all the way ok.
susie xxxxxx
i never proud of my self as nothing to be proud off
i really wanted to harm last night but talked to sal and susie which helped a bit just wish i could sleep more it does not matter how much pyhsical or mental activities i do all day my brain still does not sleep
darkphantom
30-07-05, 16:46
Lea
what did i tell you today, you have a lot to be proud of,
you are trying so hard, and now instead of harming or taking the pills you are talking to us, which is brilliant isnt it.
You are helping me so much specially at the minute and you talked me out of things
hold your head up high babe you have a lot to be proud of
you are doing so well, keep talking to us and keep walking and walking and walking im keeping up with you :D
love ya
susie
hey thanks but i try not to take on board what i have to be proud of cause that is when things go wrong
hey susie keep walking and talking if you can keep up with me lol
i nearly hurt the other day wont say which one cause someone will blame there self and it was nothing to do with them it was just how i was feeling and i get like that sometimes but really trying my best scouts honner
darkphantom
05-08-05, 11:19
Hi Lea
Just wanted to say you are doing really well
please keep it up
cause i real proud of you
love ya
susie
hey thanks i really proud of you
Hi Leanne,
You're doing really well ok...remember what ive told you. You can do it.
:D
Tatty B xx
hey thanl tatty yor brill and will be real hard nxt wk
Try not to look on the holiday as a negative thing - i know its easier said than done, but i really think this break will do you the world of good. It will be a great distraction & you'll probably find yourself enjoying it.
If it gets hard at any point you know you can text me ok
Tatty B xx
thanks all prob end up spendin most of time drinking and eating oh and txtin ppl LOL
Leanne
I know that going on this holiday may be difficult for you but try to find some good periods of time.
With all those children you can enjoy playing games and telling them stories, you can go off for a walk, spend some time writing for yourself etc.
It gives you a break from your usual routine too.
You're only a text away from others who care about you and we look forward to having you back online.
As for saying you do not have anything to be proud of.. Its not often we meet someone who is struggling as much as you are, yet constantly is thinking about how to help others and providing such a wonderful support network for many on here .
You're not only progressing in helping yourself which is hard enough, but are also looking after your Dad and doing a great job on email and phone too.
Thank you Leanne very much. I think you have a lot to be pleased and proud about right now.
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?
darkphantom
05-08-05, 23:08
Hi lea
i agree with meg you have alot to be proud about
you put others before yourselve and youve help loads people
hold your head up high and be PROUD
cause we all proud of you
love you loads
thanks meg maybe you are right but i get it from my mam as that is what she was alays like and i am lucky to have you all as my friends
Leanne
You do not have to be like your Mum on this one for your future . Become aware of it and make some changes.
Tell your counsellor this is something you'd like to work on .
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?
darkphantom
18-08-05, 10:17
Hi babe
Just to tell you again after our chat last night, you are doing really well, you are handling those bad days better now and i proud of you.
keep thinking to your selve that you have a lot to be proud about.
And want to thank you for the help you have given me especially in the last couple of days, you got me through a bad time.
Looking forward to seeing you today, we will have a great fun time.
I should be able to do it in less than 12 hrs now :D
Keep smiling cos your doing well
luv ya
susie
hey meg i dont see a counsellor anymore and have not for few months now although so days i wish i was but hey i am me and no one but me can change me
susie thanks yeah real so canny wait till you visit as i was have fun again
hey all have had few bad times but am getting out of the dark hole now with help from all of you and esp susie thanks all again
darkphantom
26-08-05, 15:58
hey babe
you doing really really well, real proud of you, keep climbing out of that hole, cos we are all with you
love ya loads
susie[:X][^]
hey you not kick my butt yeah lol
darkphantom
26-08-05, 16:06
na i not kick your butt babe unless you fall back in the hole but then if you fall back in the hole you will make cottage cheese :D
so keep climbing cos im right behind you
i real proud of you xxx
yeah cottage cheese lol ppl will think we are mad but hey they not like it if we told them what it was lol
yeah and i would squash you LOL
darkphantom
29-08-05, 10:56
Just wanted to say that you are doing so well, you seem tobe feeling happier each day.
and you are controlling those voices really well.
your doing really well babe
keep it up
real proud of you
love ya xx[8D][:X]
soz all i have been drinking all night feel ill now but iy was good when it lasted like all things do
aawww Leanne hope you feel better soon hun
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
thanks self infickted i know but hit knee with metal bar and hit head off floor but im ok
hi and soz i hurt self again today just fed up of everything thats going on at the mo and i can only see one solution
hi leanne, just caught up with how you are, hug for you, you can get through this tough time, try and keep your chin up hun ... tc andrew
thanks andrew just wish it would go away then i be able to focus better
darkphantom
02-09-05, 15:06
hi babe
hey this is a new start today, just think things hopefully will only get better from now on ok.
last few days we have both been through it, but we can come out the other side and start to enjoy life again, i did hard thinking last night and we can both be stronger now after these days.
so how bout it lets get back on that road and walk forward together.
and lets have some fun, and with the help of everyone here and each other we can do it.
lets drink (juice) to a happy fun filled life and our friendship for ever
luv ya x[:X]
yeah but nxt few days are going to be hard to as thats when i got bk from work to see the babys (abbie) little tiny body and get questioned by police so plz be strong 4 me
darkphantom
02-09-05, 15:22
aww babe
i sorry, but dont forget none of that was your fault, please start to believe.
and i promise you i will be here for you to help you through that and i will be strong for you ok.
you no i am here for you and only a text or phone call away,
i promise you will be ok
trust me ok, start to believe what we all our telling you and you will feel better ok
We are all here for you Leanne, ok? Remember you can post when you feel down and get loads of support :D
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
thanks all i just going to try and stay high all wk end that should help
what do you mean by 'stay high'?
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
just what it means stay on a high (sugar)
it ok i dont do drugs unless they would help me of couse
Medication mite help you leanne - Not any other kind of drugs - like the hosputal advised you. They said to see your doctor to talk about anti D's.
Tatty B xx
yeah i know but at this mo in time i would try any type of drugs that will help and have to ring doc nxt wk
Illegal or recreational drugs wont help at all. its just blocking ut the problem and it could leave to further problems.
Tatty B xx
yeah just want horrid feelings to go away thats all soz
susie plz dont kick me ok
darkphantom
03-09-05, 16:23
Right you gona get your butt kick now babe, :) please do not go down that road with drugs it will make things a thousand times worse trust me.
if you dont want to make the call on monday to docs and i understand why, i told you i will do it it is no trouble.
you need to keep posting here ok and let those feelings out, because you got so many people here who love you and want to help and together we will help you all the way.
and you know i am here for you 24/7 so please do not go down that bad road of drugs, it would make me so sad cos then i would feel that i failed to help you.
we all love you lea
((((((Lea))))))
luv ya:D
Then u need to take some steps and help yourself leanne - the hospital have told you 2 weeks ago to see your doctor about anti-depressants. You need to see this as a postive step - you can talk to your doctor about the benifits etc and they will help as best they can.
Tatty B xx
Talk to your doctor and see what they suggest to you hun. We all at times need that extra bit of support and help through this.
Take care.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
"Life is a distance and to travel that distance you were given the strength and guidance to do so".
darkphantom
05-09-05, 14:07
Hi babe
just wanted to say youve done really well the last couple days proud of you, remember what you got to do tomorrow and ring doc ok, you can do i no you can cos you so much stronger now ok
love ya
susie
yeah i try ring depends if dad is in or not
had real bad night last night al could do is think of ending it had no sleep and have made plans just in case dont get through nxt time soz prob not what you want to hear but i going mad i know i am
couldnt even help a friend when she needed me so what use am i if cant even do that yeah i know no use
feel real bad and want it all to go away
soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz soz
Leanne we talked last night. You are not losing it, you are coping very well for how you are feeling, along with added pressure.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
"Life is a distance and to travel that distance you were given the strength and guidance to do so".
Just be yourself hun and only deal with what you can cope with.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
"Life is a distance and to travel that distance you were given the strength and guidance to do so".
hi leanne, hopefully your feeling better today .. tc andrew
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