Hereford Al
09-12-08, 11:43
Hi all.
I've had a good few weeks. The most "normal" I have felt since all my issues began back in July. Nowhere near 100% perfect by any means, but I managed to get into town most days and sorted out all of my Christmas shopping and treated myself to some nice new clothes to wear during the winter. I even went into work last Thursday for an hour to chat to people and read through some of the hundreds of unread e-mails I had. Even a month ago that would have been practically impossible. I still get the odd jittery moment here and there in busy shops or when stuck in traffic but it has not been as bad *touch wood* as it was.
I'm due to return to work next Wednesday (part time for a month or so at first) and I can feel the nervous feeling building up inside of me again and had a small panic attack on Sunday afternoon (although that might have been due to the few glasses of wine I had on Saturday night!). I'm scared that I will break down again at work a few weeks/months down the line and have to go through all of this again. I don't think I could face that.
I wanted to go back before Christmas rather than afterwards because (a) people around me might be a bit less stressed due to festive spirit, and (b) I would end up worrying myself sick all the way through Christmas and New Year and really be a downer on my family.
Now I'm having doubts about whether I am ready to return yet even though I desperately want to get back if nothing else but to avoid the crappy daytime TV that has numbed my brain the last few months!
Any tips from those who have been off for a few months and successfully returned to work would be appreciated. How did you cope with the first morning especially.
Thanks,
Al
I've had a good few weeks. The most "normal" I have felt since all my issues began back in July. Nowhere near 100% perfect by any means, but I managed to get into town most days and sorted out all of my Christmas shopping and treated myself to some nice new clothes to wear during the winter. I even went into work last Thursday for an hour to chat to people and read through some of the hundreds of unread e-mails I had. Even a month ago that would have been practically impossible. I still get the odd jittery moment here and there in busy shops or when stuck in traffic but it has not been as bad *touch wood* as it was.
I'm due to return to work next Wednesday (part time for a month or so at first) and I can feel the nervous feeling building up inside of me again and had a small panic attack on Sunday afternoon (although that might have been due to the few glasses of wine I had on Saturday night!). I'm scared that I will break down again at work a few weeks/months down the line and have to go through all of this again. I don't think I could face that.
I wanted to go back before Christmas rather than afterwards because (a) people around me might be a bit less stressed due to festive spirit, and (b) I would end up worrying myself sick all the way through Christmas and New Year and really be a downer on my family.
Now I'm having doubts about whether I am ready to return yet even though I desperately want to get back if nothing else but to avoid the crappy daytime TV that has numbed my brain the last few months!
Any tips from those who have been off for a few months and successfully returned to work would be appreciated. How did you cope with the first morning especially.
Thanks,
Al