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Sal x
29-06-05, 12:52
Hi Everyone,

Just need to ask a few quick questions for some reassurrance.

I keep getting this pain in my forehead that feels like someone is pulling my vain from the top of my head (sounds weird, I know) but this really scares me.

I have convinced my self that it is my blood getting clogged in my head and that any minute now I will fall over with a blood clot on the brain.

Any advice ???

Also, I am constanly worrying about my husband. I get convinced that something bad is going to happen to him.
Its because I am so happy with him and I feel I don't deserve to be happy so something bad must happen to me to counter this out.
I drop him off in a morning in Leeds centre and he walks up to his offices (which is about half a mile) then I go on to my work but I have to ring him when I get to work to make sure hes there.

On the odd occasion when he doesn't answer his phone, I convince myself he has been run over or been crushed by something (I am MAD in know)
This sends me then into a MAJOR panic attack which is only stopped by him contacting me so I know everything is ok.

Does anyone else worry like this or am I some weird freak ??

Sal x

Peru83
29-06-05, 13:02
I have developed a fear of fags and coffee! now that's weird!lol

The feelings of pressure in your head will most likely be due to stress or at least that's what my gp said to me. Sometimes when I get them they can even make my eye's wince and sometimes water.

Also I am sure that you do deserve to be happy, don't sell yourself short. And I am also sure that nothing will happen to your husband. I know that me saying this won't stop you worrying. Do you both have mobile phones? If so, then why don't you get him to text you when he gets there rather than you phoning, It might stop you worrying on those odd occations that he doesn't answer.

Hope you feel better soon

claire

"Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most!"

kairen
29-06-05, 14:54
Hi Sal,

i would say the pain is def, stress, i used to get it in the back of my head,
When my daughter started school 3 years ago, i was like that with her, as soon as i walked away from the school gates i was sure someone as going to go back in and snatch her, or something worse as the years have gone on and i have got stronger these fears have eased off quite a bit, i still get the thoughts but am able to dismiss them as just anxiety as i know in the back of my mind she is fine, so i try not to dwell on them instead i think of something more positive, and try and kep my mind occupied

so your in no way a freak xxx

take care

kairen x

pips
29-06-05, 17:31
Hi Sal,

I so understand,

I am a terrible worrier as well.

I often feel if I'm to POSITIVE something bad will happen mad i know it's silly.

I think ive nearly killed of all the people who I love in my crazy mind with worrying something bad has happened to them! Mad huh.

Tell yourself it's just your mind working overtime and you certainly deserve happiness as much as anyone hun!!!!

Take care,

Love PIP'S X X

vernon
29-06-05, 17:58
Hi sal welcome to the site, Either this is pretty normal and common with anxiety sufferes or i am mad too, My wife and myself are never apart so i dont have that worry but, when any of my kids are out a go fratic if they dont answer there phone right away, it realy makes me ill. my youngest is 18 but even with the 27 year old who is in the army now when he was home and out at night i am the same, (have they been beat up, have they had an accident, why wont they answer there phone i am realy bad. And the biggest panic of all is when they went to school or home time and i hear an ambulace it was unbarable..also when the wife does go to local shops only 5 mins away if she isnt back within half hour i panic and go looking for her, usualy just a queue in shops lol so no I think you are normal

Sal x
30-06-05, 11:40
Thanks everyone for replying to me............it really helps.

Has any one ever got over fears like this or am I stuck with it?

The hardest thing I find with it is that other people don't understand (mostly my family)
I feel that people will think that i have got my husband so under the thumb and he can't do anything.
The truth is, I would love it for him to just even go away on a stag night or something so he could have a good time and for me not to worry, buts its impossible at the moment as I would go out of my mind.

I am very lucky with the fact that my husband is really understanding and will do anything to help me.

My sister and my mum just think I am weired as they pride them selves in telling everyone that they are strong people and don't need men (even though they are both married and couldn't be on their own, so its all a front)

I am just going on now, so I will finish.............thanks again for replying.

Sal x

If anyone else has the same problem with their family, I would be grateful if you coul PM me or reply.
Ta xx

seh1980
30-06-05, 12:50
hi Sal,

My family don't really understand either. My mum thinks that it's all in my head, which it is but not in the way she thinks!! She things that I just need to snap out of it. If only it were that easy!! It seems like all your fears have got the better of you. They will calm down eventually but you need to convince yourself that there's nothing to worry about. Have your husband go down to the pub or the shops for an hour. When he comes home, tell yourself "See? He's fine and I have nothing to worry about!!"

Sarah :D

"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal

Meg
30-06-05, 14:04
**Has any one ever got over fears like this or am I stuck with it?**

You can get over this but as with most things anxiety wise you will need to take steps to reduce this, as Sarah mentions, and learn to pass over trust and responsibility for his own wellbeing to your husband.

He can look after himself and the likelyhood is that he will be fine, but should something happen, by the time he should have been back it will already have happened and you do not have any control over this whatsoever.

You cannot take on the responsibility for someone elses safety - you can worry about it endlessly, it has little effect on them, but has a far reaching effect on your own wellbeing.

My partner works in inner city Nottingham 3 nights a week, carrying large sums of cash in St.Annes where they have at least a shooting a night.
It used to worry me sick and I made him text every hour etc but I quickly realized that if he missed a text I got even more frantic and what was I going to do if I couldn't get him on the phone due perhaps to signal, with customers etc-

Was I going to go out there and drive about aimlessly looking for him when I don't know the people or the area -working myself up into a dreadful state - I don't think so .. so I stopped all my controls and decided that if he was involved in an incident I would either get a call from a hospital or the police and I would deal with the facts rather than my own imaginary worse case scenarios.

Recently he was involved in a altracation with a gang of ****s and he managed to hold 4 of them until the police arrived so I am even more confident in his ability and that evening I hadn't given him any extra thoughts and was out enjoying myself somewhere else so now I've kicked my presumed sixth sense into touch as well.



Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

Cinders4
04-07-05, 14:34
When things are going well for me. I usually start to think this is too good to be true... thats when I start to fear that something terrible will happen to my partner or one of my children. I even visualise tthings happening and see myself at funerals etc,,,, very horrible and so time consuming.

This sends me into panic until I get things back into proportion or get distracted by real issues which I do actually deal with okay.

I think its kind of a defence, preparing yourself for something terrible so that if it were to happen you could deal with it...... Its just such a shame that we spend so much of our time worrying about things we may not ever have to deal with rather than just living.....

Id like to just get up in the morning and live that day.........facing its challenges and enjoying the nice experiences that life also brings.

for people like us, it is hard to just "be" isnt it???

Glad you found the site, it helps enormously. You probably wont believe it, but reading and replying to your post has helped me today.

Take care and feel free to pm me.

JO