Pregnant, really bad cold and emmetephobic!!!

[andie73]

Hi Guys

I found out on Christmas day that I am pregnant. Since then I have been ill with a really bad cold. I am sooo drowsy most of the time but am then gripped by a wave of panic. I was happy on Christmas Day when I found out I was pregnant but have been in a state since.

I have tocophoia and emmetephobia, which is fear of pregnancy and being sick. I just don't know how I am going to cope. This was planned and is has taken 18 mths to get pregnant as I would often avoid my husband at my most fertile times. I have said a few times to my hubby and dad and step mum that I don't want this baby and that I feel like there's an alien inside of me. They of course were horrified at my reaction to being pregnant. But I can't help it. I sooo badly want children but my health anx and fears make this seem such an impossible task.

I am so frightened of morning sickness. I know that not everyone gets it, and I don't feel sick at the moment but I am gripped with terror about it. I keep waking up through the night and saying "no,no I can't do this" to my hubby. He reassures me the best he can but inside I am terrified. The day after Boxing Day I cried so much I had red marks under my eyes that have only just faded.

The fact that I have a really bad cold is not helping. I woke up sweating last night, the bed was soaking wet. It panicked me, lke everything else in life!!! My hubby was very understanding but he has now had a bad night sleep, and has just left for work. I really begged him not to leave me but he had no choice. I am supposed to be at work today too, but I just don't feel well enough.

Why can't I be normal and be glad that I am pregnant, accept that I may get some sickness but that it will pass, and that I have a cold right now that will also get better and just settle down on the sofa and relax. Why do I feel as if something dreadful is going to happen?? Please help cos I am really low and really really scared.

[Boos Mum]

I had severe morning sickness, it was really hard there are meds that help. I do have a lovely DD no to show for it. I'm here if you need someone who has btdt :hugs:

[rocklover]

I am emetephobic and my worst fear happened and I got hyperemesis, I was in hospital for a week having daily injections, then got meds by mouth. I can honestly say, it didn't put me off pergnancy because you forget all the crap stuff when the baby comes. The thing is, you may be totally fine, I know many who sailed through their entire pregnancy with flying colours!!

Whatever happens, I promise you will cope, you just find a way because the baby ends up being your focus, you worry more about it's health than your own. I don't know it happens, but it does, have faith in yourself and your body!!

[Boos Mum]

I had hyperemesis for 9 months at the time I said never again but now........ :winks:

[andie73]

Hi

Thanks all so much for your replies. I really am experiencing the power of this web site now that I am really struggling. It is so good to hear that other people with emmetephobia have successfully had children.

I have been very emotional for the last few days and very low. Today I am trying to be more positive after talking to my husband during a panic attack this morning at about 4am. I saw how in love he is with this baby already. I cannot let this fear of mornong sickness and the fear of labour stop me from making our lives complete. I'm saying all this now but how unearth I will get through it all I really don't know. It feels like climbing mount everest without any training or equipment!!!

Thank you again and anymore advice is very gratefully recieved. I'm feeling pretty desparate.

[belle]

Congratulations :)

I was one of the lucky ones. I have emetophobia and was really worried about morning sickness. I'm not saying i didn't feel nauseaous, because i did, (not all the time), but i was never sick once. Didn't even gag!

x

[Boos Mum]

Sorry you had another attack, hormones wont help

Normal morning sickness is gone pretty quick though

Just remember the goal :yahoo:

[Ellie25]

Hiya andie....

how are you doing today?

I'm a fellow emet also 35 and female. I so feel for you but pray that with help, you will get through the pregnancy. I've given up all hope of ever having children now.

I can really understand why you feel so terrified. Use this site as much as poss and see what other support you can get.

PM any time if it helps....

hugs,
Ellie
xx

[samc100]

Hi Andie

Being pregnant makes the calmest and saniest of people freak out a little (so there is no hope for us!!!). Some of this is hormones and very natural and if you have a cold then you are bound to feel below par too.

Go and see your Dr and tell them how stressful this is making you and you are worrying yourself, they will hopefully refer you to your midwife earlier than usual and she should be able to support you ( they will have seen this before and be able to help).

Some maternity hospitals have classes for mums-to-be to help them through the stress. My mate went to them and they had reflexlogy, massages etc and she said it really helped feel she wasn't alone in feeling like this. I was really jealous they never let me go to any of the classes.

For nausea I found sucking on mint imperials helped me. Some people say take a cracker or biscuit to bed and nibble on it before getting up. Morning sickness doesn't make many people actually throw up - the majority of people just feel really yucky.

[andie73]

Thanks everyone.

I am calming down a little. It doesn't help though when my sis who is nearly 10 weeks pregnant keeps telling me how many times a day she has been sick. It's weird, I want to know so I can prepare myself for it, but then I replay the conversation over and over in my head till it drive me mad.

I am getting counselling every week, I had my first session on Monday. It did help but I feel the panic rising again soon after I leave the session.

My main concern at the moment is how unearth I will cope with work if I do feel or am sick. I work alone in a hospital coffee shop and have to prepare and serve food. Whenever panic strikes I just want to run, but I can't as there is a till and cash to worry about, plus ringing my boss who you can never find, to tell her I need to go home. I would rather die than be sick at work, so I am really scared about this.

Please please help cos I don't want to lose my job, but I am too scared to go in at the moment.