View Full Version : I keep thinking im DYING
I struggle EVERYDAY to sit in a lecture room full of people and not have an inner battle trying to keep myself from bursting out thru that door and never coming back. It probably doesnt help that I study physiology so every second im thinking about my resipiration and heart rate, i hear every beat and am concious of every breath i take. I keep thinking my heart will stop any second. 1 second im sitting in my class thinking about something, the next im sweating, im panicking, my heart rate increases! Im obsessed with where we go after we die, im scared of not existing anymore. IM GOING CRAZY. I feel pressure on my chest, my breathing is shallow because I CANT TAKE A FULL BREATH. I went to the doctor, she said she cant hear anything in my lungs. but im thinking its my heart. I havent had proper sleep in weeks thinking i will die tonight, this is it, im done. HELP PLEASE im 20 years old and i have too much to deal with, this feels silly, i have exams coming up and i cant focus on anything but the fact that im going to DIE ANY SECOND
Hi Lilychk
When I was 21 in 1977 I went through exactly what you have described and a few times since then. Eventually i found a GP who listened and what she told me was to add up the amount of times I had thought I was going to die and then subtract the times I had!!! I thought for the first time that I had met someone who was madder than me but then I went away and thought about it and tried to work out the maths........... I'm now 52 I worked out that roughly I had thought I was going to Die about 3 or 4 times every month for 31 years and being as my Maths sucks I couldn't work it out then got wound up about it and as a result Panic set in etc etc....then I finally figured out that what my GP was saying was that it is one thing to think your going to Die and quite another to actually do it and the maths was irrelevant........ I wish you luck and NEVER GIVE UP
Bluesky :)
just to let you know i have the same feeling about 7times a week been suffering from panic attacks for five years and it happens all the time now trying to recover from these things as by joining this site may i wish you well and hope you good luck in youre exams.
panicagain
08-01-09, 20:09
:hugs: So sorry your feeling this way but your not alone, i also feel like this all the time:weep:
Vanilla Sky
08-01-09, 20:24
Your so not alone, i think this is all part of anxiety and each one of us has to find our own way of dealing with it and talking about it does help especially to people who dont think that way, someone will say something to you that you will take on board eg i like to think we will have no memory of dying, i mean can you remember being born ? I think we are reborn again so we better get rid of our anxieties coz im sure i dont want to bring it in to my next life! I wonder what others think of that theory maybe they could post here so we can share our thoughts. You are going through a stressful time with your exams perhaps you will find that some situations will put your anxiety through the roof which in turn causes weird symptoms and horrible thoughts. See you doctor and explain how you are feeling, there is help out there and you will get support on here with other sufferers good luck with your exams honey love paige
Hiya mate.
From what you have described it sounds like an anxiety disorder and your having anxiety symptoms and then in turn you have a panic attack when the anxiety overwhelms you. Get back to your GP and explain exactly all of the symptoms as you did in your post on here. It may help you to read this bit of the site too http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/NMPcms.php?nmppage=symptoms It explains whats happening with your body and why the symptoms occur and how to ease them. Chest palpultations and short breathing are very comon symptoms, if not the most sommon symptoms people get with this. But i would still get into a GP and ask if it could be down to anxiety and also ask for an ECG just to put your mind at rest.
And if you need any help and support, this sites a god send.
All the best
Ken
Dublin_Man
09-01-09, 10:19
im feeling like this now in work
trying to distract myself , but i have swallowing sensations , like a really tight throat and doesnt help when u have a chest infection etc
You're not dying. Trust me I've been through the EXACT situation you're describing. I've even driven myself to the hospital.
It's all in your head. The key is to realize that there isn't anything wrong with you. Your best bet is to go to the doctor and get it all checked out. I did and it made me feel so much better. He also prescribed me some meds to gently squash the symptoms you described.
You will be OK. Anxiety and Panic is perfectly normal that we all experience. The key is how you deal with it.
Good luck to you, you're in the right place. I just found this site, and to read that there are others that suffer what I suffer.....helps my anxiety to no ends...
We will overcome!
Lily! (lovely name!)
I'm 21 and I have the exact same problems, I'm always thinking I'm going to die, every little thing I notice wrong with me, I can have a saw arm and imagine up some crazy story about what it is and why it will kill me. I've been doing this for many years... I've got every illness in the book in my imagination! But I am still here and I assure you it is just your anxity getting the better of you! The sooner you know this the better you'll feel!
I also have a very hard time sleeping and I often wake up, short of breath and panicy, it makes me feel crazy too!
Death is a strange subject for me, I'm not religious at all, their are to many faiths for me to accept just one, but I don't really worry about it. I don't think we can tell what is coming after death but if people with near death experiences are to be believed there is somthing and it's good!
That said, I don't know what to believe and I don't trouble myself with it, I think there is just as much chance of there being something as there isnt and worry isnt going to change anything so it isnt worth it.
hiya i went thru this when i was at uni panicking i fought and fought and kept on going in no matter how bad i got. i got a 2.1 in the end. im now experiencing panic again at 27 and keep feeling so poo with excess acid and ibs also just had pleurisy which threw my phycotics into thinking im ill im going to die too its so hard i know. keep on fighting youll get there.
im feeling like this now in work
trying to distract myself , but i have swallowing sensations , like a really tight throat and doesnt help when u have a chest infection etc
I have felt that way too. Like I'm being smothered or sufficated.
Not believing in anything I just sit,
listening to my breathing
After thirty years
It still goes in and out.
Albert Coelho
On a practical level you need to read the symptoms on this site (or others) of both Stress and Panic Attacks. This may help you to recognise your symptoms - other than the initial and overall fear of dying - as being those of stress and/or panic.
When we are stressed and/or anxious it is very common to have a tight chest and/or a tight throat. This is obvious annoying and in an anxious person frightening. BUT it is 99% of the time just a symptom of our anxiety/stress/fear/panic. The big problem for some of us is that we become more scared of these symptoms than we are of the original fear/anxiety/stressful situation and BOOM - we experience a panic attack. The symptoms cause more fear/stress/anxiety which causes more physical symptoms (and more awareness of them) and that causes more... That's why (in my opinion) there is a huge difference between an "Attack of Panic" and a panic attack.
What you describe is now borderline between the two. At the moment its a severe attack of panic and/or stress when you become alarmed by your breathing or heart rate. BUT you sound very close to a panic attack.
From what you write the underlying anxiety is your fear of death. As another poster said you might wait a very long time for IT to catch up with you. My parents have lived into their 80s and were born into poverty shortly after the First World War and lived through the Second. They battled many illnesses since the 1970s. Death can strike suddenly BUT equally it can miss the individual for a long long time.
Its possible that some other underlying stress or anxiety has agrivated things for you, - such as your exams - but that's also the sort of glib tie-in the health services like. Your writing focuses on your fear of dying not a fear of failing (exams).
As you have suffered the fear of your slow or fast heartbeat for quite a while it is fairly unlikely that you have a problem going on there. You also have not collapsed or anything (it seems) which would also be symptoms of a real physical issue. As one book said: no-one dies of a panic attack, they just think they will - many, many times. If you were right then it'd all have been over by now.
You probably need to seek some sort of counselling. Your doctor might refer you or you can obtain CBT or other therapy yourself (especailly if you can afford it). Ideally you need to talk to someone (atleast) about it. That might be family, a friend or online. Given its a fear of death you might even talk to a religious person - not to adopt/accept their faith - but to get some perspective on the whole life/death thing.
Keep posting - if you want more talk.
I go through that all the time, some days are better then others. I find that people who don't have anixitey or know that much about it are not any help or don't understand. I find myself I will have to always find something to worry about my health mostly. I never used to be this bad. I am so tired of being on edge about an illienss that I think that I might have. I miss work over it my friends and family are tired of hearing about it as well. I just want to be worry free. I do suggest reading the symptoms of anxitey, it helps sooo much! Take care and happy thoughts!
Tinker28
I get this ALOT, trust me I kw where your coming from, Im obsessed with dying and losing either myself or loved ones, the way Ive been combatting it lately is a) telling myself, its all ok, and that the symptoms are just those of a panic attack, b) telling myself that even if I were dying, theres no point panicing because that wont help anyway, your not mad, or anything like that, I see alot of people get this fear of death thing on here, but remember panic attacks bring on all sorts of weird physical and psychological side effects, but none of them will kill you
best wishes
Andrew:)
OK . I used to be obsessed with Sex. I like most men could not think of much else until anxiety raised its head and I realised my mortality and then all I think about is dying. Quite ironic really from Life to death in two weeks. Now Sex is such a small part of my life and Death has totally consumed me. Sometimes I feel like "just bring it on then" but then I realise I have kids who need me and I can scare myself silly thinking how there lives would change if Me or my wife were not here.
Is ther no end to this suffering??
So don't worry your not by yourself. Study death and how fragile life really is. I mean study hard facts not superstitious mumbo jumbo. I did and I feel closer to death but strangely relived that it is so close. I feel quite uplifted at the fact that we are lucky to be here at all.
I meditate daily on Death and turn it into something that I do not push out of the way. People think its unhealthy but I think ignoring it is unhealthy it is part of being alive. We cannot be born unless we die.
Good luck
Mee
looking4answers
01-11-09, 00:33
Im 55 and when I was in my early 20's I felt exactly as you said you felt. I think in your life anxiety and changes in your chemical makeup forces your body to experience what you are right now. It starts in the 20's and then subsides and then comes back briefly in the 30's and then goes away and then the 40's and it goes away a little easier.. and when you hit your 50's then it can either go away for good or it can linger..since im 55 now.. Im not sure what it will do to me in the future..
When you are in your 50's you have done so many things.. that you feel if you die then well much of your life is over with anyway but its not that we are in a hurry to go.. its just more likely.. I read so many people's post on here about being in the 20's and I think much of it is caused by coming to realize your mortality and the fact that you have families to raise ,bills to pay and the future is uncertain.
In these days with things going on so radical its easy to become scared and worried about the future.. but even with me having probably over half of my life over with. I don't want to die either so I worry too..I suppose it really depends on how you feel..Anxiety is a terrible ordeal but it can be put away in the background and you can keep it at bay.. It will probably subside and you will be able to handle everything but you will always have to work at keeping it at bay.. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make all the fear disappear but im working on my own fears.. But you will beat it and you will be your old self again but it just takes persistence.. Im sure you have many
many years of good health and life ahead of you .When you start feeling like what you said just try to think positive things.
I wish I could have something better to say here but just wanted you to know you are not alone. I read one time that 85 percent of the worlds population wakes up feeling just as you say you do everyday..
Hi - i feel the exact same way! I go through phases of checking my temperature all the time and counting my heart rate and constantly think of whats happening inside my body. I get so scared and anxious that i wont go to bed in fear of going to sleep and not waking up! i read thorugh books and search the internet and convince myself i have everything i've read up on.
I also think about death a lot and i think this is what can sometimes trigger my panick attacks.
Its not a nice thing to think about and because you dont know what happens after you fear it even more.
You're really not alone in how you are feeling, i went to see my GP because i just could not cope with the feelings i was having and how much it was taking over my life.
I've been referred for CBT (not started having it yet) and im hoping this will help.
I know its so hard and it really does make you feel so low and sick with worry - but please remember you are not alone in how your feeling. as hard as it is, try to replace your negative thoughts with positive ones.. good luck and i really hope you overcome this, which im sure you will but it just takes time x
Hello Lily,
I have been feeling the same since i had my panic attacks 2 years ago. Until now, i feel im going to die today, if not then tomorrow. I'm 27 and i am suffering this thing with palpitations and drop down beat which i feel my heart will stop! Everyday i have this feeling, and i really got sick of it. But all i know is to fight these thoughts and block them from coming to my head as much as i can! And i know that i will be fine and i know i will die one day so i dont wanna be worried so much about it. All i want is to live for long...THATS WHAT WE ALL WANT....but just fight as long as your powers can assist you!!
With all my love,,,
Ahmed
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