The Results

[lamentinglaura]

HA has run my life since August, actually it's run my life since my teens but since this summer I've been a basket case. It started when I found a small swollen lymph node near my collar bone. I was convinced that it was cancer that had spread from somewhere in my body. I had a mammogram done because I was sure that I had breast cancer ... the mammogram was clear. I had a chest x-ray done ... the x-ray was clear. I had a CT scan of my neck ... the scan showed swollen lymph nodes but the report said there was no pathology. I was a nervous wreck because the node wasn't going down. I then became convinced that I must have cancer in my throat or tonsil because I had chronic pain there. I asked my doctor to refer me to an ENT specialist which she did. I basically spent my time in a state of terror, sure I was full of cancer and was about to die. I saw the ENT this past Tuesday and he said that there was nothing wrong .... no infection, no absess, no tumor. He told me to gargle with salt and water. On top of this I was convinced that I had lung cancer due to chest symptoms I was having for the past year. My doctor ordered a CT scan of my chest. I was 100% sure they'd find cancer. Well, I just got the results today ... the report said that my lungs were clear and nothing was wrong.

I'm sick and tired of HA having such control over my life. I've spent months in absolute terror of the unknown. I literally would become paralyzed ... unable to function at all. I had to call into work sick today because my nerves were so shot. I'm due to start CBT this month and I hope to hell it works because I can't go on living like this. The symptoms I experience are very real but I always think the worst and have myself buried. As for the lymph node that triggered this episode ... it disappeared! I need help in the worst way.

[daisy76]

Hi

I know exactly what u mean, if u have time read my thead in succss stories - i not been doctors for 3 months.
I am still fighting my HA and still have my moments but i hope u find some peace with CBT, it worked wonders for me.

Take care hun and i am so pleasd ur results were clear.

Daisy :flowers:

[Vanilla Sky]

Hi there, yes i know excactly where your coming from, HA is ruining my life as well you will get advice and support on here with your fellow sufferers! Good luck with CBT think il have to get some, i have to do something, maybe see you in chat sometime love paige x

[pedropanic]

Hey you sound like me! I once has a swollen lymph node in my neck and broke out into a cold sweat and couldn't sleep for 3 days waiting for the doctor to tell me I had The Dreaded.......of course I didn't. My main fear is my heart because it went nuts during my first panic attack, which started my health anxiety.

Relax and enjoy your upcoming CBT, it is very likely it will help. What I found most helpful were the books by Dr Claire Weekes, available in the online store here. They taught me to stop fighting and resisting my anxiety; to accept it and go with it, which calms your nerves and allows you to gain perspective.

Clearly from your tests you're very healthy. If you can let the worrying thoughts about your health come and go without paying them much attention you will begin to see how unimportant your thoughts and physical symptoms are.

Nothing controls your life except you; your health anxiety is just along for the ride temporarily. It will pass, it always does :)

[hm1177]

It was swollen lymph nodes that started my HA off! Still swollen 18 months on but because I had them very thoroughly checked out I no longer worry about them. A hundred other conditions bother me but not anything to do with swollen lymph nodes! I tried 5 htp yesterday for the first time yesterday and feel strangely calm today - maybe worth a try? otherwise good luck with the cbt

[Quintessence]

I know exactly what you're going through. I do this all the time - currently it's a noise in my ears which must be a brain tumour. I have freaked out about lymph nodes in the past - once I found one in my neck that seemed hardened, and the doctor sent me for a biopsy for my peace of mind, and at the biopsy they said that the node was too small to biopsy properly! Of course it proved to be nothing, except that the node swelled up after they had probed it with the needle.

But this is kind of beside the point: the point is your anxiety. I really wish you well and hope CBT offers you a way out of this vicious cycle. It's very tiring and unpleasant - in fact, the way I think of it now, it's a WASTE OF LIFE!!! I just wish I could stop myself doing it.

Good luck!

[lamentinglaura]

Thank God there's this forum. I don't think anyone who doesn't suffer from HA understands how this affects a person's life. I thought I was all alone in my struggle until I found this place. To know that others know exactly what you're talking about is comforting.

I don't know if CBT is going to help me or not. I read a book on it a number of years ago but it didn't really change my way of thinking. Maybe the homework they give will be useful. Oh well, I'm going into it with an open mind, all I can do is try it and see how it goes.

[Lissy43]

I have suffered HA since I was 19 when living at home with my parents in a very unhappy home. When I moved out at 20 I felt fine, no HA until I had my 2nd child and I suffered post natal depression, when my son was 7 months old I had a misscarage and since then HA has hit big time.

I have seen a psycologist and currently having CBT, last session next week. It does help so think ++

Its hard to live with, I do think every single day that I am wasting my life and I hate living this way, its so difficult but the CBT helps you to get stronger and tackle it and get to the root of the cause, I know it did for me.

I get swollen glands all of the time, in the past I have freaked out and gone back to the GP time and time again convinced I had cancer but I didn't have anything more than blood tests and I put faith in my GP, I trust him now and I only go to the GP now if I do actually feel ill rather than running there at the drop of a hat.

You have had so many tests, you are fine. If your blood tests were normal you should deffinatly not be concerned about cancer.

Good luck.

[sunshine-lady]

I don't suffer with health anxiety and can only imagine what impact it must have on your life. So pleased to hear that you have been given the all clear with your test and hopefully this will reassure you.

I am currently having CBT which is helping me with my issues, I am sure it will help you too as it challenges the way we think.

Good luck