phil06
12-01-09, 23:09
Does anybody get this? I am paranoid that people are watching, looking at me, or thinking bad things about me.
It's horrible my obsessive thoughts make me pick out words and I become paranoid it's meant for me. I just feel uncomfortable in my own skin. I end up needing to know what everybody is saying and I study the body language now. I now believe people have seen my negative thoughts and think its the real me. I feel I don't trust my own judgement anymore. How extreme can the negative thoughts get?
I'd like to think I can find the real me again but some thoughts are just so troubling and disturbing to handle. The HOCD ones just won't vanish and I am still scared of getting manic depression.
Like at work I feel I can be non anxious for say 1 minute and sometimes half an hour. I am just so convinced its real. I know someone on here said about having a worry time but I have tried to block the thoughts out most I went was three days, and it worked but my mind eventually gave in and I went back to the negative pattern.
I think the root of the problem is fear, then thoughts, then more fear the obsessions and compulsions. I'm just struggling bad to get over this as hard as I try. I feel it is getting in the way of my every day life. The perfection thing I refuse to buy a touch screen phone or a wii/or some clothes as I feel it's not man enough due to very bad HOCD.
I feel like somebody has put a curtain over my mind and put all this anxiety in it's place. When the thoughts come "I have no clear head" the thoughts some how make me fear and worry. They seem like they are real when I know they are not. It's like you eventually accept them and keep fighting it's horrible. I feel now what is it going to be next week? I have tired talking to a therapist before which helped physical symptoms they are more in control but I need some steps that will help get over them. Can anybody give me advice on successful ways or tasks I can do to get over these thoughts? Is it possible to clear my head? Will I feel how I use to before the negative thoughts came? :doh: :weep:
It's horrible my obsessive thoughts make me pick out words and I become paranoid it's meant for me. I just feel uncomfortable in my own skin. I end up needing to know what everybody is saying and I study the body language now. I now believe people have seen my negative thoughts and think its the real me. I feel I don't trust my own judgement anymore. How extreme can the negative thoughts get?
I'd like to think I can find the real me again but some thoughts are just so troubling and disturbing to handle. The HOCD ones just won't vanish and I am still scared of getting manic depression.
Like at work I feel I can be non anxious for say 1 minute and sometimes half an hour. I am just so convinced its real. I know someone on here said about having a worry time but I have tried to block the thoughts out most I went was three days, and it worked but my mind eventually gave in and I went back to the negative pattern.
I think the root of the problem is fear, then thoughts, then more fear the obsessions and compulsions. I'm just struggling bad to get over this as hard as I try. I feel it is getting in the way of my every day life. The perfection thing I refuse to buy a touch screen phone or a wii/or some clothes as I feel it's not man enough due to very bad HOCD.
I feel like somebody has put a curtain over my mind and put all this anxiety in it's place. When the thoughts come "I have no clear head" the thoughts some how make me fear and worry. They seem like they are real when I know they are not. It's like you eventually accept them and keep fighting it's horrible. I feel now what is it going to be next week? I have tired talking to a therapist before which helped physical symptoms they are more in control but I need some steps that will help get over them. Can anybody give me advice on successful ways or tasks I can do to get over these thoughts? Is it possible to clear my head? Will I feel how I use to before the negative thoughts came? :doh: :weep: