PDA

View Full Version : It always comes back somehow!



micktheblade8
16-01-09, 02:20
Hi,

I havent been doing too badly recently. In actual fact, comparing to where I was on new years eve, 2009, the first 15 days or so havent been too bad!

I've gone back to college, pretty much enjoyed it, and whilst life hasnt been as good as I'd like, its been better than it was a good few months ago and I think I have progressed.

However, I dont know what it was, I was walking home from college and the anxiety came back on. In fact I even crossed the other side of the road to try and reduce the anxiety. I know this was the wrong thing to do now!

Ive been pretty much obsessing all evening long and now its really stuck in my mind. I do feel like a bad person once again, Im sure this will pass, it always comes and goes, its just Ive had a raelly good day at college and now I feel back to square one.

In addition, I watched a documentary on TV earlier about Paul Burrell, which was about his secrets and stuff like that, and I just felt really bad as Ive had a lot of bad thoughts this past year and nobody knows. It feels like Im hiding stuff from people and thats why I always tell my mum about it when its bad, as I need to get it out to someone, I just cant hold it in, its scary.

Will I ever get out of this? I know the only way to get out of this is to accept any bad thoughts that you get and just accept you are human and that everyone gets bad thoughts but non OCD sufferers do not attach any importance to them and move on with there day.

My problem is, when Im in a situation I feel uncomfortable with, I start obsessing and going over again and I know its not healthy, but still, its hard to get out of the habit.

Any words of advice or help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

Michael

P.S. Ive also been slightly nervous as I am going to Watford this saturday to watch my team Sheffield United play down at Vicarage Road with my friend. I have a ticket in away end and I have been obsessing a bit and worrying the coach may crash, always thinking of the worst eventuality. But the bad thoughts trouble me more!

Patty
16-01-09, 11:04
Hi Michael, :)

I am so pleased to hear that you have been feeling better. :yesyes:

I can understand what you mean when you say:


I just felt really bad as Ive had a lot of bad thoughts this past year and nobody knows. It feels like Im hiding stuff from people and thats why I always tell my mum about it when its bad...

I have felt like this many times myself. It is so good that you can talk about it to your mum. Sometimes we can be too hard on ourselves about thinking these thoughts - keep reminding yourself: 'I'm a good & caring person'.


You have totally got the right attitude here:


Will I ever get out of this? I know the only way to get out of this is to accept any bad thoughts that you get and just accept you are human and that everyone gets bad thoughts but non OCD sufferers do not attach any importance to them and move on with their day.



I also find that if I have to go somewhere (even if I really want to go) it can make anxiety stronger....thinking the worst thing that could happen. When it comes to having to go on the journey to get there I would listen to the radio or keep talking to someone and then there's no room to think about the negative thoughts.

I hope you really enjoy the game on Saturday. :yesyes:

Best wishes :)

purplehaze
16-01-09, 17:54
The main thing to keep in mind is the thoughts are just thoughts. And everyone (even those who dont have an emotional illness) have thoughts that creep into their head.

New mums have a fear they will hurt their baby but they dont,yet they obsess about it for awhile.

Sometimes if we can cope with the worst thought. You mention going to see your team and the coach crashing. Well the likely chance of that happening is very small.
Just keep working on the positive thoughts and remember that your not a bad person for having thoughts.

If you could take a walk inside others heads you would see we all have thoughts we dont want.

"we cant stop birds flying over our heads but we can stop them making nests in our head" which means, "we cant stop thoughts coming into our mind but we dont need to keep thinking about them"

Lets hope the team wins as I'm putting them on

All the best mate

kev x