Work making me feel worse.

[Cinders]

I have been signed off work for a week and was due back today but not gone in, i am back at the doctors on Monday as i have finally admitted that i need help and need someone to talk to.

Work called today to find out what is happening and when i am going back and they were so blunt with me that i have only just calmed down after speaking to them over an hour ago.

I now feel bad cause i am not there and that just makes me worse, they got me in this state and now i feel bad cause i am taking time off.

I don't know what to do i don't know what will calm me down as i cannot stop crying. I feel guilty for being ill. Last week they were very supportive now it is like i have had a week and they just want me back.

Please help me.


C x

[Trapped]

they have no idea have they?
I am glad you have decided to accept help, this is the hardest for me too, it's the moving to that stage....

[Smiley?]

The guilt is all part of it i'm afraid. I went back to work too quick and am paying the price now - have just been signed off again after only being back for about 3 weeks.

You've got to go back when you feel ready and with support. I had no support from work and that is probably why i'm off again now. They only seem to notice me when i'm off!!!

[mandie]

Hi

Sorry to hear u are getting no support from work.

I was signed off work in may 08 and am still off now. I struggled for ages with the anxiety until one day i could take it no more and went to my dr for help.

I have worked in my job for 7 years. Not one of my colleagues has contacted me to see how I am.

On the rare occasion i have called by at work to collect my wages, none of them speak to me.

One of the reasons my anxiety got so bad, was due to my pratice manager giving me a hard time, but the overall boss thinks im making a fuss about nothing.

They want me back but i no im not ready and my dr doesnt think im ready either.

Take all the time you need before going back. Maybe think about having some counselling.

Please pm me if you need to chat. I no how you feel

love mandie x

[jays]

Hi I do know how you are feeling - I have had 4 weeks off work so far and work have been great, really supportive but I am not sure how long they will be like that. As we all know our employers have a 'duty of care' to us but this isnt often portrayed well to us.
I tried going back to work and it made me far worse, daft thing was, I wanted to be there.
Please try and speak to your doctor about how this is making you feel, hopefully they will reassure you that you have to put yourself first and get yourself feeling better.
Feel free to contact me

[Dominic1975]

I feel for you..... whenever I need time off work, as I am feeling low, or tired or anxious..... I just cant do it, as I feel guilty for letting everyone down...

People at work know that I suffer from anxiety and I think they would be fully supportive, but in the back of your mind, you dont know how long that would last for.......

But all in all, I would say to anyone, if you need time out, and your doctor agree's, take it......... You have to do whats best for you!!

[rgb76]

Hi Cinders

I agree with the advice above.If you're feeling low is a week really long enough? Don't feel guilty for feeling ill and being off work. How would you respond if a colleague was off with similar symptoms to you..you'd understand. If people at work don't undertsand then it's their problem

keep in touch and let us know how its going..we're all here for you

take care rgb

[Cinders]

Well i am due back at the doctors tonight - i have stopped crying now, well most of the time anyway, unless something silly set me off so does this mean i am better?

I have continuous heartburn and don't know what to do with myself, over the weekend when my partner is home we do things and keep each other company so i do not feel too bad. I wake at night in a sweat with my heart beating so fast, and i feel so worried only i don't know what about. I have to almost talk to myself and tell my self to relax and lye down and take deep breaths. This works and i fall asleep quite quickly.

During the days i watch tv and i am fine then all of a sudden i am wondering around the house not knowing what to do with myself. I don't want to talk to anyone, only my famlily, i don't want to see or talk to work collegues i don't know why its just the way i feel.

I called me boss back on friday to apologise for still being off, i don't know why as i know it is works fault that i feel this way, he was OK, not great but ok and said that i can go back and do a different job for a few weeks to settle me back in, but i think the main thing is that he wants me a work and doesn't like the thought that they are paying me to be at home.

It would be different if i was in hospital, had an accident for example, but no one that has felt like this seems to understand it.

I cannot face work, the thought of if makes me feel sick, and i get myself in to a terrible state about how much work i am going to have when i get back, but will my doctor want to sign me off?

[Smiley?]

If you know it is work that is making you feel so bad then your doctor should be understanding enough to sign you off.

Your boss shouldn't have said "doesn't like the thought that they are paying me to be at home" that's just insensitive and if you have to be off to make yourself better then so be it.

I have felt the same as you. We'd feel less guilty being off if we had a broken leg!!

[Cinders]

Yes you are right, i broken bone, something that you can physically see would not be so bad but this is something that is so hard.

I just don't know how i am can forgive work as such for what they have done to me. I used to be strong and positive and lively and i just feel like i am in someone elses body and this is through all that was put upon me at work and led me to feel this way.