Am I weird??????

[karenb]

Hi there everyone,

This is gonna sound really silly - does anyone cope better when they are stressed?? See I told you it would sound silly!

When I am coping with various family issues - the panic seems to fade away. Is this because my attention is elsewhere? I am trying to work this one out.

Would appreciate someone elses view on this.

Thanks.

Karen xx

[Utility]

Hi

You hit the nail on the head and it is called "distraction". Very common method of trying to reduce the symptoms of anxiety. When your mind is on something else, like family issues, then you tend not to focus on feelings of anxiety and hey presto it goes away.

It is a very good way of proving to anxiety sufferers that there is nothing physicaly wrong with them. Doesn't work for everyone though, but used in tandem with other methods it can help to reduce anxiety.

[alias_kev]

Hi Karen

I think I posted about this in november. if not I guess I spoke to someone about it. My father died fairly suddenly in November and I had to organise 80% or so of the funeral, paperwork, etc and organise family gatherings to keep everyone informed about my Mum as she has quite severe alzheimers.

Anyway during that fortnight of (what I call) Active Stress my anxiety was low and my confidence high. I also dealt with lots of incoming phonecalls which are a phobia of mine at times. Even my general anxiety was pretty absent. I think there were three things involved:

1. I wasn't able (or expected) to do any stuff for myself or my normal responsibilities. That's probably the focus of most of my anxiety. So troublesome tasks were at a minimum.
2. The situation was mentally and physically busy. So all the key biological things are at a high helpful level - adrenalin, energy, tiredness.
3. (As Utility mentioned) Clearly this was a distraction from my own life. I think the more specific influences at (1) and (2) were more significant than pure distration value.
4. The situation had to be dealt with by someone and that someone appeared very firmly to be me. Thus the avoidance which is a natural consequence of anxiety (or frustration stress) could not be used.

PS: I think the other kind of stress, what I called frustration stress, is what we most often think of an unhealthy stress. Its when you are stuck in traffic, or have lost something, or hate your boss/job.

So you are not alone and its not really weird. Infact our (ab-)normal anxieties and fears are much more weird really.

[HighwayMiles]

I'm always better in a crisis than during regular boring life. My husband jokes that he could cure me by releasing a bear in the house once a day. Faced with an actual problem, I'm fine. I'm cool, calm, focused, non-emotional. I'm the one you want around in a crisis situation, as ridiculous as that sounds. But give me an ordinary Sunday morning and I'm a disaster!

I wonder if people like us were built for stress. Maybe we would have done great during the caveman days, fighting beasts and struggling for basic survival. That's what I tell myself anyway. It makes me feel like I'm a very capable person, just born in the wrong age. :)

I try to get my adrenalin rushing on a regular basis because I'm much better off when I do. I'm a stormchaser. I never feel any anxiety in the presence of tornadoes. I drive too fast. I used to bungy jump. Now I'm a parent and I don't take nearly as many risks as I used to because it's irresponsible, but I feel like I'm psychologically suffering as a result. I need that kind of fear to recalibrate, you know? My Psychiatrist doesn't seem to understand that. He thinks I just need a hobby like knitting or something. Hobbies are good, but I need something stronger. I hope to be really truly obnoxiously rich someday so I can pursue expensive thrills like racing in the Dakar Rally and skydiving.

So yeah, I agree. Stress, death, danger, crisis... as awful as they are sometimes, are good for me.

Just don't make me go to a kid's birthday party during flu season!

~Laura

[mandie]

Hi Karen

I was at my worst with anx and panic when my dad suddenly got ill and was diagnosed with cancer.

Alot of people were woried and thought i would get worse, but i was so busy worrying about him, my panic got pushed to the back and actually got better.

So it seems i cope better when there is a major thing going on but not in smaller less important matters.

love mandie

[*D*]

Hello,

Yes!! I am so much better in a crisis Like everyone hear has said it is the distraction, we are not thinking about ourselves. Its when we slow down and strat to over think everything is when we get into trouble.
So No you are not weird at all.

D

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

Oh so true! My boyfriend's asthma got really bad over a few days a couple of months ago, and eventually he was really struggling late at night, and he had to go to hospital. I was fine - no panic symptoms, nothing. I helped him through it and he said I was great.

But if I nick my finger or get a headache....forget it! I'm all over the place