Please help me

[serenity]

Hi, I am new here, have never posted although I have read the forums avidly for at least a month now, it is so much better than googling! LOL anyhow, you all seem very supportive and caring here and so I thought I would post my main problem to see if anyone can offer me any advice or similar experiences....

I have had anxiety for years, it started off as panic attacks then became general anxiety with panic attacks and of recent I have recognised that I have a health anxiety and that is my main issue..

Towards the end of last year I had quite a rough time, lots of extra stress and sickness with me and the children...I had been very stressed for quite some time..Then at the beginning of December everything seemed to be settling down but I noticed that the left side of my chest felt kind of 'full' as though I had pressure there...I would not say it was pain, it was more of a discomfort and I was very aware of it..this went on for about 4 days and the discomfort has been constant. At this stage I was assuming it was the left over anxiety and I went to the doctor to get it checked out and to reassure myself that it was anxiety. The doctor told me to go to emergency because they didn't have an ECG machine there so I got my mum to sit the children and went down to my local hospital emergency room. Had to wait a few hours as I was obviously not in significant distress and then they called me in. When I went in they hooked me up to the cardiac monitors etc and this ER doc came in and said that he had consulted with a colleague and they thought I might have full heart block which would explain my symptoms...At this stage I started really panicking as this was NOT what I had expected (I am 38 years old, female and am a smoker). My legs were shaking, I couldn't stop them and I was absolutely terrified, never been so scared in all my life...they were talking about a pacemaker and then gave me valium because they didn't want my heart going to fast and I was flipping out so much and they moved me to were they could see me all the time and gave me aspirin 'just in case'!! It makes me anxious just remembering it all! Anyhow, they admitted me overnight and took the bloods for heart attack etc 3 times over night and the next day they got me to do a stress test and the cardiologist came in and said all results had come back ok! I tried to ask about the so called heart block and they said that there was very minimal first degree heart block and it wasn't to worry about. I said to the cardiologist 'so this is not my heart?' and he said 'oh no, I am not saying that, the only way I could tell that is if we did a cardiac catheter and we wouldn't do that with you as there are risks involved with that procedure'. Well, that got me even more terrified even though my husband was there and he said that the cardiologist said that becasue he wanted me to quit smoking and to frighten me....They discharged me and that was that. I was in major panic by now, the discomfort was still there and I didn't understand how an ER doc could get the diagnosis so wrong. I went to see my GP and he spent a long time trying to reassure me and also sent me for an echocardiogram and pulmonary angiogram to check for blood clots. They both came back normal.

Anyhow....I still have the discomfort in the left chest area and about a month ago I started getting what I assume are ectopic beats which are totally freaking me out now. I don't know what this 'discomfort' is and it is there pretty much all the time...I have looked up costochondritis (which my doc suggested) but I don't have any very tender points when pressing on my rib cage or in between ribs...I am still not convinced it isn't my heart although my GP is - he says that sometimes we don't always get a definite diagnosis but I feel I need one...I need something to hang on to..I need to know what it is...I even wake up with this feeling and so if it was anxiety would I wake up with it even after being (presumably) relaxed overnight? and why the ectopics now? this discomfort has been there for nearly two months now and I have totally lost my confidence in this time...I am just so scared and not knowing is driving me insane. I don't really notice anything that makes it worse even though when I am emotionally upset it does seem to get worse, kind of painful twinges...

Sorry to go on like this, I guess I feel at my wits end with it all...My GP has pretty much said he doesn't know what else he can do and so I feel I cannot go to him for any sort of support. He has referred me to a general physician for an opinion and I have that appointment in about 3 weeks time.

If you have any advice or similar experiences please let me know...I am feeling quite desperate and find that I just need to go off by myself fairly frequently and cry and cry...my husband and children are tired of me not being myself and I don't blame them but I just don't know how to get past this...I try to hide my despair from my family as much as possible but I am not my usual happy self obviously :weep:

[Dominic1975]

You sound like you have gone through a lot!!!
I think I would be feelng like you, if I had been kept in hospital over night for a heart problem, then the next day it was all ok.... But I also know the pain I in the chest from anxiety and this maybe what is creating your pain... expecially as you are so worried about it
Sorry I cant be of much help, try to put your trust in the test you have had and hope it starts to get better soon

[AnnieMags]

Dear Serenity, I am not surprised you are feeling scared, but try to keep things in perspective. You have had three opinions so far, and you are understandably focussing on the first one, the one that scared you so much, and not the two following ones (GP examination and further diagnostic tests), that are much more positive.

The first ER team thought they were going to find a certain condition based on your symptoms. It is a pity that they even voiced their suspicions to you at that stage and did not wait for results. However, after exhaustive investigations and tests, they confirmed that the tests did not bear out their first suspicions. Your GP has carried out more tests and also been able to reassure you, but (like we all tend to do here, that's why we post on this forum! :blush: ) you are still focussing on that first, scary but WRONG, diagnosis.

You have been referred to a third specialist for further reassurance - try to put it out of your mind until you can see him in three weeks' time. Tell yourself that exhaustive tests have confirmed that you are well, but you have the safety net of a another specialist opinion in three weeks' time - you have not been left alone with this, you are still being followed up, and that in itself is reassuring.

You can be absolutely certain that if the tests you have had already had shown up anything worrying, you would not have your physician's appointment in three weeks' time, you would be in hospital now. However much the headlines would have us believe otherwise, doctors don't make mistakes that often, and you have not been seen by just one, but several, and had several diagnostic tests. They all say you have nothing to worry about.

The persisting symptoms are typical of health anxiety, when we are worried we feel every little twinge and flutter. I know how hard it is, believe me, but try to believe the specialist opinions you have had.

And - if you can possibly manage to quit smoking, you would be doing yourself a huge favour!

Best wishes from Annie

[Utility]

Hi,

AnnieMags has hit the nail on the head. You have focused on what the first doctor told you and tended to ignore the others. Your follow up results have come back fine and that is what you must take on board.

Have faith in the fact that if there was anything wrong then you would have know about it by now.

I was sent to accident and emergency about a year ago because of a suspected heart problem. During my stay I was checked out twice and everything came back as normal but because one of the doctor's made an off the cuff remark I became convinced they missed something. My anxiety took over and blew everything out of proportion. Even though I had further tests to prove everything was OK, I was still not happy. It wasn't until I accepted that this was all anxiety realted that things calmed down.

It is the same for you. Your GP has found nothing wrong, after doing futher tests, and in order to support this is sending you to a specialist. This specialist will find nothing wrong and will probably have a chat in order to ease your mind.

[NervousNellie]

Hi Serenity,

I know exactly how you feel - I'm going through the same thing right now!! Back in October, I went to see my GP for a sinus infection and ended up being taken to the hospital by ambulance from his office! When the nurse did my BP and pulse check, she felt a skipped beat and pulled out the ekg machine. Well that was it for me....I ended up in a full panic attack with my heart rate at 150! So off to the hospital I went, even though my doctor was assuring me the whole time that the ekg was normal, except for a fast heart rate. They just wanted to make sure that everything was OK. The cardiologist that he consulted with wanted me to get an echo done, so I was sent to the hospital. The paramedic in the ambulance showed me the ekg at the doctor's office and said that there was a little blip in my ekg and that's why I was being sent to the hospital. So the doctor tells me that everything was normal, except for the fast heart rate and the paramedic says that the ekg was abnormal and that's why I was being sent to the hospital. So who am I supposed to believe???????? Was it normal or not??????

Well after being on the cardiac monitor for 5 hours and having 3 ekg's, a chest x-ray and 2 sets of bloodwork, I was sent home with a diagnosis of anxiety. The thing that bothered me was that one of my ekg's came back abnormal. It was done by a medical student - while he was performing the test, I moved and he said "sit still", but continued to run the test even though I moved. I also had a massive skipped beat when he ran the ekg. Here's where my problem comes in. When the ER doctor told me that my 2nd ekg was abnormal, my husband asked him what would cause that. The ER doc told us it was a lack of oxygen to the heart which would indicate coronary artery disease!!!! However he couldn't understand how that was possible when he said that my bloodwork was the most perfect set of bloodwork that he's ever seen! He thought that somebody messed up the results because he'd never seen such great cardiac bloodwork results, that he had them draw blood and run the tests again. And those came out the same way!!! He seemed really puzzled, so I told the ER doc that I had been to a cardiologist 9 months prior and the cardiologist told me that all of my symptoms were not cardiac related - he ran all of the tests (echo, ekg, holter monitor, bloodwork). He also told me not to come back as there was no need for any further testing, my heart is fine. The ER doc wanted to keep me overnight to do a stress test (which I've never had done), but once I told him what the cardiologist said, he told the nurse to run another ekg and if that came out normal then I could go home. So the nurse went to do the 3rd ekg and noticed that one of my little sticky things that they connect the leads to was peeling off. She took that one off and put on a new one and ran the ekg - perfect results! They discharged me with a dose of xanax in my system and told me not to worry about my heart, but to get the anxiety under control.

So basically, to make a very long story short, even though they told me that my heart is fine, I still worry that the abnormality that they caught on the ekg was actually that huge skipped beat and there really is a problem and I have heart disease!! I don't focus on the fact that a student ran the test and there were several factors that could have caused the abnormal result - (the sticky thing that wasn't on right and me moving around while he was running the test). I haven't been back to the doctor's since that incident, but the hospital told me that I wouldn't need any further testing on this issue. So I just don't know what to do or what to believe. Was something wrong or was it not??? Just walking into a doctor's office makes me panic and I'm afraid that this will start the whole cycle over. So I'm trying to trust all of the doctors and trying to believe that they know what they're doing, but I know how hard it is.

By the way, I'm only 30 years old. I just turned 30 in September.....so you're not alone on this one!! Doctors in the US just don't have a clue about anxiety and focus everything onto the heart. That's why I have HA in the first place - the doctors started it!!!

[serenity]

thank you for your replies, they have eased my worry somewhat and I know that I focused on the hospital visit more than anything. It really started my health anxiety to be honest! However, even if he was trying to frighten me about quitting smoking as my husband suggested, I do find the comment the cardiologist made to me prior to discharge (oh no I'm not saying the problem is not your heart) really worrying. We do focus on only the negative and another anxious person understands that so thank you for pointing out to me that I am doing just this. Also, is it possible to get pain only on one side of your chest (that pressure, full feeling) just around your heart from anxiety? I had thought that anxiety chest pain was more a quick, sharp stabbing kind of pain where as mine is constant... and I also wonder why the skipped heart beats started more recently...I didn't have any of those when I was on the cardiac monitor o/night so they haven't really been checked out, they started about a month after the event (I was so terrified in Hospital I would expect them to start then!) and I mentioned them to my GP but he didn't really take much notice..I get them everyday and sometimes as many as a hundred or so a day...I don't take my pulse so as to focus too much on it but I am aware of them very much so.

I would love to quit smoking and tried to much of last year but at the moment I don't think I have the fight in me for that, I am just too anxious and was hoping I would be able to 'get back to normal' regarding all this heart stuff before tackling that one...

Nellie, my heart goes out to you, what a story, you have been through a lot and my HA (this current episode anyhow) was also caused by the doctors ,certainly that hospital visit. My GP is mainly good with my anxiety and I am never too bothersome to him but he made me worse too the last time I saw him as he was kind of dismissive and that has made me feel even more alone. My husband has no idea how to deal with me, as I said I don't go on about it all the time, try to put on a brave face but when he does talk about it he makes me feel really silly. So, I tend to try and hide away from them all at times (difficult because through all this the children have been on school holidays) and let it all out with tears which is helpful some but I do feel awfully lonely in this situation.

It is so nice to be able to come here for advice and support and I thank you very much. :)