Anybody out there like this...?

[rgb76]

Hi- thought I'd post this separately, I have been off work 3 weeks and have a week to go before I am due to return to work

I feel that I have had anxiety-GAD for a long time and have managed to keep it under control until recently. I have an Occ. Health appt next Monday and just hope I feel able to return to work. I am Manager and my line manager is also someone who is relentless with the workload and says we will always be 'busy' and said to me that the 'job won't go away'...very helpful when I'm struggling to cope with work!

Anyhow, I am just starting a computer CBT course which means I will have to face my fears but when...? I will have to be as honest as I can with my boss. I have told my boss it is the workload and although she has been dismissive in her approach I will be telling Occ health this and my GP said that they will have to change something at work in order for me to return...that the problem is 'theirs not mine.'

I do feel so guilty for being off but at the moment feel awful thinking of going back to work...hope these feelings pass :scared15:

I want to return to work and be 'normal' but I don't feel 'normal' at the moment even though by returning to work and doing some of the day-to-day things this may help improve my self-esteem and therefore lift the depression and anxiety.

Another part of me doesn't feel ready to go back to work and feels even further from it as what if I freak out-I am having difficulty with meetings at the moment. I am reading some self-help books and it seems to me that we have to tackle our fears daily by not doing something for more than a few days this can lead to more anxiety but the energy required to do this...hope I feel more confident soon:scared15: :grouphug:

Please let me know your thoughts and experiences

Many thanks

rgb

[pink]

hi rgb,
know exactly what you mean, have been off work for past 6 wks and my docs signed me off for another 8 wks, she says I'm not ready to go back and has arranged some counselling for me, I too have gone down the occ health route as well. Are you on any anti depressants? I'm on citalopram, afraid still waiting for them to start to work though. I too am suffering with anxiety and depression and I feel like have been suffering badly with anxiety all my life, have managed to put a face on it for so long but just can't do it at the minute, plus if I'm honest I don't want to either, tired of living like this. My work haven't been very understanding either, but I know that you've got to put yourself first, its not easy when you feel like this, still struggling with it all, am always here if you want to chat
pink xxxxxxxxx

[rgb76]

Hi Pink

Thanks, yes, I'm on Citalopram 10mg- have been on for 3 weeks. I went up to 20mg but my heart was pounding so have reduced to 10mg- has made a slight difference/improvement but if I don't feel any further improvement may need to go up to 20mg. l


hi rgb,
know exactly what you mean, have been off work for past 6 wks and my docs signed me off for another 8 wks, she says I'm not ready to go back and has arranged some counselling for me, I too have gone down the occ health route as well. Are you on any anti depressants? I'm on citalopram, afraid still waiting for them to start to work though. I too am suffering with anxiety and depression and I feel like have been suffering badly with anxiety all my life, have managed to put a face on it for so long but just can't do it at the minute, plus if I'm honest I don't want to either, tired of living like this. My work haven't been very understanding either, but I know that you've got to put yourself first, its not easy when you feel like this, still struggling with it all, am always here if you want to chat
pink xxxxxxxxx

[rgb76]

I hit a button and sent the message before I finished it! I was going to say that it really is awful to be like this-trapped in these thoughts and this site has been great to share and know that I am not the only one

cheers:yesyes:

roo/ rgb76