How am I supposed to manage day-to-day?

[nikkipops]

I'm in need of a bit of advice, I've been struggling for a couple of years with panic and anxiety. I was terrible with it when I first went to uni last September, but going back this year was much easier. I felt like I was getting better, and I was far less depressed with more to look forward to and a better attitude towards everything going on with my life, I was feeling good about my course, and I'd just moved in with my boyfriend. I'm far worse than I've been for a long time, at the moment, and I feel like it has a lot to do with being raped during a panic attack just outside my flat a couple of months ago.

I worry all the time about being on my own, whether I'm out or in the house. I can't sleep for nightmares and waking up with panic attacks. I worry about going out and being in put in a situation where someone notices I'm particularly vulnerable. I find it hard to concentrate on anything or manage everyday activities. I haven't been able to tell anyone other than my boyfriend about what happened to me, and I'm not how much good it would do me to talk about it with people who might judge me or worry about me. I hate feeling like I shouldn't trust anyone, and I hate being exhausted thinking about something that should never have happened.

Any advice would be very much appreciated.

Nikki

[ade]

dear Nikki
i am so sorry to hear of your problems and the recent terrible trauma you suffered.May i ask have you spoken to anyone about this,having been raped as a child i know full well that it takes time and care to get through it.I think you must give yourself time and space to recover,i am a man so maybe you wouldnt want to disclose things to me but i really do urge you not to underestimate the trauma you have so wrongly suffered.honey,no one will hate you for what you may tell them,please,reach out and im sure you will get the tlc that you need
please take care,thinking of you,
an ocean of love ade xxxxx:flowers:

[Mully]

Hi Nikki

I can understand your fears, but would urge you to talk to somebody. This is not something you can deal with yourself, however much you feel you can or have too.. you don't have to deal with this alone.

You can talk to your GP or if you want to stay anonymous then ring the Samaritans ..they are very good. Just being able to open up to someone will be a great relief to you.

It was awful what happened to you.. IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT ... YOUR WERE NOT TO BLAME .. NO ONE WILL JUDGE YOU.

I have never been raped.. but I have been sexually abused as a child..and someone did try to rape me once, but I fought back. I may not fully understand how you feel but if you want to talk to someone, without at face, who will not judge you then please, by all means pm me.

Please, try and get help.. it is out there for you to take.

Gentle Huggles xx

[paulskin]

you say that you cant talk to anyone else about your trauma,well you have taken a first big step by mentioning it on a public forum,sometimes its easier to talk about things to somebody you dont know.lots of people would be here and open for a chat. good luck and take care x

[tonk]

Dear Niki pops, I am so sorry to hear that your suffering so much. I to was raped and this has been the cause of my post traumatic stress disorder. My abuse was from a young age, but one od the biggest things was every time it happened i would have a panic attack. I am now seeing a psychologist to try and work through the anxiety. Its not easy, but it is possible. I would urg you to tell your gp or cpn id you have one. They can give you some practical advice on how to manage the panic. For me hiding what had happened just increased the fear and the amount of times the panic set in, i can be doing nothing and suddenly i have a panic attack. Facing the fear of a panic attack and your rape experience is a very difficult thing to do, but if you get the right support to share this, it may ease some of your symptoms. Good luck hon:) tonk