Forget the world

[Bill]

I was talking to an elderly friend today. He used to be a fighter pilot. I was telling him what I've been through because of my wifes illness and how the constant stress affected me. He surprised me by saying he admired me but I replied No, don't admire me...no one should!!! If anyone should be admired it should be him for the job he used to do and the terrible things he saw.

I then showed him my scars and told him about my od's. I told him I only had myself to blame because I trapped myself. He still thought highly of me. I feel though that understanding anxiety can be a double edged sword - Either someone can think lowly or highly of us because they don't understand anxiety. In his eyes perhaps he views me as being noble for putting up with my wifes illness but in my eyes I view myself as weak due to my fear of being alone because a normal person would have left years ago. In fact the other day she told me she'd od if I wasn't around and I know she'd go through with it because of her illness.

Anyway, this friend proved to me that there is always someone somewhere who will listen, who won't judge, who will understand...and to me he seemed unlikely to be such a person due to his background as he must be mentally a much stronger person than me.:hugs:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5syio706thg

[mf]

I think that most people fear being alone Bill and i do not think that its a weakness,lots of people stay together in not particularly good relationships because to them its preferable to being alone..

It is surprising sometimes how the most unexpected and unlikely people can be so understanding and sympathetic and then there are others who have no comprehension of anxiety/depression etc and therefore appear very uncaring and intolerant..Your friend sounds like a fascinating man and with the experiences that he must have had as a fighter pilot, he must know better than most what stress feels like,just because your and our stress is different does not make it any less painful or difficult for us, and he is obviously wise and understanding enough to recognize that and that makes him a special person that has been capable of extraordinary things..

I too think that there are an awful lot of people that must be mentally stronger than me, but i wonder if they just hide it well or somehow manage it better..

[marie1974]

there are some people who will listen and never judge and actually understand i know 1 or 2 and im grateful to have them in my life.

hugs bills xxx

[sunshine-lady]

Your friend sounds like a wonderful gentleman who, like yourself, has been through so much and you are both very caring people. I am not sure if you can compare mental strengths, you both have been through what most people don't have to expierence in their lives.
I think going through tough times gives us the empathy to understand other peoples issues.
take care
ps loved the link xxx