Sax
20-07-05, 08:50
:( I really don't know if this feeling is justified but i feel really betrayed by a friend of mine.
When I first starting talking to her (she also suffers with depression) she was totally and utterly there for me whenever I needed her. It was her that got me to open up to her, to recognise I needed to go to the Gp and really admit that just maybe I was depressed.
However, having opened up all these feelings and thoughts she's now got too much going on in her own life and seems to have abandoned me.
I suppose i just relied upon her too much. I use to chat to her every evening and text her and even speak to her on the phone - which is a bit of a no no with me!![:O]
I feel so exposed of my feelings but feel angry :( that she keeps intermittenly contacting and saying everything which is happening to her good and bad but doesn't ever really ask about how I feel anymore. I feel let down but maybe i am just being too self absorbing feeling like this. I am trying to bottle up with her and just be there for her if she needs me however this seems pretty one way after all we went through just a few weeks ago!
I am very grateful for the support of this site but still feel so let down that my so called friend has left me fight at what I call quite a critical time on my own.
When I say critical I just feel this is a turning point that I either sink further or I try my hardest to pull myself up - which I admit I am struggling doing. i know I am to expect good and bad days but they seem so extreme - good days i don't feel depressed, just unmotivated but bad days I feel so so low - a feeling I really can't handle very well.
I just feel maybe by letting out this feeling of betrayal here that it may help me to let it go and move on rather than keep wishing i'd not opened up at all to anyone and exposed myself like this. I sort of feel maybe I'd be in a better position if the feelings were all still inside I was just managing as I was before and getting on with life instead of feeling in limbo all the time.
I hope this doesn't all sound too selfish feeling like this!
Sax
When I first starting talking to her (she also suffers with depression) she was totally and utterly there for me whenever I needed her. It was her that got me to open up to her, to recognise I needed to go to the Gp and really admit that just maybe I was depressed.
However, having opened up all these feelings and thoughts she's now got too much going on in her own life and seems to have abandoned me.
I suppose i just relied upon her too much. I use to chat to her every evening and text her and even speak to her on the phone - which is a bit of a no no with me!![:O]
I feel so exposed of my feelings but feel angry :( that she keeps intermittenly contacting and saying everything which is happening to her good and bad but doesn't ever really ask about how I feel anymore. I feel let down but maybe i am just being too self absorbing feeling like this. I am trying to bottle up with her and just be there for her if she needs me however this seems pretty one way after all we went through just a few weeks ago!
I am very grateful for the support of this site but still feel so let down that my so called friend has left me fight at what I call quite a critical time on my own.
When I say critical I just feel this is a turning point that I either sink further or I try my hardest to pull myself up - which I admit I am struggling doing. i know I am to expect good and bad days but they seem so extreme - good days i don't feel depressed, just unmotivated but bad days I feel so so low - a feeling I really can't handle very well.
I just feel maybe by letting out this feeling of betrayal here that it may help me to let it go and move on rather than keep wishing i'd not opened up at all to anyone and exposed myself like this. I sort of feel maybe I'd be in a better position if the feelings were all still inside I was just managing as I was before and getting on with life instead of feeling in limbo all the time.
I hope this doesn't all sound too selfish feeling like this!
Sax