View Full Version : Annoyed with myself
I was just looking at all your photos and your meet ups. I would love to meet up with you all, but I feel im not good enough. Deep down I know im just the same, but I cant get over this feeling of not fitting in and not knowing what to say. I also feel I will be judged. Its really getting to me, as I really want to meet you. Has anyone any ideas on how I can get passed ths please.
You could all be good friends to me and me to you in return, but I cant bring myself to do it?
Is this a social anxiety? General anxiety? Or lack of confidence? If I have an idea as to what it is and why I feel like it may help me a bit.
I have a car, I love driving, I have a wonderful husband. So I have no excuse really to meet you all.
Sorry about the babble, but I want/need some help in making friends :(
xxxxx
Feel free to PM me, if you want to talk.
Emma xx
Keep focused, keep positive.
Hi Emma,
It sounds as if you just lack confidence, which can give you a social phobia, you can pm me any time, and i have sent you a pm with my msn so if you have it we can chat on there, it is so easy to make friends on here every one is so lovely and the fact that you can get to know one another by messages first really helps, come into the chat room one night, normally busy after 9pm everyone is great in there and you will be made to feel so welcome, and it is a great way to make friends
Take Care
Trac:D
its "just a thought"
Hi Emma,
I understand it can get difficult.
Please don't ever think you don't fit in or your not good enough cause you DEFINATELY are!!!!!!!
You will get there in the end.
Please feel free to PM me or e-mail me Emma. I'd love to hear from you.
Take care,
Love PIP'S XX
Hi Emma,
I totally understand where your coming from, Ive got a lovely family & faince but im terrible making new friends on a face to face basis and i've got such low self esteem and no self confidence.
But I think on here, everyone has prob felt that way at some point, and if anyone can understand how you feel...these guys can.
Everyone on here is lovely and i will try to make a meet near to me sometime.
Tatty B xx
hi Emma,
I can understand that you are nervous about meeting everyone. The good thing is that the groups normally aren't too big - about 8 people so you don't really feel overwehlmed. No one would judge you at all. After all, we are all in the same boat!! You probably just don't have too much confidence but that is something that you can work on and improve. You do need to force yourself to get out there and talk to people though..Just think, one day soon you could meet us all!!
Sarah :D
"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal
Hi Emma
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Is this a social anxiety? General anxiety? Or lack of confidence? If I have an idea as to what it is and why I feel like it may help me a bit.</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
In that case , it's definitely lack of confidence and low self esteem..
I too struggle to make friends, I always hide behind my shield ( self protection)...I worry sometimes about what people think of me , but at the end of the day, we're all human beings and we shouldn't feel inferior to others ( difficult sometimes I know).
I am sure you can get some support here and get thru it.
Take care.
Florence.
**Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith. **
Thanks Florence. Inferior is a good word. I feel very inferior to everyone.
Maybe we should have a meet to rediscover our confidence LOL
Take care
Feel free to PM me, if you want to talk.
Emma xx
Keep focused, keep positive.
Emma,
I too would never go to a meet as I also feel inferior to everyone else.
I also don't post on here when I'm having a bad "inferior" moment as I think anything I have to say is of no use to anyone.
Definately low self esteem and lack of confidence in yourself.
Kate
Emma-jane and Kate - I always think both of you write posts worth reading and give great advice.
Maybe you don't have enough people telling you how fab you are regularly enough.
I'm always telling/ordering my family and friends to praise me - which they do as they know whats good for them.
Joking apart I think we all need to feel valued which in turn helps our self-esteem. I can tell you both you are valuable on this site for sure.
Love Piglet [8D]
Its funny isnt it, although i really appreciate what you say piglet, and it is very kind of you. Something at the back of my mind says, when I get praised or told what a good friend etc, I am. I think people are just humouring me, or that they dont mean it.
All of you seem to be so good friends on here, I feel at a distant.
Gosh how pathetic and sympathy seeking does that sound LOL.
As I right this, it sounds so silly, but I can at least see where it falls onto lack of confidence. Thank you all.
Maybe oneday I will meet you all.
Feel free to PM me, if you want to talk.
Emma xx
Keep focused, keep positive.
Hmmm you could just be right there, Piglet, no one EVER praises me for anything though, as an adult, I don't really think I should be expecting anyone to.
Emma, I always feel distant too and think it sounds pathetic when I admit it to myself. I'm never good enough.
Kate
Hi Emma
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Maybe we should have a meet to rediscover our confidence LOL</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
Hehe, yeah, we could meet and feel low together, LOL, we shall have a party too . ;)
Hi Kate
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I'm never good enough.</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
You are good Kate , that's low self esteem. :)
Florence.
**Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith. **
Thats sounds good Florence, could do with a party. Bet your miles from me though? [:P]
Kate - were a right pair arnt we LOL
Feel free to PM me, if you want to talk.
Emma xx
Keep focused, keep positive.
So, how do we go about gaining this big old chunk of high self esteem from???
*Thinks* maybe they sell it on ebay....
Kate
Hi Emma, I used to feel like you and still do to a certain extent but I was once told to imagine everybody as equals, after all at the end of the day we all pee and poo.You may say urgh or similar but it is true.
Some people may have more money, some have more brains (not me lol), some be tall silph like figures, or some 4st overweight like me but they are no better than you or me.
I went to the meetup last week and it wasent the easiest of things to do and as Im sure Kairen wont mind me saying, we were together for the day previous and we would be talking about something not at all related and then all of a sudden we would come out with, o what if Sal this......... or what if Nic that............., but it was great, we all got on fine and I certainly didnt feel "below" them for want of a better word.And I am sure they all felt the same.
people on this site are great and I think if you get chance to go then go for it.
I have worked in a job for a lot of years now where I continuosly need to give praise and that has helped me accept it too, I love a bit of praise and positive talking.
Hope this helps, lots of love Alexis,x
Thanks for this Alexis, I will try and look at everyone as equals. Ill check out the next meet ups and see when and where they are. Maybe I should think of a one on one first with someone?
Im the one with no brains and definately 4 stone over weight aswell, so your not the only there LOL. Infact that is one of my issues issues is the weight.
Thanks again xx
Feel free to PM me, if you want to talk.
Emma xx
Keep focused, keep positive.
its hard Emma I know, especially when we have issues such as our weight etc, teeth are another issue I have,yes a one to one first was definitly best, dont think I would have gone otherwise, you are not near us are you, I travelled few hrs tho to get to that one, Love Alexis,xx
No Im in Gloucestershire. Was that the first time you met Kairen, the day before?
Feel free to PM me, if you want to talk.
Emma xx
Keep focused, keep positive.
Yes it was Emma, we met chat and on forum then went on msn and gave mobiles, I hadent even spoke to her, met her at station and was just super then on, still friends now after meetingLove Alexis,xx
That sounds lovely Alexis. Take care
Feel free to PM me, if you want to talk.
Emma xx
Keep focused, keep positive.
Hi Emma
I wonder if you'd like the Glenn Harrold range of cd's.
I've recommended these a couple of times in the chatroom and they seem to have gone down really well.
They are hypnosis ones (not scary - and I was a little wary) and I think they are really good. I've got about 5 of them and all are great at making you relax, if nothing else.
Think the ones you and Kate might like are
Self-confidence
Self-esteem
Maybe they could help change your thinking patterns.
By the way Emma & Kate where do you live?
Love Piglet
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Hi Piglet.
I didnt think of self esteem/confidence CDs. I have Glenn Harrolds Sleep one and I totally agree it is really good.
Thanks for the advice and reminding me. I live in Gloucestershire. Where are you Piglet?
Take Care
Feel free to PM me, if you want to talk.
Emma xx
Keep focused, keep positive.
Hi Piglet,
I actually went for hypnosis last year, went well but still some things left unresolved I reckon!
I live in Birmingham.
Kate
I'm Dorset guys - guess we'll have to stick at being mates on here for a little longer then.
Maybe see you later in chat.
Love Pigletxx[8D]
Hi Emma
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Thats sounds good Florence, could do with a party. Bet your miles from me though?</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I live in Bedfordshire, where do you live?
Florence.
**Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith. **
Hi All
Florence - Bedfordshire, quite a way from me, but not an impossibility.
Piglet - Dorset, Im off to Devon tomorrow, my parents live there. Dorset is about an hour and a half from me.
Kate - Just down the road, im in Gloucestershire. Stratford end
Feel free to PM me, if you want to talk.
Emma xx
Keep focused, keep positive.
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