Fear of eating in public

[Keep going]

Hi, over the past year or so, i have made great progress in my overcoming SA. At the moment i have great trouble in eating with friends and in public places. So much so, that i dont eat with friends or in public anymore. Anyone else suffer from this?? Or even overcome this?? I would love to know your story??

[Gemma T]

Hey

I dont suffer from this but i wanted to show support anyway. i had a friend who wouldnt eat in front of boys. i have the opposite prob. ill eat anywhere

Good luck x x x

[i hate panicking]

Hiya Keep going :)


I had a big problem eating in front of people years ago especially if it was someone I was involved with ...I think it was the thought of dropping food down my top or something like that :blush:.
Also if we ate out I would pick somewhere In the corner where I was hid away or if it was too crowded I would just walk straight back out again.

Take care

[Mully]

I used to have a terrible fear of eating in front of public or 'boys' haha.. I had just cause too. As one time I was having Sunday lunch with my new boyfriend, I was about 14 years old. We had chicken and peas with chips. And I remember trying to cut this chicken and feeling nervous when my knife slipped and Chicken and peas went flying everywhere.. I wanted to die !:ohmy: ..

Then, another time, I was in McDonalds and on a first date with a really gorgeous boy I wanted to impress and tried desperatley to be normal and not afraid and stuttery.. on a busy Sat afternoon .. I put a tray on the table that contained two cokes and burgers, fries and sat down. I bit into my scary chicken burger..mayo dripped on my chin and lap and lettuce fell out and i stood up in a panic! the tray that was sightly hanging over the edge of the table went up ..and the coke and everyting else went all over my date and everywhere else.... :roflmao:

I laugh now, but at the time I was mortified!.. I'm not sure how I got over the fear.. I think I remember a time with a bunch of friends we were all eating Spag bol and making a mess.. lol.. and I realised that no one really cared!.. it put me at ease and I think I just got better over time. Now i don't care and will gladly sink my teeth into a extra creamy bun and get it on my nose and chin in a public place!.. So long as I can see the exit :D and have knapkin handy of course :shades:

[PoppyC]

Hi
I have social anxiety and have always hated eating in public. 29 years on and I still wont eat in public!!! I hate it if someone watches me eat, including my partner of 2 years! I first noticed this when I was about 14 years old and found it embarrassing eating in front of others. I still am not sure what it is all about - whether it is due to me looking like a pig eating or what! lol

[Wenjoy]

I have had this panic about eating out since I was 18 - I am now 49 - I do eat out but usually in pubs which I feel less initimidated by- I hate restaurants and have to sit by a window or door as I get so hot and breathless when I panic!! Silly really when you think about it - also I only ever eat one course claiming Im not hungry just so I only have to worry about one plate of food. My fear came from being a child when my parents made me eat everythign on my plate in restaurants coz they had paid for it and they had little money so I grew up panicking about not finishing everything on my plate. Now my attitude is "so what if I leave half my food - who cares!" wenjoy x

[pete69]

i hate eating out-i have to sometimes but meds n booze has to be consumed first-not loads but enough.i kinda enjoy it once im there-and i do like eating outdoors in pubs in the summer.and i still have issues sometimes in front of g/f at home,mainly when im anxious anyway-i dont want to shake or make a fool of myself-even in front of her-crazy i know-i think i have been hiding it all my life so its a defense mechanism now-dont show fear!

i hate eating out..ok reding back it seems i dont hate it that much,i hate the idea of it,but i would never ever eat in a resturant without a few drinks etc,so in that respect my SA on this issue has not gone away..i need to tackle it.

[Meewah]

Hi Keep Going

I hope this is helpful, I find that being in a small group of people when I think I am being watched by people in the group very difficult. Sitting in the Pub with friends, I have to get a small drink that is easily handled and then if I feel uncomfortable I cant pick it up.

With the eating in public. I find breakfasts at hotels the worst. If I am with my wife in can be OK but sometimes I have to go away on Business and sitting with business colleagues for breakfast or saying that lunch would be a no,no. If I did I would be so concious that I would find eating a slice of toast embarrassing as I would shake which would make me more self conscious and I would shake more until the point where I could not even pick up the toast.

I will say that I keep trying to overcome it and some days I can bear it just and others no way.
Evening meals with my wife and friends can also sometimes be difficult but if I choose my friends carefully I find that there table habits take my mind off me.

The main problem at the moment seems to be drinking in public...

Wheres the help you may be asking?
I say to you just keep trying to eat out...soon you will realise which are bad days and good and you can order dependant on how you feel.

All the best

Mee

[RachaelShambles]

I have this fear due to my fear of being sick in public. I can eat in a restaurant but i need to be near the exit and it cant be that busy. I wont eat a lot and I worry throughout the meal. I wont go to any of the partys at work because of this, i dont mind eating with my mum but with collegues - thats a big no no.

[sMINT]

Mully, your stories made me laugh lol. It must have been awful at the time though.

I have a fear of eating out in public or away from home. I can eat so much at home. But when I go out I eat bare minimum. Its not that I hate people looking, its like rachaelshambles, its the fear of being sick. I don't mind so much in the summer when I can sit out side in the restaurant as its cooler and less people, more open.

I also dont eat sweets, chocolate, crisps or fizzy drink when I am away from home incase I feel sick afterwards. I just drink water and eat fruit or maybe some chips. I think this fear about the sweets came on from when I was in school and one day after eating chocolate at break time and being sat in class feeling really sick. Ever since then Ive never eaten sweets or chocolate when Im away from home on a journey or a holiday.

[lbwhite89]

I have this issue as well. I have no problem eating in front of my family, fiance, or close friends and I'm not more anxious eating in front of guys, but it's people I don't know...even if they're eating too! It's a huge problem at work and school and I'll go to great lengths to not eat in front of people. It's pretty awful.

[stuart39]

this type of anxiety or phobia can be crippling but i think some of you sound stronger than you might give yourselves credit for. well done folks.
i have the same problem and prefer to eat alone at the moment but this is down to the ongoing swallowing problem so i think people will look at me or watch me as I struggle through even a small plate of food as i am very slow - a close friend told me not to get so obsessed with what other people may or may not think and if i am slow at eating i am slow at eating and theres nothing i can do to change that. he is right but after 30+ years its a hard habit to break and for a grown man its quite embarassing as id love to not have the problem and tuck into steak and chips with some friends and clean my plate at roughly the same time as everyone else. its worse if women are eating something larger or chewier or dryer than what i have ordered and they still finish before me. men usually polish their food off pronto dont they? women even joke "never trust a man who doesnt like his food". i love food i just cant get in down normally.....

in the past when ive really had no other choice but to join people to eat ie; the dreaded xmas party or some other work related social event ive got to the point where as i am lifting a fork of food to my mouth that hand starts to get the shakes as the forl is raised and brought to my mouth. i feel guilty too when you see other people on the TV like comic relief or children in need where they really know the meaning of suffering and hate myself for being such a p*ssy about this.
i do tend to enjoy myself once the plates have been collected and its drinks for the rest of the evening.

[petia78]

Hi, over the past year or so, i have made great progress in my overcoming SA. At the moment i have great trouble in eating with friends and in public places. So much so, that i dont eat with friends or in public anymore. Anyone else suffer from this?? Or even overcome this?? I would love to know your story??

Hello,I feel in the same way.This is horrible.When I go with friends in pubs,I geeting sweat and tremble. I want solve this problem,but I don't know how

[gem7]

yes i also have this i hate eating in public i never used to be like this but my anxiety has made me like that and i hate it :frown:

[Rls1994]

Yeah, I also hate eating when I'm out. Especially when I was at college. I just don't like the thought of people staring at me while I eat, it makes me extremely uncomfortable. If I do eat out, I eat very slowly and politely, but at home.... That's a completely different story. :whistles:

[sarahblonde32]

I suffer with food anxiety and hate eating out, i get this gagging sensation and can't physically eat. its horrible.

sarah

[bellesmummy]

I know this is an old post but was just wondering how you all cope with Christmas time?
I even have problems eating with some of my family and especially hubbys family!!

[phil6]

Hi all,
I know all about this one. It was my main anxiety.
I used to be so nervous about eating a meal out that I would feel nauseous an be frightened that I would not be able to eat at all.
I got over this fear by having a brandy on arrival which calmed me down and I was then able to eat. Of course this became unnecessary after a while as I started to get less anxious. I also then learned that people don't really care about whether I eat my meal or leave it.
However, I am back suffering anxiety at the moment, and memory is playing its tricks so I am worrying about Christmas Day and sitting with everyone with a huge meal in front if me.
Phil

[bellesmummy]

Hi Phil. Have a brandy before your Christmas dinner, or might it not work now?
Well I have just survived a roast at the in-laws, looking back you wonder what all the fuss was about, I did have a glass of wine before which I think helped! I haven't had a 'drink' for a few months and it went straight to my head!
I don't want drink to be the answer to my problem but I think it will be a short term solution this Xmas!!

[Magic]

I don't remember if I have mentioned about eating in front of anyone before, so sorry if I am repeating myself.
I am a slow eater, and it is because I am frightened of choking.
The only trouble is I am always the one that is last finishing the meal if I am with company. I begin to panic and sweat, so I leave some of the food -which,if I was at home it would be all right.
Understand you completely Phil.Good Luck to all

[scared soul]

I seem to be struggling with this at the moment. New Years Eve I was round at a friends house and we all ate together around the dining room table. I really struggled with this, it was just me, him, his parents and a couple of their friends but even so I found I couldn't look at anybody while I was eating or say anything and I was only too glad when told I could go back into the other room if I wanted too. I always feel like this when eating with friends, I just get so uncomfortable and embarrassed. It feels really stupid because most of the time I know and am comfortable with the people I'm with but I just struggle so much when it comes to eating with them. You're not alone.

[Paranoia]

Is it ok for me to join in on this thread?

I can relate to alot of your stories. I used to have a massive eating disorder when I was around 12 to 15 years old when I stopped eating. I did it cause I hated when my friends, or anyone looked at me while I ate. I was a chubby child so it was mostly cause of that.

Almost 10 years later I've started yet again hating eating in public. I think it has to do with that a woman in my, lets say social circle have started jumping on me about my weight. I'm not the skinniest or the chubbiest person, i'm not even fat, but I have curves and in her eyes I seem to be too large. Since she started with all her comments I've been trying to avoid eating in public cause I feel observed by people, cause she always observes me when she's around.

Her words and her observation is haunting me still.

[vaughanp99]

I understand that this is quite common - I always eat at my desk and spend a long time carefully selecting what to have for lunch. I avoid crisps because people might hear me crunching! I also think people will judge what I am eating - not healthy enough etc. I know it's mad really and I'm sure could be challenged with CBT techniques but can't force myself to do it.

[greggs92]

I used to have this problem, then i realized it was me, not anybody else who was worried, no one is actually bothered, I noticed how insane it was to think like this...so I stopped. Seriously they are too wrapped up in their own minds to worry . I hope this has gave you some reassurance :)

[Rls1994]

I always find a quiet place to eat if I get something to snack on in town. I can't stand people staring at me while I eat away. It makes me feel super anxious.

[Cathy67]

I've had the same problem for about 35 years, started when I began secondary school and has never gone away. I've missed out on lots of family meals over the years and feel sad I can't eat out with my fiancé. I don't know what started it but have always been a slow eater and hate being the last one to finish even though I don't eat much. I have tried to eat out a few times many years ago but felt really sick and had to go outside and wait in the car for the family to finish, embarrassing and annoying :mad: Wish I could get over this as I'd love to be able to have the occasional meal out with my partner, thankfully he's very understanding but I still feel bad. I find even having a drink out is difficult, fear I'm going to choke.

[Ryan92]

I know exactly how you feel. Ive not eaten in public for seven years due to my GAD, social anxiety and social phobia :weep: mainly because I was made fun of as I was overweight when I was young, it badly damaged my confidence. When I was at college I never once had anything to eat in public. Im receiving help (CBT) so I hope one day I can go and eat out with a friend or family. Good luck :bighug1: best wishes :D