Dilemma!

[StephdeMeth]

Ok, so I don't really know what to do, and none of my housemates can help me, so I thought I'd put this question to you lovely people.
Tomorrow evening is my University Christian Union. I love it, and I normally get a real buzz out of it. I also feel its an important group in furthering my relationship with God.
However, the last 3 times I have been I have had a panic attack. I have had to get out the room very quickly, the first two lasted over an hour with the later one lasting less time. The first two times an ambulance was called, and the only reason I didn't get taken to hospital was because I refused to go.
I don't know whether to go or not! I'm really scared of going in case it happens again, but I'm determined not to let my condition affect my life in general. I'm very worried of becoming agoraphobic and so I'm trying to lead a normal life, or at least, as normal as possible.
If i don't go, I may never pull myself together enough to go back. And this would affect me extremely. However, if I do go, and it happens again, not only will I affect my friends who follow me out (most of whom are told to go away fairly quickly), but I'm not entirely sure I could face anyone from CU without being reminded.
My one friend in particular is worrying me - he told me the other day that he thought I was becoming dependent on him. What he doesn't seem to understand is that yes, him being there helps me a lot at time of panic (he's the only person I've ever been able to trust when having an attack), but I've been doing this on my own a lot longer than I've known him, and I've always coped. If I go tomorrow and have an attack, he may feel that it's proved his point.
So, what do you think people, do I go and risk an attack, or do I not go and continue to let my condition affect my everyday life?
Thank you in advance.

[sMINT]

Hey StephdeMeth,

You should deff go to the next one! Facing your fears is a big thing to do but when you have been and come home you will feel a great sense of achievement. It will be worth it.

I used to put things off, I hardly see any of my friends and never go out but lately Im going places again, I always try and go to town for pointless things just to put me in social situations. I feel it really helps me even when I do panic.

Have you been to see a docotor yet about the attacks? Maybe try some herbel remedies to try and calm you down before you go to the Christian Uninon.

Hope it goes well for you :)

[StephdeMeth]

Thank you so much! I will post on here how it goes!

[StephdeMeth]

Ok, so I went. I lasted about 10 minutes, then had to get out. My panic attack wasn't as bad as they usually are, which was nice. Now I have the dilemma of do I go back or not. I can't really face going back there for the next few weeks. I don't really want to let it take over my life, but I have to think of the people that it affects, they're more important than me.
Thanks for the help.

[sMINT]

Well done for going. You went & that's the main thing :yesyes:

Should try and go again, But this time leave early on purpose. Try and tell yourself that you are leaving on your own accord not when panic tells you to.
Try and introduce your self to the situation little by little. Maybe too much too soon triggers the panic as your trying to stay for the whole duration and constantly thinking about it.

I often do this, Ill be on a bus journey and instead of trying to forget I think of how long I have to sit there and start counting down the minutes. Usually end up panicking the whole journey then :(

Hope the next time goes better for you

[StephdeMeth]

That's a really good idea! If I try and regain control of the situation, it should be fine - eventually, hopefully!
Thank you so much :)