View Full Version : Breast cancer phobia - can anyone relate?
Hello, I feel such a nutter at the moment. I just can't seem to stop panicing that i have breast cancer. There is no history of it my family and my breasts have been thouroughly checked out by doctors and ultrasounds (commisioned because of my anxiety, not because docs could feel anything to worry about), but yet I am not reassured. I keep checking and keep thinking I feel subtle lumps. I thought I knew my breasts so well but yet I keep finding new things to worry about in them. Honestly, if I didn't want another baby I would have them off. I'm that bad!!
I know I am a complete freak..... but can anyone relate to this???
XXX
molpookski
06-03-09, 11:52
Hi Jojo2316,
I get plaugued by cancer in general. Mum died of pancreatic cancer and Dad is now fighting his battle with Mesothelioma - so you can imagine I constantly freak out about the fact that I may be next. If you have checked your breasts and your doctor has also, then it should be OK. I have been told that breast cancer lumps are quite firm and that you would know that it was different from the other softish lumps you usually have in your breasts.
Try to think of other things when you feel yourself having anxious thoughts - go for a walk or call a girlfriend as this always works for me.
Thanks Molpookski, and i'm so sorry to hear about your parents.
You are right, and I think I really need to STOP CHECKING so much...... but I get so panicy if I haven't checked for a while, it's very OCD. I can't even make it for a whole day! Sad isn't it?
xx
molpookski
06-03-09, 12:03
Not really - this what anxiety does to us. All I can say is that if you check them once a month, you are pretty much on top of it. :-)
I can totally understand where you are coming from. My mum died of cancer last June and it has left me constantly believing I am next in line. My current cancer fears are breast cancer, oral cancer and cervical cancer as I had my first ever abnormal smear come back in november and Im terrified even though Im told it will probably revert to normal by itself. I spoke to my doctor about my breast cancer worries and he told me that the best way to deal is to only check once a month as any more than that is unneccesary..... and do it mid way between periods, as the closer you get to your menstral cycle, the more you breasts feel naturally lumpy and so it causes panic you neednt experience. x
Hi xfilme, really sorry about your mum too - that's so sad. Don't worry about the abnormal smear - every second person I speak to has had one of those - it seems to be very common and nothing to worry about. I also get oral cancer worries. In fact, on the day I got home from my breast ultrasound I found that, because I couldn't (temporarily!) worry about breast cancer, I had to find something else....... so I looked in my mouth with a torch and totally freaked at the sight of raised spot things on my throat. Was sure they were cancer. ;-)
xxx
Hey!
I can be terrible with this one, i used to have to check myself over and over during the day, like id rush to the toilets at break to check myself..then again at lunch, and was convinced i kept finding more different lumps and weird things, its awful:(
Yes - that's what i do too!
I fear this too lately.Am debating whether to go to doctor and have her check. I constantly poke and prod and am now wondering whether this is why I have aches and pains around the breast area!Anyone know anyone who has had BC and how obvious it would be?
CharlesLinden
09-03-09, 12:00
In anxiety disorders, because of the adrenalin fueled 'what if', reassurance seeking, thoughts which produces this 'catastrophic thinking' AND because you are all too creative for your own good (because you have that rare commodity called Emotional Intelligence), your mind keeps telling you that there is a danger present, even when there isn't.
Because breast cancer is an ever present and logical possibility, regardless of risk factors etc, your creative mind latches on to it and embellishes the thought of the risk with your superior creativity.
It's what causes all obsessive thought patterns during anxiety disorders - OCD, emetophobia, agoraphobia etc. etc. All based on 'appropriate' and possible risks but all blown out of proportion by the 'what if' thought processes!
The same subconscious processes fuel the urge to jump off a high cliff or the thoughts we get sometimes when we see a sharp kitchen knife etc. Even 'non anxious' foks get these!
The good news is that once your anxiety is returned to a 'normal' level as your preset, this constant searching for, finding and obsessing about physical symptoms and illnesses will go away too. I was chronic and now I just worry about my kids - when it's appropriate!!
Charles
Hi guys, me again. Well, I've just discovered I am pregnant! My mum thinks I shouldn't 'go ahead' with it because my anxiety is so bad at the moment...... but my partner is really happy. Anyway, I am going to go ahead with the pregnancy but I'm not sure how I will cope with all the lumpy bump;y changes that my breasts will go through. I currently check my breasts about 20 times a day and I constantly think I am finding stuff - this is surely going to get soooo much worse during pregnancy and breast feeding. Docs have thoroughly checked my breasts and can find nothing but I am still in SUCH a state about it. I don't know how I will get through the next year or so. I wish I could be normal and just not think about it a whole load..........
Anyways, just thought I'd share!
xxx
hi,
i check myself all day and night i find new lumps all the time,
when you are pregnant its not as bad as your head is all over the place trying to prepare for your new little baby,
there are no more lumps that appear when you are pregnant than there are when you are on your period and they are harder to spot because your breasts will be rock solid, it may get worse a few months after the baby is here. but there is alot of support out there including here.
how far on are you ?
About five minutes! I've literally only found out. Actually this will be my third baby - I am 32 - but the breast anxiety is new. I never had it with my last two. I don't think I even really bothered to check my breasts at all when pregnant...... so I don't know what happens to them. But now I am compulsively checking them - always running to the loo to do it. I don't know how I got this bad. I tell myself that I have to go a whole day without checking, then I'll start thinking about one of the many lumpy bumpy bits in my boobs and it's like I HAVE to poke it again, just to quadruple check that it isn't a sinister lump. I can't stop myself, but it totally keeps the cycle going. I should just trust the docs and the breast ultrasound I had last month and leave them alone. I wish I could!
xx
how long ave you had the breast anxiety was it just after your second baby?
i am the same but its not just my breasts i have to check every part of my body from head to toes, all the things that are diffrent that day i have to check over and over again.
everything started getting worse after my second baby .x
justbananas
13-03-09, 14:53
congrats!! just think though - with all those dr. appointments, maybe you'll feel more assured being under constant care and you can bring up any concerns with them on a regular basis? really happy for you! how exciting! also maybe your completely nuts hormones will affect your level of anxiety or at least distract you from the breast anxiety somehow?
Hahaa maybe,, Just bananas.......
Patmac, that's really interesting - I'm just like you - mine totally came on after my second baby, who was born 17 months ago. Weirdly, I was totally normal before that. What's that all about do you think?
ANd actually I don't confine myself to breasts either, although lately I have - and I anticipate it getting worse now - although my doc thinks perhaps it will get better...... she says sometimes pregnancy hormones sometime lower anxiety....... she is an optimist I think!!
xx.
Cogratulations!!!
What wonderful news for you!
I'm sure you'll be more re-assured with having constant check-ups too.
Maybe you're a bit more pregnant than you think...hence the lumps and bumps?
If you've had the scans and check-ups, why do you still think something is wrong? Toomuch TV and magazine articles maybe...or just too much information in general.
A friend of mine was exactly the same and finally her boob Doc did some biopsies. All was fine, of course, and she's ok now.
Best of luck, Jojo. I'm so pleased for you, and maybe this is the distraction you're needing right now.
Take care,
Pegs XXXXX
Thanks pegs - that is really sweet of you. No, I've always had lumpy boobs..... but you wouldn't believe the subtle things I now notice and worry about - things that a doc or a scan wouldn't pick up...... like, for example, I recently noticed I have a tiny little ridge in my left breast that feels like a hair. It's not even a lump, but I worry about it and keep feeling it. Part of me knows it's nuts but the other part is compelled to keep checking. I think it's quite OCD.
Anyway, how are you? I've been thinking about you..........
xxx
Hiya Jojo
Strangely calmer today. I think my major meltdown in the hospital the other day was a huge release for me. I went hysterical when I was told I would need a chest drain, as my Gran had one and then died. Not from that of course, but I think the pain of the procedure finished her off. I think you release a lot of chemicals in tears which is why a good bawl can make us feel better.
I'm obviously terrified of the pending results, but want to know what's potting and get the necessary treatment. I'm so tempted to google, but won't!
Please don't panic about your boobs...you've had tests and all was ok?
Does breast cancer run in the family, or can you remember what set you off?
How strange I had health anxiety first over other horrible things I have had, but have now found another. This sucks.
Love Pegs X
You're right - having a good cry does help.
No, breast cancer doesn't run in my family - in fact no relative has had it so far............ touch wood.......... but only someting like 1 in 10 breast cancers is inherited so......
I think i'm going sooo nuts about it at the mo because I've just come off my meds......
xxxx
Hi Jojo
How are you feeling today?
I think you're really brave by coming off your meds just like that! But being pregnant changes things, of course.
Please look after yourself, and when you see your Doc or nurse for your check up, have your booobs checked again to put your mind at rest. I find they are so thorough about these things....thank goodness.
Love Peg X
Thanks peg - yes I will, I think, although my poor doc will roll her eyes (she thoroughly checked them recently and sent me for an ultrasound for peace of mind)........
But the thing is, I keep getting this sinking feeling in my stomach, this feeling of dread, and then I start to worry that I/they missed something........
Silly, really. I wish I could get back to feeling 'normal', when days, weeks, months would go by without me giving my health a second thought (imagine!!).
But how are you doing today?
Lots of love,
xxx
hi i am new to this but i think i have had health anxiety for a few years,and it all seems to revolve around cancer! ive had endless checks on moles which have turned out to be benign,but my new one is breast cancer.
I am currently 8 months pregnant and about 2 months ago i found a lump,i went to doctor who refered me to a breast specialist
It turned out to be a cyst related to pregnancy,i had it drained but it returned again so back to the doctor i went,then back to the breast specialist who drained it again! he even said if it comes back dont worry it will go after pregnancy,but its back and i cannot stop thinking i have breast cancer,i keep imagining the worst and being due to give birth in 4 weeks time its the last thing i need,anyone any suggestions?
I'm no expert but I very much doubt you would be able to drain a cancerous lump. And if the doctor thought it was anything serious they would have done more checks. I think we just automatically associate a lump with breast cancer.You are fine and have all kinds of normal things happening to your body, pregnancy will give you all kinds of lumps and bumps so try not to worry. Focus on the good and congrats on the pregnancy
Thankyou,yeah i know everything is ok but its just the health anxiety taking over,its a horrible feeling,im a worrier anyway,il worry about the slightest things and end up getting in a state,its horrible! im trying to relax now though and keep my mind on other things and hopefully it will disapear.
I'm pregnant too and I honestly can't bear the thought of all the lumpy bumpy changes that will happen in my breasts. It scares me soooo much. I even hate looking at myself in the mirror in case I notice a breast lump....... it occupies about 85% of my thoughts.........
Any suggestions for coping strategies??
xxx
what u got to remember is breast cancer is rare in pregnancy about one in 3000,how old r u? just throw yourself into preparing for the new arrival and think how all your time will be occupied when they come along,thats what im doing,i know if i dont think about it then it will just go away as i have experienced it before but it seems to be worse this time around think its the hormones lol,just think how lucky u r and life is for living,im trying to be positive because fearing the worst all the time does not help,congratulations too!!!
Hi Jenni - I'm 32. Actually, this is my third pregnancy..... but it's the first one with HA!
I don't know what is wrong with me. I am in SUCH a panic about breast cancer........ and I can't seem to get any perspective on it. I wake up every morning in a panic and - although I try not to - always end up checking my boobs; and I always feel something I think is sinister. I honestly can't bear it anymore - it is taking over my life at the moment. I would love to have them chopped off. I have been to the doctor and had a mammogram and ultrasound - which comforted me for a week or two, but now I think maybe they missed something. I am currently 8 weeks pregnant and the thought of the coming breast changes terrifies me. I am petrified of developing breast cancer while I am pregnant.
I am 32 years old, with no history of breast cancer in my family.....
Sorry for sounding so nuts - but it's how I feel at the moment!!!:weep: :weep: :weep:
xxxxxx
tashbarnes87
31-03-09, 11:47
awww hun, i went though exactly the same fear when i was pregnant! i could & still can feel the milk ducts whic feel like pea sized lumps which i freaked out about but of course its all baby related,. In the end i had to stop checking them when i was pregnant a they constantly changed an felt really lumpy. Why dont you pop along to the docs and ask if he can gie you a breast exam ? its embarresing but it made me eel soo much better. Congrats on the little one, my baby is 8 weeks today lol and i miss being pregnant soo much, Its hard with anxiety but try and enjoy it & remember pregnancy hormones can make your anxiety worse! xx
Hi Tash - thanks so much for replying........ I saw a pic of your little boy - he is gorgeous! Actually my doc is really sweet - she says she will check my boobs regularly if I don't check them inbetween times coz she knows that the constant prodding makes me soooo much worse. I just don't know how I will get through the next 8 months though........ I keep seeming to read about women who develop breast cancer while pregnant, but it gets missed coz people assume it is 'normal pregnancy lumpiness'. Arrrrgghh - I wish I could think about other stuff!!
xxx
Ahhh Jojo!
You are so good at calming everyone else down and reminding us of the facts!
Go back and read some of your own posts and take them as replies to your thread. You make sooooo much sense!
Take care,
Love Pegs X
Your body is changing that's scary enough, you will start to get changes all the time, but they are not things to worry about.
When your baby is born you will have a new adventure in life, then all this will hopefully be a bad memory.
Thanks doomey - and extra special thanks to you pegs....... how are you doing?xxx
Hi jojo, i can relate to your fears as I have/had similar myself. My mum died in june of breast cancer and it totally freaked me out. I suffer from mastitis (infected milk ducts) all the time anyway, so my boobs are naturally lumpy and bumpy... I went to the docs and voiced my concerns and he said the chances of me having breast cancer at my age were remote as I havent hit menopause yet. He tells me you should check your breasts in thwe shower a week and a half after your period as the menstral cycle causes your boobs to be more lumpy due to hormones around that time of the month. He said it is advisable not to check continually as it will only make them sore and will make you less likely to notice anything out of sorts. If its any reassureance to you (being the same age as me), he gave me some parting advice. The most common cause of death to people of our age is road accidents..... but you dont become afraid every time you have to cross the road.... so why worry about something which is far more unlikely. A lot of breast pain and lumps are caused by mastitis, like me, which causes a throbbing ache.... and lumps. Ive had many many mamograms over the years, and now I realise that it is not necessarily likely.... but still, I totally understand your anxiety as i occasionally have the same myself when i allow myself to ponder on my fears x
Hi Xfilme - thanks, you've really helped actually....... I'm so sorry to hear about your mum though. So do you manage to only check your breasts once a month? And does it scare you when you do check? I can't touch my boobs without my heart racing, etc, it's horrible!
xxx
Hi Xfilme - thanks, you've really helped actually....... I'm so sorry to hear about your mum though. So do you manage to only check your breasts once a month? And does it scare you when you do check? I can't touch my boobs without my heart racing, etc, it's horrible!
xxx
Immediately after my mum passed away i was just fine. That was in june last year. in november i got abnormal smear test results come through which triggered my anxiety. Then I started to fear my own body, especially my boobs. Ive been to the docs many times before because of lumps... ever since i was seven as a matter of fact. I spoke to my doc who fortunately understands my anxiety. He assured me there was no need to check more than once a month. I find it very difficult but once a month i do manage to check. the knack is to check the corect way. when i was younger i used to use my fingertips and poke around and find all kinds of things. The proper technique is to use your middle three fingers and press flat against your breasts checking all the way round each. If you do not do it flat you will find things there that will freak you. The kinds of lumps you need to worry about can be felt by pressing your fingers flat and with slight pressure on your breasts. If you dig in you will find ducts that can become inflamed and you can misinterpret them. I say this as I have had soooooooo many checks at my doctors. You can always ask for a physical breast exam from you gp... but to answer your questions, yes, i check once a month whilst soaped up and showering. But fter that check I accept I have done it and do not check until the following month.... and yes, i do get scared. But after a while it gets easier. Just remember it is not so common before menopause. You have a while to go yet. Please send me private messages if you need any more reassurance. Im always here to help or listen x
Thanks again xfilme - you are so right! THat is exactly what I do - I poke really hard, really get in there with my fingers. And you wouldn't believe what I feel (well, maybe you would!) - all sorts of pad-like bits, long cord-like things (veins, ducts?), cushiony bits, fibrous bits, ridges, rough bits...... it goes on and on and drives me quite mad. And of course, the doctor, feeling with the flats of her fingers (like she should!), doesn't feel any of these things.
So why did you have mammograms? And were they able to see much? When I had one recently they couldn't see a whole load because of my age and because i'd only recently finished breast-feeding my son, which was why they did the ultrasound too.
Thanks again - you really have helped.
ANd p.s - your smear WILL be fine. They just want a closer look, that's all. I know tons of people who have had colposcopys and not a single one had - or has - cancer.
Thanks for telling me about your friends having the colposcopies... really find that reassuring. I had all the mamograms etc from an early age mostly because my boobs were really painful. When I first started developing, one was twice the size of the other and had a mass inside like a ring doughnut. As I got older they just seems to be more like a bunch of grapes in there. Really tender, especially if I ran. Mastitis runs in our family. Its not dangerous. It can be relieved by daily evening primrose oil capsules... The problems lasted right up until I was about 20.... when I developed clinical neurotic reactive depression. I presume its like so many things. When you get a new problem you forget the old. I still suffer from it but now im used to it. I get tenderness around the time of my periods and have to wear an underwired bra for support, but trust me, the more you prod the more you will worry. Check once a month and you will be fine. If in doubt, ask your doctor to prod. I havent had a doctor check in a while but I run out of my pill soon (they prescribe me a year at a time) and every time i go to get the prescription renewed I ask for a full pill check... ie blood pressure, breast check etc. Im sure you are fine but Im always here if you need me. x
Bless you, I have suffered from that very thing. Thought I had breast cancer on and off for many years. Go to the doctor and only let the doctor check your breast, that cured me. I had to teach myself to believe in the doctor. You will be fine love, enjoy your pregnancy.
Kathyx
My breast cancer phobia is ruining my life at the moment, and the only way out I can see is to have my breasts removed completely. I worry about my breasts all day and the rest of my life just sort of fits around it....... this is no way to spend a life. I've spoken to my doctor about it who says she won't even consider referring me for a mastectomy until after councilling and after I've had my baby (i'm currently pregnant with my third child). I understand this (in fact I would like to breast feed my baby before I have a mastectomy), but I am terrified/convinced I will get breast cancer in the next year. I am finding it so difficult to cope at the moment..... sorry for unburdening on you guys...... :weep: :weep: :weep:
sb001f8994
12-05-09, 12:41
:hugs:Hi Jojo,
Im so sorry to hear you are suffering like this. I too was convinced I would get breast cancer and it ruled my life. My mum's mum died of breast cancer and my aunt (my nans twin) also died from the same. I have made my breasts sore through self examination, felt umpteen lumps and bumps, noticed every pimple and blemish and caused no end of misery to my family and most of all to myself. Id read that if theres a history of two or more reletives having had the desease you are more likely, but my mind was later put at ease by my cousin who had seen a counsellor as she had same prob as me. She was told with my nan and aunt being twins it was counted as only one gene and we are at no more risk than anyone else. It took lots of convincing but it eventually sunk in, I do still worry and check myself every month and dread finding anything new when I look in the mirror but I try not to think about it too much now.
I do think your doctor is right, you should see a counsellor before you make any life changing decisions. I wish you good luck with your new baby and hope you will soon get some piece of mind.
Best wishes,
Carol x
My breast cancer phobia is ruining my life at the moment, and the only way out I can see is to have my breasts removed completely. I worry about my breasts all day and the rest of my life just sort of fits around it....... this is no way to spend a life. I've spoken to my doctor about it who says she won't even consider referring me for a mastectomy until after councilling and after I've had my baby (i'm currently pregnant with my third child). I understand this (in fact I would like to breast feed my baby before I have a mastectomy), but I am terrified/convinced I will get breast cancer in the next year. I am finding it so difficult to cope at the moment..... sorry for unburdening on you guys...... :weep: :weep: :weep:
Do you have a member of the family who has suffered from this problem? The thing is if this is not the case where do you stop, say you have a mastectomy will your fear of cancer manifest itself in say your liver...what do you do then?
I think you need to have counselling rather than even think about a mastectomy. These women who have had this have done so because they have a genetic link to cancer of the breast.
justbananas
12-05-09, 14:34
Jojo, i also hate to even say this because i know it will sound insensitive, but a mastectomy is NOT the answer. if you have health anxiety (which it sounds like you very much do) - as much as you may not believe this now, you WILL replace this fear with another one once you have nothing left to worry about your breasts, and you will have made a terrible and unnecessary infringement upon your body.
I'm participating in a breast cancer marathon next month and many of the women will be running as survivors with mastectomys, all whom have had no other option. you do have another option, and it's to seek counselling, even if you have to go every day until you move on from this. i'm sorry to be so harsh with you but it is not even close to the answer. i think the same illogical things about my own body but i can't for example cut my brain out, or my heart. this is a sad disease we face, but it's one that can be worked through and cured or at least managed with therapy, meds, and group support, which makes us lucky and should give you the strength to forge on, and try a little bit each day to work through this.
I have to agree with Just Bananas on this one. Have you found a lump? Is there any family history? Or is it just fear?
You MUST get counselling and understand that, because you are pregnant, your hormones are not balanced and will be making you feel infinitely more irrational than usual - your Dr. is quite right (and I suspect you know this) not to even consider referring you.
You are obviously accutely anxious about breast cancer and as others have said, if you have your breasts removed, then that anxiety will just spread to another part of your body.... trust me, I know - I have had potential cancer in most parts of my body!
You have had two other children and know how you feel when you're pregnant, with each pregnancy the tiredness gets stronger and much worse (especially as you have two others to look after too...) and your feelings and emotions will be heightened considerably by both tiredness and hormones.
Breast feed your baby, try counselling - but hold onto your boobs.... as anyone who HAS had breast cancer will tell you - you don't have them removed unless you have no choice...
Poor you - it sounds like you're going through a really rough time - just post on here all the time - people will really look after you whilst you're going through it all.
xx
Just my added two cents, Bex and Bananas said it all so well. What I would add is that no doctor would remove a body part just based on a patient's fear of something happening. He could get sued..it would be a totally immoral thing and he could get sued.
It's not about your breast..it's about the fear that has to be worked on because like everyone said (and what happens with me too), it will be another body part we focus on if that one is gone or fixed. Why we do this to ourselves, I am still trying to figure out. Hopefully, we will, as a group.
Thank you everyone. I just feel so desperate at the moment....... I can't stop crying and I have just found yet another lump, it is just rediculous..... i feel like i am being tortured. i know my doctor won't be able to feel it too (you have to feel right in there, deep in the breast, at a ceratin pressure and angle).
I actually disagree about the wisdom of a mastectomy (I suppose I would!)...... I do understand waht everyone means, but the risk of breast cancer is real (for all women). Most women feel attached to their breasts, though, and losing them is a great price to pay. But I hate mine. I always have. They don't even look that nice. I'd have a reconstruction for my husbands sake........... but they are something I would be glad to be rid of - I know I would have no regrets....... and finally the phobia - and the very real threat of breast cancer - would be over. I will do it - although I'll have to pay for it (eek!!!) - but I just can't imagine how I am going to get through the next year........... every day I am panicking over some lump or other....... it's just so, so awful.....
xxxx
bottleblond
12-05-09, 19:27
Jo
Surely if you get regular check up's then that would be enough to keep on track of any problems that may arise.
I have a friend who did the exact same as you are considering. She had both breast removed and even had her overies removed. Since then she has had problem after problem and has been in and out of hospital to have these rectified.
Ok i do understand your fear BUT cancer can hit any part of the body and by removing healthy parts won't prevent that.
Sorry if that sounds harsh hun but i saw what my friend has gone through and it's so not worth it.
Lisa
xxx
nomorepanic
12-05-09, 19:36
Hi Jo
I cannot imagine how bad you must feel to want to do this but what worries me the most is that once you have the breasts removed your worries will move on to other things and where does it end?
Personally I think you need some help/therapy for the underlying issue of cancer worries and not removing body parts.
Please try this route first.
What if you wanted further kids in the future as well?
Hi
I can understand you having breast surgery as you don't like your breasts and I can understand women who have their breasts removed when lots of close family members get breast cancer, but in your case what about if you have your breasts removed and then you start thinking another part of your body is diseased? what happens then? do you have that part taken off?
Your breasts are very probably likely to be lumpy due to pregnancy and milk glands.
I hope you receive counselling before any doctor seriously ever considers doing the operation.
Have you had breast screening?
Hugs to you :hugs:
:hugs: Hey Jojo, my heart goes out to you,really it does. Like our other members I think that your health anxiety needs to be addressed. A mastectomy is not an option as far as I am concerned. If you do regular breast examinations once a month after your period & have mammograms as advised,surely any significant changes to your breast tissue will be evident?
You have mentioned that you are pregnant at the moment - remember that your breasts undergo changes during pregnancy to prepare you for feeding your baby so they may be more "lumpy" than usual. I understand how trapped you feel by this fear that permeates every aspect of your life sucking the joy from life - well Girl - have you had counselling? It may just help!
xxxBlot
Hi all - thanks again for your support - it really does mean such a lot to me. As for screening - I'm not old enough to have mammograms (you have to be 40 for them to be useful, apparently), but I do get ultrasounds every three months (I know! this is how bad I am!).
Bottleblond, I'm really interested to know what problems your friend had??
Thank you so much again everyone, you are great......
xxxx
And p.s - yes I have had councilling - and I am due to have more......... but it doesn't take this awful fear away........ :-(
bottleblond
12-05-09, 21:13
Hi Jo
Well after the op, all seemed to be ok till she got home. She appeared to have an infection so had to go back into hospital to have a drain inserted into the wound to draw out fluid and also to go on an antibiotic drip.
She was back out the hospital for about ten days when the infection appeared on the other side and the same procedure was done again.
After everything had settled, she seemed to have a banana shaped lump on one of her wounds. It was swollen and extremely painfull. Again they operated to get rid of it.
More recovery time later and now eventually she went in to have the implants inserted. She has so many scars on her breast are now that the implants don't even look normal.
She spend more tim in hospital that out it over a very very long period of time and she has two young children.
She has had further surgery to prevent cancer she may never have got it in the first place or she could get it in a part of her body that can't be removed. Please please try to think of the consequences before going under the knife hun.
Lisa
xxx
I am in such a panic about a breast lump that i almost can't see straight. On the one hand, it seems that I am being iration al because I have had the lump for years and it has been biopsied and found to be a benign fibroadenoma and I had a breast ultrasound last friday, which showed it had not grown.......... BUT I am terrified that the radiologist was looking at a different lump and that the one i can feel is cancer. i think it is in the same place it has always been but i am not SURE. i think it feels smooth and mobile - but again i'm not sure. I am so scared I just don't know what to do. I am due to have another scan in a couple of months (my cancer phobia is so acute i wanted a mastectomy - my dr has ordered regular scans as a compromise) - but i don't know how i can wait that long. there is no point going to my doctor because she will not be able to feel it (I am breastfeeding so it is very hard to feel) and she will just point out I have 'the most checked breasts' she knows, so there is 'no need to worry'. sorry for the rant. I know I sound mad. I don't expect anyone to reply, i just feel so awful I had to tell someone. xx:weep::weep:
Aw sweetie
Thats anxiety doing that I promise. Its causing you too think differently about something that doesnt usually bother you.
Its all been checked so in reality its fine, its just in your 'what if' anxiety state that you are losing the confidence in the fact that its okay. Try ur very best to think about other stuff for a while and I bet your view of it all starts to lighten and you get a more balanced view of the situation again.
Hope your okay luv
lISA
XXXXX:hugs:
thank ypu so much or replying lisa - everyone on this site is so kind it makes me cry.....
xxx
Today I have been obssessively feeling my underarm lymphnodes - i am sure one is bigger than the other and that it could be a sign of breast cancer..... My doctor says they feel normal, but I thouight they shouldn't be able to be felt at all....... is this true?? Can anyone else feel lympnodes under their arms? I must admit I do have to try quite hard to find them.... but I am so scared about it all the same...
Thank you!
xx
I wouldn't worry at all. The glands under my arms are HUGE, seriously they are like jelly bean size, have been for many years, and my GP reassured me a long time ago that they were fine.
Don't worry, trust your GP xx
MandySlade
13-02-10, 20:31
First of all, when you constantly prod lymph nodes, they swell. It's an absolute fact.
Secondly, if your doctor told you it's fine, chances are it is. Lymph nodes are one of the most often checked parts of the body by doctors. They are highly trained to do so. they feel hundreds of lymph nodes a month, if not more.
Dont' feel bad though, lymph-node-freak-out is something i personally, as well as plenty of other HA sufferers have fretted over. Trust me, I have one in the back of my neck that swells all the time. Doctors have told me it's nothing, but every once in awhile my anxiety will spike over it.
I Know this is a very old thread but I can't tell you how much better I feel after reading it! Thanks x
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