darkphantom
02-08-05, 19:12
this is getting stupid, i still not feeling right, last nite was really hard and i had to fight so hard not to drink again and i didnt drink.
But i hit my hand again the knuckle is swollen again and i hit the other hand as i got upset at work.
i still not feeling great with the health probs, they want me to go and have this smear but dont want to as scares me id rather not no if there is a problem as i couldnt put up with more ill health, so best not to know.
i just hate the nite times i sit there thinking of things ive tried to do some of my hobbies but cant. im doing two home study courses in writing short stories and creative writing for magazines but have got behind. a magazine has took interest in a article ive written but i cant get motivated to get out and take the photos needed. i am also doing a cartooning and caricature course as i would like to do this as a living.
Ive also been out buying the afterlife books again this is what i did last time, so far ive got about 15 of them, steve doesnt like me reading them. its just nice to no what awaits me. is that bad.
suppose got another lonely night tonight i hope it isnt as bad as last nite, im so tired but cant sleep for long.
i thinking of you all and missing you all
susie
But i hit my hand again the knuckle is swollen again and i hit the other hand as i got upset at work.
i still not feeling great with the health probs, they want me to go and have this smear but dont want to as scares me id rather not no if there is a problem as i couldnt put up with more ill health, so best not to know.
i just hate the nite times i sit there thinking of things ive tried to do some of my hobbies but cant. im doing two home study courses in writing short stories and creative writing for magazines but have got behind. a magazine has took interest in a article ive written but i cant get motivated to get out and take the photos needed. i am also doing a cartooning and caricature course as i would like to do this as a living.
Ive also been out buying the afterlife books again this is what i did last time, so far ive got about 15 of them, steve doesnt like me reading them. its just nice to no what awaits me. is that bad.
suppose got another lonely night tonight i hope it isnt as bad as last nite, im so tired but cant sleep for long.
i thinking of you all and missing you all
susie