still trying to convince myself ill be ok pregnant

[peach]

i turn 35 in a few days, and im still trying to convince myself it will be ok to try to fall pregnant....im so desperate to have a baby, but still after all these years so terrified.....

im scared im not healthy enough to be ok through prenancy

im scared of birth- c section for me-still scared

im scared of miscarriage possiblilty....

im scared ill have a stroke or something during pregnancy...

im scared i might go crazy from being pregant...

and most of all..im terrifed ill miss out on being a mum...:weep:


hope i dont miss the boat....i got an awsome hubby whos ready to go when i am, just cant seem to say those words...lets try.....

[PHOBIA MAN]

you've given several reason why you don't want to be pregnant, NOW tell us all what you and your husband will gain by being a loving parents, what you will call the child, how they'll look, first words, steps, christmas, the tooth fairy, school, you see you have all your focus on why to not have a baby instead of ramping up why to have one, not only that but you are playing the what if game and this is a destructive thought process that you can easily get waaay out of control. try using BUT after a negative what if eg.
im scared im not healthy enough to be ok through prenancy "BUT even African women have perfect children and I'm a western woman with nutrician and doctors etc"

im scared of birth- c section for me-still scared "BUT I'm more likely to have a natural birth"

im scared of miscarriage possiblilty...."BUT I'm more likely to go full term and have a lovely baby for us"

im scared ill have a stroke or something during pregnancy..."BUT I'm more likely to be just fine"

im scared i might go crazy from being pregant..."BUT I'm more likely to be perfectly sane and fine"

tip the balance to the plus side by concentrating on what it means to be a mum. Go in your mind to 18 months from now, imagine holding that perfect baby, see those prescious smiles, see your husband holding his child, the wonderful possibilities are endless, now go back and send a message to yourself in March 2009 and tell the younger you all the wonders that will come and how being pregnant leads to this, pass on the wisdom of a loving mother to the doubter.
The fact that you are preparing for pregnancy (albeit a bit negative) means you'll make a great mum, I wish you both all the best!!! DO IT!!!!

[name]

Hi peach im a mum i had a baby 15 mths ago i can completely understand wat u are saying hun. Pregnancy can often be a very scary thing so many wat ifs going thru ur head like i was. I also had a section. There are things u can do to make ur self that wee bit healthier like taking folic acid excersing and starting a good diet lots of veg fruit etc. I promise u u will not go mad crazy anything like that but i understand i had all these fears wen i was pregnant but i was fine my only regret it that i let all this stuff get the better of me and i cudnt enjoy my pregnancy. Ur fears are normal hun i think we all fear a lot of these things . Maybe chatting to a councilor abour fears before u try for a baby may be helpful as u can work on ur fears and get comfortanle with them and then try and u will be able to enjoy being pregnant I wish u the best hun. O btw im 33 and i hope one day to have one more so i hope that this helps some wee bit :)

[PUGLETMUM]

:hugs: dear peach, still sending you hugs and still with you on this one.im always here if you want a chat:hugs:

[ElizabethJane]

I had a very healthy baby at aged 36 years by IVF. He is now eleven years old. Your pregnancy would be classed as high risk owing to your age but there are many women out there having their first babies well into their forties. Best wishes.

[jojo2316]

I soooo understand where you are coming from. I am six weeks pregnant and terrified of all the things you mention. I just can't imagine how I will get through th enext 8 months. Part of me thinks I won't........
PM me if you want to chat......
xxxxx