help i feel like im going mad

[vickykelly]

Hi can anyone help me, I have suffered from panic disorder/anxiety disorder for years have been on dothiepin for about 6 years 75mg at night. I got promoted last year and was doing really well and this week has been hell.. I have had to come out of work twice and people are starting to wonder what im doing, I feel dizzy all the time my head hurts i feel sick and generally unsteady on my feet. I also take zopiclone every night as I dont sleep have been for 4 months! I love my job and dont want to lose it. I have had blood test and nothing comes back abnormal so am at a loss.. I dont want to keep going back to doctors with same thing.. the problem is now I am associating work with that feeling and really struggling... anyone have any tips?

[bishops]

Hi, yes i love (sometimes hate) my job and perhaps because of this you get the what if? i lost my job, i cant cope because of my anx. All this just adds to the already high level of anx and panic in us, how we get rid of it imnot sure yet, but im sure as hell not just gonna let it beat me. IM HAVING A 2 WEEK BREAK ive been honest with my boss why and all she wants is for me to get back when im better ( i feel needed) which helps. IMSURE ALL all the things you are getting are anx and panic but i know how hard that is to belive when it happens. Keepgoing back to the doc thats why we pay our NI , they really dont mind, and if you are not happy with your doc or treatment change them... tony

[vickykelly]

thanks hun, i actually feel sick all the time and dizzy when i stand up, my hubby doesn't get it i dont think, my head is pounding and i just feel sick, problem i have is that its happening at home now to... normally its just work with a headache etc and some days are better than others but today was awful, i really dont want to associate these feelings with work i have no doubt i can do the job( i have 13 peeps work for me) i guess really i just need someone that understands what its like and for me to rant at.... sometimes i want to cry sometimes I want to run away and sometimes i feel i cant go on like this anymore....... the other problem is that when im like this i think allsorts are wrong with me and that makes me worse!! how did it ever get to this.... it makes you feel really rubbish... do you get like that to?

[bishops]

Yes i do feel rubbish, silly,a wimp, lost you know all the negatives, but i do know that its NOT MY FAULT, it is a illness, and to be honest i think we all do b;;;dy well just to put one foot in front of the other sometimes let alone hold a job down and have a family. Having this time off im now getting PA more at home so at least i know its not just at work. Good days bad days yep that sounds about right, even on a good day you can have a small setback to spoil all the good work cant you? Guess we just have to keep on trying to do all the right things, i know how hard it is and belive me days like today i just wanna shut myself away'

[vickykelly]

woke up this morning feeling the same as I did yesterday... hubby wants to call doctor, me I know what they will say seems pointless, have worked myself up into a frenzy thinking something is horribly wrong, when I sit and be rational i know its just in my head... hypnotheraphy a few years ago helped but its so expensive.. have a hair appointment now hoping it will make me feel better however three attempts to get out the door is not good.... not a good place to be.. how are you feeling this morning? your right hun its not our fault but I feel like a nut nut... thought I had beaten this once.. now on more pills than I have ever been and thinking I dont want to live like this. yet I have so much to live for.. ever feel like its an ever decreasing circle?... hope it helps to put my feelings down on here?