View Full Version : Constant derealisation, any tips

13-04-09, 17:15
hey Guys,

Anyone know any tips how to crack out of derealisation that has been constantly their for 2 weeks now. Please dont say breath calmley or anything, because people with this feeling constantly know even when your calm the world doesnt seem real.

anyome with any tips how they got through it would be great coz i feel like i cant even leave the house at the moment. Also anyone took any meds that help with this?

My family and doctors still think its more likely to be vertigo but now im weighing up all options. whatever it is it keeps sending me into panick attacks because i hate what im feeling.

13-04-09, 17:44
I had derealization and depersonalisation that lasted for a while when I was very unwell with anxiety. As soon as the anxiety began to ease, do the derealization feelings and I have never had them since.
The only way I dealt with these feelings was to read a lot about them - that helped greatly as after I had read and was told by my counsellor that they are a very common part of anxiety, the scariness faded.
It was when I didnt know what these feelings were that scared me - I really thought I was going mad.
Once I knew what they were about I felt a lot less scared, so that made me less anxious, and then as I became less anxious the feelings went, never to return so far.
I was told to just let the feelings come, accept them for what they are, and tell yourself that its just anxiety, and that you are not going mad.
I found that walking a lot daily really helped me and any form of exercise - I dont know why this helped so much but it did reduce them I found.
I also found that distraction really helped. Once I felt the strange feelings descend I would either read, go on the net, watch a dvd, talk to people - I just did everything there was to ignore it. It was a bit like a panic attack in its scariness.
I know when people tell you to breathe this way and that when you are caught up in the middle of it is not so easy to do and I wont tell you to do that - you know all that anyway.
The feelings are very scary and disturbing I know but you wont have the feelings forever. Mine did go without medication and have never returned, so there is hope.
There are some very good articles on the net about derealization and depersonalisation and some books too.
Do you take any medications at all? or do any self help?
I found the difference between vertigo and these feelings to be very different in a lot of ways but thats just my experience.
Hopefully your feelings will pass soon for you.

13-04-09, 17:57
I dont take any meds at the moment but planning on going to the doctors to get some 2morrow. its really starting to upset me . Just been seeing a girl i really like for 6 weeks now and dont know whether to end it with her because i feel like i cant go to the cinema or cant go for a drink because of this derealisation feeling and anxiety attacks and its unfair on her. Anyone know if its anti-depresents i would need or anti-anxiety drugs which will work best for my situation. I have read so much about anxiety and done soo much research in the last 2 weeks because im soo scared, but still feel asif i none the wiser.

13-04-09, 18:07
Your gp is the best one to ask about what meds you need.
I got through how I felt by taking no medication and eventually the feelings went.
However medication may help you- you dont have to suffer due to how you feel.
Have you explained to your girlfriend how you feel? Its not for me to say but what do you gain from ending your rship with your girlfriend? If she cares for you and is understanding then I am sure she will understand and be there for you.
The reason for derealization and depersonalisation is a symptom of anxiety causing part of our brain to basically go on a go slow due to how stressed out it is.
The feelings you get are caused by that.
The feelings are not physically harmful and you wont go crazy.

13-04-09, 18:11
thanks alot poppy u are actually making me feel abit better about it. can i ask you what feelings you had with de-realisation, here are mine :

- obviously i feel out of body and mine
- things dont look real
- things seem to be very unstable-
- if i look at the floor it can seem to come up to my face
- if i look at somthing busy its like it can start swirling
- loud noises or high pitch noises and flashing are awful to me at moment

These sound about right?

13-04-09, 18:13
also my girlfriend is very understanding.....but how do i keep bailing on dates because i feel so horrible. Before this started 2 weeks ago she said i was the funnist guy she had ever met and now i feel like a grandad. and i cant expect her to keep with me if she sees me maybe once every 2 weeks if she is lucky?

13-04-09, 19:08
Hi again :)
You asked what symptoms I had with derealization and depersonalisation.
Mine were:
...like how I imagine it would be to be having a bad time on drugs
...like the world was a gloomy grey or sepia colour
...like I was not part of reality - I could be sitting in a room full of people and although people would be talking to me and I was amongst them, I felt like I was disconnected from them
...like I was trapped in a sickly dream like state - like that feeling when you are waking from a nightmare
...like I was not connected to the here and now
...like I was floating and the floor seemed uneven and like the walls were closing in and out on me
....I could look at objects and they didnt 'seem real' - and I would look at houses and they would look 'empty' (sounds mad I know)
...I found it very hard to be around any loud noises and although I tried hard to distract myself I found it hard to concentrate too. I had to have a lot of rest and quiet.
Overall the sensations made me feel like I was going mad, and I would have this horrid sickly nauseaus feeling too and often would cry, get distressed and be sick.
It took about a month for me but sometimes this can be shorter or longer.
It wont last forever and it will go - mine went and it has never returned a year later, so have hope and tell yourself it wont last.
I never took medication back then but looking back I wish I had cos I need not have suffered so much.
When you go to see your gp, tell him everything, explain your feelings and he will be able to help you. CBT really helped me with derealization a lot.
As regards your girlfriend, I can understand your concerns but if it were me as a girlfriend I would rather my boyfriend explain how he was feeling than him just ditching me. You may find your girlfriend stands by you and supports you. Explain to her that as you are not feeling so great now you may not always be able to see her but that doesnt mean you cant keep in touch with her - could she come to see you? You may feel like you have lost your personality a bit now - I was exactly the same - I was so scared I dont think I smiled or laughed for ages and yet my personality is normally bubbly and outgoing. I was petrified at times. You will get your funny personality back again and it will not always be like it is now for you. If ever you need to ask me any further questions just feel free to send me a message.
Keep posting and let us know how you get on.

13-04-09, 19:42
also my girlfriend is very understanding.....but how do i keep bailing on dates because i feel so horrible. Before this started 2 weeks ago she said i was the funnist guy she had ever met and now i feel like a grandad. and i cant expect her to keep with me if she sees me maybe once every 2 weeks if she is lucky?

if it was a 'physical' illness would you finish with your girlfriend ? I guess not. So what's the difference? Be open and honest with her. You owe it to yourself and her. Take care x

17-04-09, 21:58
Hi Lawton, thanks for the link to this thread. I do share most of these feelings so I must be suffering from this too. It really helps to hear from someone that has gotten over it. I hope you can soon be free of it too. I just wanted to add, that I ope you don't split up with your girlfriend over it because then this damned anxiety has won and I would hate to see that. I am sure she will understand and it may help to ease the stress by talking to her about it. Maybe its because of this new relationshi you are feeling so anxous. She may be able to help you through it, what have you got to lose? God luck with it hun. x

17-04-09, 22:47
Hi Lawton, having read up on derealisation and depersonalisation, I realise I have suffered intermittently with these, usually when mentally exhausted, very highly anxious or on medication. I am suffering from a bit of derealisation now which has come from out of the blue but is linked to tiredness and anxiety.

I was always scared of these conditions until I read about them and realised I have had them before. They tend to disappear on their own. They are not harmful, they do not make you more ill and they don't hang around forever.

I'm not sure what you can do to treat them other than stay calm, remember that they will pass, and "ground" yourself in reality by remembering that they are harmless and are simply an illusion that will fade away on their own. They always do.

Honestly mate, I have even had them after migraines (only just realised it now) and they are nothing to worry about. Even if they do feel a bit weird. :)

18-04-09, 18:53
Hi Lawton, Have a look at the link below. This has helped me over the years. I have been this way (had Depersonalisation) on and off for 3 years now following a breakdown 3 years ago. I have to keep reminding myself that "It" is not going to harm me and that I am not going to go crazy and that I am perfectly safe. Just in the last couple of months or so, I am getting less scared by this and can do most things now, although I am still not 100%. This morning I walked round Preston City Centre would you believe. I felt unreal for an hour or so but the more you are interested in what you are doing and whats happening around you, and you stop struggling and fighting with how you are feeling, the better you will be, as I was this morning. We walked right from the Railway Station to the Market. A year or so ago, that would have felt like a million miles. Today it wasnt so much of a problem and I just "went" with the unreality till it disolved.