Anzie2008
15-04-09, 00:07
Hi all :)
Hope everyone is doing ok.
I joined this forum before xmas, as I was suffering with general anxiety and intrusive thoughts. It took a lot of hard work and lots and lots of patience, but by New Year, I was feeling much happier and healthier and I'd finally learnt to control my thoughts, and- if I had a bad thought or image- to simply ignore it. I can only thank the wonderful people on this site for such a recovery, :flowers:; it was just so reassuring to know that I wasn't alone.
Now I'm back with a whole new problem!!! I still suffer with general anxiety day-to-day, and I often struggle with dizzyness and other balance problems, which are all anxiety related. Just recently though; after a series of stressful events in my life, I feel like I'm beginning to lose my grip again!!
Back in March, my Nan was diagnosed with cancer. This has obviously been very stressful for the entire family; especially my Mum who has bi-polar and has been very depressed lately. Whilst this was going on, a very close friend of mine (who had been my biggest support whilst my Nan was in hospital) had a breast cancer scare. Thankfully it turned out to be a benign cyst, but at the time, the ordeal was still traumatic. Just a few weeks after this, my Mum became very unwell and run-down, and had to undergo hospital tests and it was feared that she too could have had cancer!! :wacko: Again, thankfully, it turned out to be a controllable condition and not cancer as first thought. However, as I'm sure you can imagine, this ordeal was still very stressful to me. Whilst all this was going on, I was trying my best to carry on with my last year of A Level, and attempting to sort out stuff for University. I was also having problems with someone I'd been seeing... :wacko:
All of this has been deeply unsettling. However, whilst I was still going about my day-to-day business; such as school and going out with my friends, it didn't seem to be affecting me as much as it could have been. Generally, I was keeping busy and able to keep my head up.
It's all gone wrong in the past two weeks though, whilst I've been off on my easter holiday !!! :weep: Whilst I should be enjoying time off school, I've found myself utterly riddled with anxiety. My mood has hit an alltime low, I feel completely frustrated and aggitated every single day, and my thoughts have been straying. I've felt completely spaced out, detached from what's going on around me, and very short of patience. I also feel overly sensitive about everything !!! For example, my mate was telling me about a horror film she'd seen where a young boy had been posessed, and afterwards, I just couldn't get it out of my head. I kept thinking about it; thinking what it would be like to be posessed, and what would happen if it happened to me!! I know that sounds absolutely crazy, but I was genuinely getting scared about what would happen, the likelihood of it etc. It sounds stupid, but I was genuinely scared thinking "what if it happened to me, would I just go mental? How would it happen?". To make it worse, I then went and had a dream about staying the night in a haunted house. GREAT. :wacko: Seriously, I feel like I've just lost the plot all over again. My imagination has just gone on overdrive. Why am I suddenly so sensitive about things ?! It seems to be worse at night too... when I get up in the morning, I feel quite positive and keep my mind on the day and what I'm doing, but slowly the anxiety builds through the day, so that by the night time, I'm aggitated and snappy and very anxious about everything, with horrible thoughts going through my head.
Do I sound absolutely crazy saying all that?! It's the first time I've wrote it all out... I'm just hoping someone will be able to reassure me and make me feel like I'm not the only person who gets aggitated and over sensitive.:weep:
I really do feel like my most anxious times are when my mind is unoccupied and I'm off school!! It's like all of the stress from the past month or so has just caught up with me all at once & it's slowly driving me mad :S!!
I'm feeling ok tonight as it happens, because I've been out for dinner for my friend's birthday and it really helped me to chill out and I actually felt normal!!!
Please please pleasee...
Any help or reassurance you could give me would be greatly appreciated.
I'm sorry this post is so long, I had to get it all off my chest.
x lots of love & best wishes to you all x:flowers:
Hope everyone is doing ok.
I joined this forum before xmas, as I was suffering with general anxiety and intrusive thoughts. It took a lot of hard work and lots and lots of patience, but by New Year, I was feeling much happier and healthier and I'd finally learnt to control my thoughts, and- if I had a bad thought or image- to simply ignore it. I can only thank the wonderful people on this site for such a recovery, :flowers:; it was just so reassuring to know that I wasn't alone.
Now I'm back with a whole new problem!!! I still suffer with general anxiety day-to-day, and I often struggle with dizzyness and other balance problems, which are all anxiety related. Just recently though; after a series of stressful events in my life, I feel like I'm beginning to lose my grip again!!
Back in March, my Nan was diagnosed with cancer. This has obviously been very stressful for the entire family; especially my Mum who has bi-polar and has been very depressed lately. Whilst this was going on, a very close friend of mine (who had been my biggest support whilst my Nan was in hospital) had a breast cancer scare. Thankfully it turned out to be a benign cyst, but at the time, the ordeal was still traumatic. Just a few weeks after this, my Mum became very unwell and run-down, and had to undergo hospital tests and it was feared that she too could have had cancer!! :wacko: Again, thankfully, it turned out to be a controllable condition and not cancer as first thought. However, as I'm sure you can imagine, this ordeal was still very stressful to me. Whilst all this was going on, I was trying my best to carry on with my last year of A Level, and attempting to sort out stuff for University. I was also having problems with someone I'd been seeing... :wacko:
All of this has been deeply unsettling. However, whilst I was still going about my day-to-day business; such as school and going out with my friends, it didn't seem to be affecting me as much as it could have been. Generally, I was keeping busy and able to keep my head up.
It's all gone wrong in the past two weeks though, whilst I've been off on my easter holiday !!! :weep: Whilst I should be enjoying time off school, I've found myself utterly riddled with anxiety. My mood has hit an alltime low, I feel completely frustrated and aggitated every single day, and my thoughts have been straying. I've felt completely spaced out, detached from what's going on around me, and very short of patience. I also feel overly sensitive about everything !!! For example, my mate was telling me about a horror film she'd seen where a young boy had been posessed, and afterwards, I just couldn't get it out of my head. I kept thinking about it; thinking what it would be like to be posessed, and what would happen if it happened to me!! I know that sounds absolutely crazy, but I was genuinely getting scared about what would happen, the likelihood of it etc. It sounds stupid, but I was genuinely scared thinking "what if it happened to me, would I just go mental? How would it happen?". To make it worse, I then went and had a dream about staying the night in a haunted house. GREAT. :wacko: Seriously, I feel like I've just lost the plot all over again. My imagination has just gone on overdrive. Why am I suddenly so sensitive about things ?! It seems to be worse at night too... when I get up in the morning, I feel quite positive and keep my mind on the day and what I'm doing, but slowly the anxiety builds through the day, so that by the night time, I'm aggitated and snappy and very anxious about everything, with horrible thoughts going through my head.
Do I sound absolutely crazy saying all that?! It's the first time I've wrote it all out... I'm just hoping someone will be able to reassure me and make me feel like I'm not the only person who gets aggitated and over sensitive.:weep:
I really do feel like my most anxious times are when my mind is unoccupied and I'm off school!! It's like all of the stress from the past month or so has just caught up with me all at once & it's slowly driving me mad :S!!
I'm feeling ok tonight as it happens, because I've been out for dinner for my friend's birthday and it really helped me to chill out and I actually felt normal!!!
Please please pleasee...
Any help or reassurance you could give me would be greatly appreciated.
I'm sorry this post is so long, I had to get it all off my chest.
x lots of love & best wishes to you all x:flowers: