lonely
18-04-09, 10:29
i have ben having these things in my head what ive called thoughts even though i think its like someone else telling me to do it
last night i was sitting there and while going through things i remembered something from when i was younger, which i seemed to have blocked out or grown out of but now its back worse then ever
up until i was about say 16 i always used to get this thought/voice of someone else saying about a certain member of my family whome i loved you wish they were dead, they'd be constant especially at night, i used to say to myself no you dont ignore it ignore it, it wasnt nice
now i get the thoughts/voice telling me to do hurt to myself or take pills, i'll not say much more as know can't comment on these on here but you'll proberly know what i mean
its just i remembered the same thing from when younger and now worried as its the same thing back:weep: :weep: im scared if i tell the pshychiatrist or cpn etc they will think i am a nutter
but i now think they are not always my own thoughts and why i get confused and soo upset
and how i could forget such a thing from when younger i do not know its sounds stupid doesn't it, but somehow i blocked it from my memory
last night i was sitting there and while going through things i remembered something from when i was younger, which i seemed to have blocked out or grown out of but now its back worse then ever
up until i was about say 16 i always used to get this thought/voice of someone else saying about a certain member of my family whome i loved you wish they were dead, they'd be constant especially at night, i used to say to myself no you dont ignore it ignore it, it wasnt nice
now i get the thoughts/voice telling me to do hurt to myself or take pills, i'll not say much more as know can't comment on these on here but you'll proberly know what i mean
its just i remembered the same thing from when younger and now worried as its the same thing back:weep: :weep: im scared if i tell the pshychiatrist or cpn etc they will think i am a nutter
but i now think they are not always my own thoughts and why i get confused and soo upset
and how i could forget such a thing from when younger i do not know its sounds stupid doesn't it, but somehow i blocked it from my memory