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eurotrashcub
22-04-09, 17:02
Hello everybody

Some of you might know how obsessed I am with auditory hallucinations/hearing voices, even though I have never hallucinated.

I have decided to start this poll to find out your experiences with this topic.

This poll is anonymous and you can choose more than one reply.

eurotrashcub
22-04-09, 18:16
It appears i have posted this thread totally in the wrong place

Any admind out there could move it to general anxiety for me???

happyone
22-04-09, 18:24
Hi,
I ticked that yes I do and I have a psychotic disorder, or rather, I have a mh condition which can see me becoming psychotic. I am not psychotic all the time though. For example, I have heard them quite a bit over the past few days but I am not psychotic...... yet:winks: However, hearing voices is very common.
Maybe you will find this helpful? http://www.hearing-voices.org/

Happyone
xx

eurotrashcub
22-04-09, 18:31
Thank you happy one

i have never heard voices (well only while falling asleep and once my name being called), i am just scared of schizophrenia and obsessed about them for a few months. I thought i was going to hear them

So would you mind sharing more about your psychotic episodes? i have never spoken to someone who has suffered psychotic symptoms and i am both curious and scared to ask!

happyone
23-04-09, 14:35
I don't mind sharing them at all. I have bipolar mood disorder and have had associated psychotic experiences.

My first one was noises coming out of my car seat! I was high and had gone on a drive round the country. I was in a lay by in the middle of nowhere with my engine and radio switched off. My mental state was a detachment from reality. I heard these noises coming out of my car seat like a radio, slightly out of tune. It didn't worry me in the slightest, I thought it was the most normal thing in the world. It was only later, I thought 'how odd'

I didn't really have any more until the last few months. I have had several experiences of hearing something during the day. Nothing, concrete, more just a noise that is out of place. like, in a quiet room, sounds of footsteps or a voice of someone that isn't there. It is really hard to explain. It is like I know the voice I am hearing is out of place...say for example...a female singing voice in Tesco. I look round and no one is singing but I know she is at my shoulder. She is no where else in the store, she is at my shoulder...I know she is....but it spooks me to know she isn't really.:wacko:

I watched and tried to kill a spider that was crawling up the wall whilst I was in hospital. I would have had no idea this wasn't real except for the fact that the nurse was asking what I was doing and she assured me there was no spider there. I continued to kill it anyway!

Around Christmas time, I had the scariest experience ever. I was sleeping in the living room as I was having bother sleeping so had gone down to the couch so as not to bother my husband with my tossing and turning. There seemed to be a noise coming from somewhere and I was feeling freaked out. I thought it might be the door rattling in its frame so I got up to check it was properly closed. As I returned to the couch, the christmas tree started to dance! Sounds funny but it was about the most scared I have ever been in my life! It's arms became branches, it developed a big grinning face and it just danced! Don't know how long it went on for but I thought I would die simply from fear!

Then more recently, my auditory hallucinations take the form of people in my bedroom. There are lots of them there and I can hear them all speaking and laughing but I can't make out what they say. It is a bit like being at a party where there is a lot of noise but you can't actually distinguish one noise from another. Yet, it is quiet, like the party is some distance off. I can hear them moving about my floor, laughing, opening and closing my door. Sometimes this has seemed fine and I have coped with it, at others I have become really freaked. On one occassion, I went down to the living room to get away from them but they followed me. I was terrified.
Last week, it was people in my room again but they were menacing and meant me harm. I was under the influence of my night time meds so was unable to get down stairs to get my husband. I wasn't on the verge of sleep as I was able to get up and close the window and ensuite door. I was really scared as my night time meds were knocking me out but I was scared if I went to sleep, they would get me.
Wearing earplugs doesn't stop me hearing them as I have tried. The noises are inside my head so earplugs are no protection. Likewise, a visual hallucination comes from the brain, not the eye.

Because of my more recent episodes, I have had my anti psychotic meds upped as from today.

My episodes are, or have been up til now, quite mild. As I said, people can have psychotic experiences without becoming completely psychotic.

Happyone
xx

eurotrashcub
23-04-09, 17:11
Thanks for sharing that with us.

I have never experienced anything like that although sometimes i have bizarre perceptions/thoughts that i cannot hear but for some reason seem to be perceived as 'louder' than others and i sometimes hear things as i fall asleep. Also i think i might have heard my name being called once, but i am not sure.

The whole thing fascinates me and scares me at the same time but i truly believe that some psychotic symptoms (ie hearing voices, having delusions that do not affect your life) should be considered as a normal part of human existence as it seems they are so common across the population.

Do you mind if i ask you how old you are and what antypsychotic are you taking?

happyone
23-04-09, 18:16
Hi again,

I agree that some experiences that are put down as psychotic experiences should be considered as normal. I think this is one of the arguments of the hearing voices network. Hearing voices in people who are not 'unwell' is so much more common than people realise or having a sense that something is there when others are not aware of it.

I am 37 and on quetiapine.

Happyone
xx

Oceanblue
24-04-09, 08:22
Hiya,

Like Happyone, I too have Bipolar and have had one major psychotic episode and several mild episodes.

Episodes usually happen when I'm under extreme stress.

I experience hallucinations, hear voices and music that are very real.

I become distressed when I hear the music, because it usually sounds very strange and very loud with lots of intense drum beats,.. it always feels like it's leading up to something,... something terrible and that 'something' is going to happen,..it's abit like chanting. It scares me.

Luckily for me,.. my life has been nearly stress free compared to how things once were afew years back and for many years previous to that, and so I have become much better and my recent episodes have been mild.

The medications I used to take were Depakote, Risperdone, Fluoxetine, Diazepam and sleeping tablets.

Now that I'm much better, I only take a very small dose of Fluoxetine, but this is because I have PMDD/Premenstral Dysphoric Disorder. I do have to be careful with this as it can sometimes send me into hypermania.

My partner looks out for signs and knows when I'm feeling unwell/depressed and when I'm Hypermanic, he keeps check. This is when full medication should be taken to stop it from leading into a full blown psychotic episode, but recently I have avoided all of the Bipolar meds because I hate to take them.
Luckily, these mild episodes have subsided before they've become out of control. If Hypermanic, I then feel low for awhile, but seem to recover fairly quickly and then everything seems fine. This is why I've chosen the free route because this often happens.
Hypermania actually helps me in lots of ways - (different story) lol.

I maybe playing with fire, but until the start of another major episode, (touch wood, it doesn't!), I feel stable enough to not take the medications.

P.S If it helps, I've also written in reply to Nikkiniks Thread called - This is it, Im finally going mad, theyre going to take me away:-



Hiya Nikki,

You do sound very distressed and I hope you start to feel better soon.

I just wanted to let you know a little about my experiences of Psychosis, in hope that this could maybe help. I've also spoken to others who have suffered, although not exactly the same, the experiences are very similar in thoughts.

I have Bipolar, and had been through an extremely bad stage afew years ago, where I was hospitalised.

When you mentioned that you were watching the TV on Subtitles and things wasn't making sense. Well,.. I feel that in a Psychotic state everything makes sense but in a completely different light.

Things around,.. words, signs, pictures, Films, TV shows all make sense at the time to you, (only they are seen by you in a kind of surreal way, an entire different way and meaning), but nobody else around.

It's really hard to explain,...an example;

I was watching a film in the day room. I then believed the nurses had put this on especially for me to try and help me remember things, like my childhood and that this film was about me. The little girl in it was acting the role of me.
I then remembered that I had read a book (afew months previous to this time), and then believed my dad was the author of this book, and that this film was a copy from the book.
When my dad came to visit a couple of hours later,.. I was thanking him so much and saying that it's ok. I said thank you for looking after me and that I know you're not my real dad, but it's ok, it doesn't matter, you've been so good to me and helped me, I now know you're really my Psychiatrist.

My poor dad was nearly in tears, I remember he gave me a cuddle and I said, "Thanks so much for helping me Dr Royston".

My dad is my real dad and his name is not Dr Royston ! Only, I truly believed this.

More things that usually happen is that things you read, write, see, your entire surroundings are very surreal, (I can say this by looking back), only at the time they are very real, so real that you do and say strange things and no matter what people say, your state of mind does not change, even with certain medications, sometimes it just has to pass.
I had to be sedated afew times, because I was becoming too out of hand and having little staff at the time was difficult.

I was also grieving/suffering from PTSD, and I became obsessed with white, this is quite embarrassing,.. but what the hell ! I had to climb and walk on anything white, at one point I climbed up ontop of a bathroom :blush:. It had like stages of tile shelving and the ceilings of the rooms were really high, being an old hospital.
I also thought I was an Angel from Heaven and used to wrap myself up in white sheets. OMG !!

Pmsl,.. :unsure: tee hee, Oh jeez,.. gotta laugh now !! Well,... i've got to haven't I ? :roflmao: I'd completely lost the plot .

This stage of Psychosis went on for about a week, though I was in hospital for 4mths due to Depression, PTSD, Anxiety/Panic.

Another day I believed I was in hospital to die from a terrible illness, I believed I was physcially dying from Aids or something and I remember feeling in total devastation, wondering why nobody told me and was crying for my children. This was when my mind was at its worst. I was sent to a room on my own and nurses cleared everything out, curtains, sheets and wardrobe,.. I wasn't even allowed to the toilet,.. (had a pan to pee in):blush: and had to have a nurse sit there in the room with me for afew days and nights.
That time was unbearable.

Psychosis is very strange, really strange,.. and difficult to explain. I guess in another way, you could say it's like a bad trip. If you've ever been silly enough to mess about with them when you were a kid.

I hope that I haven't scared you in anyway,.. I just thought it maybe best to write afew things which happened to me whilst I was going through it, in hope that this could possibly help you.

I hope it has, take good care of yourself xxx:flowers:
__________________

Oceanblue
24-04-09, 10:06
Btw EuroTrash I ticked;

Sometimes I hear music/noises/voices that are not there, (also some visionary hallucinations) rather than the Psychotic Disorder, but they are now usually few and far between.

If I had many 'Major' episodes, I would have ticked Psychotic Disorder, but have luckily only had the one.

I have hope that this will one day soon disappear altogether.:)

eurotrashcub
09-05-09, 17:48
This poll is quite enlightening

It seems more people than I thought experience some unusual perceptions at some point...

Ricard

CJH86
10-05-09, 13:56
Hi...i do hear things from time to time, mainly when im falling asleep or overtired which i'd say is relatively normal. Not so often during the day, it has happened a few times though.

I do get very vivid visual hallucinations mainly in periods of stress/high anxiety that i find quite distressing....sometimes its mild like i'll just look at something and it looks or sounds 'wrong' and i'll go into a panic. Other times its a lot more intense (mainly but not exclusivley at night when im wide awake) there will be faces, things crawling up my wall, flying at my face.....my pillow even started talking to me one night, no kidding! :blush:

I dont have a psychotic illness as far as im aware (just panic disorder, sleep problems and obsessive HA) my dad has panic disorder too and also gets the same problems with hallucinations as me....maybe a genetic component:shrug:. I have a very vivid imagination and have since childhood, interestingly i used to see and hear things a lot more frequently when i was young.

GAD
24-05-09, 23:42
Hi
Sorry i didnt reply to your pm oly ive not been on for ages and after seeing the post from nmp about answering pms only to people you know i thought it best not to. anyway - i thought i would let you know that i have never heard any voices or hullicinated and i have suffered with this fear for nearly 15 years! I think you try to convince yourself through worry and tend to over anylise what your thinking but i can honestly say that to date no matte how much i worried about it, it just didnt happen. i rmember thinking that if i keep worrying about it or thinking it it would eventually happen anyway as i was sending myself round the bend but still it NEVER happened. please try to stop with this fear (easier said than done i know) because i wasted some many years worrying about it and its such a waste. thats not to say my anxity is cured and perhaps i will be back on here in a few weeks seeking advise from you. Try use distraction techniques, this helps.
Hope you feel better soon and i am happy for you to pm me anytime.

gad.:D

Ryan
26-05-09, 03:28
As I am dropping off to sleep I very often hear people calling my name, not sick people but people I havent seen for a long time, like old school friends I havent spoken to in a good while.

Infact a number of times it wakes me up and I say 'YES?' and then I realize nobody is there. I also sometimes hear weird things in the background just like a few words of a sentance, never makes sense...

I don't get freaked out or bothered by it I know its just my mind.


A friend of mine though, he gets full blown visual stuff, almost every night, he can see just about anything, people/things that arent there, things that are there moving about... a wide range of visual hillusinations, and the worst part is for some reason when he gets them he cannot think 'this is just an hilusination' he believes its happening.

GAD
29-05-09, 23:05
This post scares the s**t out of me ryan - surely he must have a more serious illness or does he take drugs??
GAD


This post has been automatically edited by the NMP post filter

kathy.x
31-05-09, 18:04
I sometimes hear things, but i believe it's normal. i sometimes think i hear my phone ringing, or the dishwasher being on or someone saying my name. i think this is normal, as i had it before my anxiety and I am sure other people get it!