mothermac
24-04-09, 02:10
Sorry if this is a long post but I need some answers fast.
I have always been a nervy anxious person,even from childhood and lived my life feeling on edge,I had a bad time at school being bullied in junior school which made it worse and then when I was 11 my father died suddenly whilst working abroad,I didn't get to view the body as he was brough home from a hot country and nobody did and I was kept away from the funeral as my family thought it was best as my mum was in such a state at the time.I didn't suffer too badly through my teen yrs with anxiety(it was there in the background)and I lived a fairly normal life although I was controlled by mother to a certain extent(I won't go into all that as I would be typing forever)but for the past yr or so my anxiety has gone through the roof.I had my daughter 6 yrs ago and my husband says it could be post natal depression but I think it goes deeper.I am getting panic attacks(I even had one at work last week)I cannot sleep on a night until about 3 in the morning when my anxiety tends to get a little easier,I have awful dreams which make me cry sometimes(I have just got up as I dreamt I was waiting ina queue of people to view what was inside my father's coffin)I have palpatations,strange aches and pains,thudding heart at all hrs of the morning,I bite my nails constantly to the distraction of my husband,I worry about losing my husband in a car crash constantly and phone him all the time when he is at work which is making us argue,the list is endless and I am feeling at the end of my tether with it all now.I am going to the docs in the morning as I need and want some answers,I cannot live like this much longer it is like living in hell with no get out clause. I don't know the symptoms of p.t.s.d so have just hazard a guess really,I don't think it could be my father's death as wouldn't it have come on yrs ago just after the hideous event and not 20-25 yrs later? Please could somebody offer any advice as I feel so bad-thanks.xxxxx
I have always been a nervy anxious person,even from childhood and lived my life feeling on edge,I had a bad time at school being bullied in junior school which made it worse and then when I was 11 my father died suddenly whilst working abroad,I didn't get to view the body as he was brough home from a hot country and nobody did and I was kept away from the funeral as my family thought it was best as my mum was in such a state at the time.I didn't suffer too badly through my teen yrs with anxiety(it was there in the background)and I lived a fairly normal life although I was controlled by mother to a certain extent(I won't go into all that as I would be typing forever)but for the past yr or so my anxiety has gone through the roof.I had my daughter 6 yrs ago and my husband says it could be post natal depression but I think it goes deeper.I am getting panic attacks(I even had one at work last week)I cannot sleep on a night until about 3 in the morning when my anxiety tends to get a little easier,I have awful dreams which make me cry sometimes(I have just got up as I dreamt I was waiting ina queue of people to view what was inside my father's coffin)I have palpatations,strange aches and pains,thudding heart at all hrs of the morning,I bite my nails constantly to the distraction of my husband,I worry about losing my husband in a car crash constantly and phone him all the time when he is at work which is making us argue,the list is endless and I am feeling at the end of my tether with it all now.I am going to the docs in the morning as I need and want some answers,I cannot live like this much longer it is like living in hell with no get out clause. I don't know the symptoms of p.t.s.d so have just hazard a guess really,I don't think it could be my father's death as wouldn't it have come on yrs ago just after the hideous event and not 20-25 yrs later? Please could somebody offer any advice as I feel so bad-thanks.xxxxx