I was beaten up, now i can't cope!

[shotokansho]

I suffer with Anxiety and Panic Attacks, i have done for around 8-10 years. Anyway last Saturday night i went out for a 30th birthday. We were having a great night, at around 1am we went out for our taxi. I saw two of my friends having trouble from three men, i went over to see what was going on, the next thing i know i was knocked on conscious. I was struck at the side of the face, near my ear, grabbed my throat and then knocked to the floor. The back of my head bounced off the pavement. Then i was knocked out. When i came round i saw my two friends on the floor, bleeding. I was shaking uncontrollably, i tried to dial 999 but my fingers kept missing the keys. I was crying and eventually got through but couldn't even tell the emergency services where i was because we were 20 miles from home. Thankfully a lady helped me and spoke to them and the ambulance came. I was still shaking and crying and in great pain.
The next day i was at home and woke with dreadful pain near my ear and side of my face, also my neck was agony. I couldn't yawn, cough, swallow. I went to see my GP and just burst into tears. I was sent for x-rays, the soft tissue in my neck is badly bruised and i have a perforated ear drum.
I haven't stop crying since, i am extremely down and even struggling to take my little boy to school. I can't collect my eldest boy from cadets at 9.30pm, i am so frightened. Every time i eat it comes out the other end, i can't sleep and have no motivation. I don't know how to handle this, i know i need to get a grip and carry on as normal but i just can't stop crying. I feel like a nervous wreck.
I don't know if i have posted this is in the right place, but thanks for listening.

[diane07]

Oh how awful that you had to go through this,

I am really sorry.
The only thing i can say is a neighbour of mine went through the same thing a few years back, and it knocked his confidence terribly, i would suggest you go back to the docs and get some sort of help to help you get through this.

It must be so awful to feel the way you do.

best wishes

di xx

[PoppyC]

Hi
Sorry at first I assumed that it was a male who had posted this until I read further on - its even worse when you have been attacked as a female by men! :ohmy:
I am so sorry - I am not surprised you feel as you do! You have been through an awful attack. You must feel really vulnerable and frightened. All the reactions you are showing are perfectly normal considering the circumstances - the shock and horror of it all is bound to make you upset, whether you had anxiety to begin with or not.
Have you got people around you who you can talk to this about and who can help you for now with your little boys?
I do know that Victims Support Groups are very good at listening and for offering help and advice. Maybe you could visit your gp and see what he can suggest too. If the police have been informed you should I think automatically receive some information about Victims Support Groups in the post or the police will be able to offer you some advice about this, other than that Citizens Advice can help regarding getting in touch with Victims Support.
I am so sorry you have been through this traumatic event. Your post made me want to cry
Big Hugs to you :hugs::hugs::hugs:

[Wee-Mee]

:ohmy:

I am so shocked by what has happened to you,and I'm so sorry!

I truly believe in karma and what goes around comes around so hopefully they will get their come upins.

But I agree,there are victim support groups and things for you to talk about things..You can't go on living in fear because of those brutes.

I feel like crying,it's awful how often these horrible things always seem to happen to good wonderful gently people.

I wish you all the best petal and feel free to msg me or anything.

I will listen.

But I would def go back to gp and explain that you are so frightened.

I too thought it was a male posting which I was shocked at enough but to be a feamle and have that happen is a disgrace.

xxxxxxx

[shotokansho]

I just want to cry all the time. I have been to my GP and she suggested i go back on Cipralex, but i aint taken them for years. I know about victim support and have called them. We had a brief chat on the phone and they have given me the number for my local office.
I really don't know what to do, every time i walk past someone in the street i have palpatations. This is stopping me from going out. I do have someone here. But i am hardly talking to her, i don't know why, it's like im in a shell. She is being very patient and helping with my boys...i am grateful but i know i am causing an atmosphere with my low mood.

[PUGLETMUM]

:hugs: i dont think you do need to get a grip!!!! you have been badly assualted by some ******* and you are allowed to feel bad!!!!! please give yourself time to heal physically and emotionally - this is a terrible trauma, that unfortunately many ppl have to deal with these days - im so sorry this happend to you:hugs:

[lorac]

I am so sorry to read this, it is a terrible thing that you have had to deal with caused by horrible people.

I think emmas is right you need time to recover from this horrible ordeal and it certainly isn't about getting a grip.

Many many hugs to you.

Carol xx

[mandie]

Hi

I am so sorry to hear wot u have gone through. Its no wonder u feel like u do.

I was mugged a few years back and for ages after i was scared to walk down the road. I didnt like anyone walking behind me and the slightest sound made me jump.

It did take me a while to get over.

dont be hard on yrself, this will take time to get over.

:bighug1:

love mandie x

[its all good]

Hey kerry, :bighug1: :bighug1:. Am so sorry to hear that this has happened to u. There really are some nasty individuals in this world! I can't imagine what u r going through but i do know that u r a lot stronger then u think and with time and courage u will get through it. I used to volunteer with victim support in my local area and it can help u hun, make the most of whats available to u. I wish u hadn't of had to of been subjected to this violent attack kerry, i hope the people responsible will be punished. U take it easy hun and pm me if u ever need to chat, big hugs and best wishes kayliegh xx

[starlight78]

Hi,

I'm so sorry you've been through such a horrible thing..
You so dont need to get a grip! You have been through a horrible ordeal and have every reason to feel upset.. It will probably take time to get over this and thats normal! Please take it easy and be kind to yourself.
Sending you lots of hugs xx

[shotokansho]

Hey everyone. Thank you so much for all the kind words and best wishes...and especially the big hugs...i can feel them from here.
I was desperate to come on here, the attack happened on Saturday and i had no internet until today, it was horrible. People on here are so supportive.

I dragged myself off to Karate training tonight and i feel in a better mood. It was very hard for me, i had to have someone drive me there and bring me home because i was too frightened to get the bus alone. But when i got going it was okay. All my friends there have been brilliant.

thank you everyone xxxx

[melody]

Hi,

It's good that you are letting it out. That's the first step towards your recovery. I have been attacked by men also. It took a year for the flashbacks to get less strong, but I still keep getting them a bit if I catch stange looking guys perving on me. I don't think it would cause any harm to go on medication for a bit. That's what it's there for, to help us through difficult times. I kept thinking every guy would hurt me if I wasn't with anyone for so long. I got quite aggressive to them actually. If you go through the counsilling or other therapy that you prefer, they will give you a way to let it all out. I promise it will help.

It takes time to let your brain get around the fact that these were just a#$holes. Most men arent like that. Your brain thinks its protecting you. One time a panic attack actually saved me. This stranger guy dragged me into his house because he knew I was really drunk. He was kissing me & I couldn't push him off. He was trying to drag me to the bed & I started shreeking. I started suffoctaing myself & repeating, let me out over & over again, although I was gasping it because I couldn't breathe. He shoved me out again & I ran away as quick as I could. Lots of adrenaline. It was the second time in my life I had been sexually assaulted, the first time was when I was 15. I guess my body knew what was coming & knew what to do the second time instead of just freezing & getting pinned & forgetting how to open my mouth which was getting stuffed with his tounge. as he put his disgusting hands all over every part of my body while I couldn't breathe. I couldn't move. It makes me sick. I didn't know you werent allowed to smile at anyone? I was too shaking & scared to report it, I just ran away. I regret that, because I get scared he did it to some other undeserving victim because I was afraid & it happened in another state & it took so long for me to admit it it felt like it would be too late.

Sorry, that just came out. I know it's hard. You are being hard on yourself like I did to myself. I think every victim does that. Take your time to heal. Let it all out as best as you can. In time things will get easier. It's so unfair that some men think they can just treat women like that & get away with it. They are scum!!! I hope your attackers get what they deserve.

Wishing you the best in your recovery,

Melody

[suzy-sue]

Hi Iam so sorry this happened to you,:hugs: There are some pretty vile people about & I hope they get their just deserts .You will obviously feel very on edge for a while and this is to be expected. Unfortunately its happening everywhere nowadays,a few years back it happened to my son.Victim support is often very good and experienced with this sort of thing.I hope your bruises and ear heal quickly,and you recover from your terrible ordeal soon :bighug1: luv and Hugs SUE x

[Vanilla Sky]

This is awful. You can get help from victim support , they are very supportive. You will come to terms with this but it's going to take time , So sorry for you Love Paige x x

[bobobob]

What can anybody say. I cannot imagine how much it hurt you. Physical and emotionaly. You now need support from family and friends. You need to remember you are special. It will take time for you to get through this hurt.
I can only send you a hug, to make thigs better.
If you feel you need it, your GP can refer you to a counsiling service which may help you talk it out. One to One. It helped me to sort some of my problems. They do not judge just listen in a comfortable room for an hour once a week. It's on the NHS but I was really impressed.
Thinking of you. Bob