should i stay or should i go....need some unbiased advice please

[sam_1]

heya,

I currently livewith my boyfriend, but our relationship has been consumed by arguements in the past few months. therefore i decided i would look for somwhere else to live, now i have found a flat that is perfect for me...they will accept housin benefit and my dog but im now in two minds! since ive been looking weve stopped arguing and things are better. So the thought of missing him is holding me bak.

However the flat is on a bus route and closer to town and my mum whereas the house we live in now, is not and its a hassle to get everywhere. So the ideaof freedom and more independence is incredibly appealing.
Plus im 19 so before i settle down with someone i would like to hav hadmy own place at least once!

But im scared i'll miss him! and im comfortable here, so its the uncertainty thats annoying me!

I basicaly just need some outside advice pleeeeeease, as i am very indecisive.

thanks all!

[melody]

Independence is a good thing. You can decide about the relationship later. It may do some good for each of you to have your own space.

There is no reason why you can't enjoy a little freedom. If you miss him you can visit & he can visit you. Stepping out of your comfort zone can be scary, but it is a necessary part of life we all have to accept. There will be a lot less to fight about if you aren't living together & getting in each others way.

Of course thats only my 2 cents. Whatever makes you happy is the right thing to do.

[PUGLETMUM]

:) yeah i would agree that although your arguments stopped you did plan to leave? maybe the arguments got less because he knew you had decided to go? also like others said you can still see each other, does you havign your own place equal end of relationship? you may get back together or you may jus tmove on with your life - i think being on your own definately helps you to develop as a person:yesyes:

[june]

but our relationship has been consumed by arguments
since ive been looking weve stopped arguing and things are better.
So the thought of missing him is holding me bak

therefore i decided i would look for somwhere else to live,
now i have found a flat that is perfect for me...
they will accept housin benefit
the flat is on a bus route the house we live in now, is not and its a hassle to get everywhere.
the flat is closer to town
and closer to my mum
i would like to hav hadmy own place at least once!
:blush: I just rearranged your post:blush:
Does that help??
Best wishes
June
:hugs:

[bobobob]

Take the flat. It will make him realise what he had. Then he will either come running or not. If he does then its on your terms. If he doesn't then you know it wouldn't have worked out anyway. Simple for me to say I know but you wouldn't want it to go back as it was. Best wishes to you

[sam_1]

oh thank you so much for your opinions, that really helps. and i suppose i have my dog for company! hopefuly he wont bark too much and get me thrown out! that wud not be good. yea and thinkig about it some couples have to move away sometimes for their job or watever and dont c eachothr at all, at least he'll be able to visit and stuff. im just scared of being lonely i think.

thanks!