SarahP
14-05-09, 16:29
I've been behaving so badly towards the people in my life who care about me the most these last couple of days. I told my boyfriend this morning that he should break up with me (actually, I begged him to) and although he didn't do it I still feel awful. Something in my head tells me that if he wasn't around I'd be able to be more self-confident and not rely on him so much. But I know that if I could do that without him, then I can do it with him as well. I jst feel so awful.
Yesterday I screamed at my mum and and when she grabbed my hand to stop me hitting myself, I swore really badly at her, which I never do.
I hate this evil person who seems to be inhabiting my body and mind at the moment. It's not me, but I can't seem to stop being horrible. No wonder I hate myself a lot of the time! :weep:
Sorry, I seem to be posting a lot of miserable stuff at the moment, hope this phase passes soon. I'm trying to hurry it on its way but it's not having any of it...
Yesterday I screamed at my mum and and when she grabbed my hand to stop me hitting myself, I swore really badly at her, which I never do.
I hate this evil person who seems to be inhabiting my body and mind at the moment. It's not me, but I can't seem to stop being horrible. No wonder I hate myself a lot of the time! :weep:
Sorry, I seem to be posting a lot of miserable stuff at the moment, hope this phase passes soon. I'm trying to hurry it on its way but it's not having any of it...