Am I Losing It.?..........

[Nicola_lou]

I'm terrifed of going mad I had a chest exray done, and my sister said that if I keep going to the hospital then they lock me up. She didn't say this to my face. But since then I'm thinking have I been acting crazy I've had anxiety been to dr loads and if they thought I was mad would they have locked me up?
I'm so scared I read that people see things that's not there and its bed time now and I'm afraid to look up or around.
I'm bk in wrk its going ok. But I got brain fog coming again cause I'm getting stressed with this. I got to keep busy all the time. I'm getting better now I can sit through a programme without getting up and doing somwthing to distract myself.
does anyone else ever feel like this? Does it sound like I'm going mad. I don't hear or see things but I don't want to go to that dark place that anxiety had me in either.

[Valka]

Oh hun, it sounds like you're having a really bad time of it at the moment. First of all: You're not "mad", you have a neurological/mental condition which causes you problems but doesn't make you any less of a person, and it doesn't mean you're losing your mind. In fact, worrying about losing your mind is a really common symptom of anxiety! It sounds like your sister doesn't understand what's going on with you - a lot of people don't actually grasp what health anxiety is all about, they think we should just get a grip but unfortunately it doesn't work that way, just like you can't tell someone with asthma to pull themselves together and breathe properly! It's hard to have to explain yourself to other people when you feel bad, but we should never, ever be ashamed of ourselves for having this disorder. I even talk jokingly about my "insanity pills" because I'm not ashamed of the fact that I have a disorder that affects me mentally.
It's good to hear you're on the way to recovery. The evenings/nights can be a really bad time for us because when you lie down in bed it tends to attack you from all sides. You're all alone with your thoughts and that's frightening for people with anxiety. But remember you're not alone really - there's lots of us out there, struggling with the same things, worrying that we're going mad when we're not, worrying we're about to lose it. If you're sitting there worrying about going mad, then I'd say that's a pretty good indication that you're simply being overwhelmed by your own thoughts and anxieties - not going mad.
Massive hug x x x x

[DontLikeWorrying]

I agree -- you're not losing it! Your mind is just very good at thinking way beyond what's actually happening at the moment. Just being aware of your anxiety and having the presence of mind to ponder than possibility means you're not losing it (I think if you really were, it wouldn't even occur to you!). Nights are the worst for me, too, in terms of anxiety...it gets worse and worse the later it gets, but the next day is usually better.

[xBettyBoopx]

Hi Nicola

Madness is something that the people who have it don't talk about it, or think that they have it. Have you been watching Eastenders lately. Well Stacey is getting physcotic (sp) just like her mum, but she doesn't see it.

Anxiety doesn't make you mad, it's a completely different thing altogether. Sorry but your sister is talking out of her arse, she knows nothing.

You say that you are fraid to look up or around, but please do it, you won't see anything, I promise.

This damn anxiety gets us thinking all kind of weird things. It's brain fatigue. I commend you on being at work, well done hun.

Please be reassured that you're not going mad, just your anxious mind playing tricks on you again.
Take care
Love
Els
xxx

[melody]

Hi Nicola,

I talked 2 u in chat. u r very normal. You r scared cause u feel crook. Me too!

Lots of love :)

Melody

[amandaj]

your not going mad anxiety doesnt make us mad just feel poo all the time, hope you feel better soon at end of the day hospitals are there to use if we feel something isnt right
amandax

[Nicola_lou]

Thanks eveyone yes I've been watching eastenders and i thought well I'm not acting like that or am I? But I guess my sister is talking out of her arse. I did look around and no didn't see anything or hear anything. But I feel like I'm losing my mind. I can't be with myself I'm scared of my own thoughts like I can't control with I think.
Why do I feel like this? Its so horrible. But I think the doctors would have said something by now I'm there every week and they just say anxiety.
I just hope I don't lose it, I just want a normal life. When I went to the hospital with chest paij ,y dr said he use to suffer with panic and anxiety in medical school and he don't have them any more so I guess there hope. Just malisous rumours knocking me down.
I can't get into chat cause I'm on my phone so when I sort the internet out, it will be a great comfort.