Missmellowdy
19-05-09, 04:17
Hi all
well first of all, I am so glad that I found this forum and already feel i can "breathe easier" after reading that other people have these same issues that are plaguing my eveyday life. So heres my story so far..its quite long but i guess, id like to vent!
I am a 21 year old female..As a kid I was always very hyper, at 7 i suffered with menigicocal Septicimia and only survived it by the skin of my teeth, ever since then I had recurring issues with getting to sleeping, fear of death and general hyperactivity etc. Psychs all put it down to a a fear of death due to my illness as a younger child. NOW these symptoms all seemed to go away in thje past 5-10 years, Possibly because I started smoking Marijuana and as my new doctor said this was "self medicating" In feb my dad had a heart attack at his 50th birthday party, i lost my job and eveyrthing got very stressful. I started smoking more and also used rec. drugs a few times over the past few months (cocaine & Meth) I have always been against these "hard" drugs asd ive seen what they can do to people, firsthand.
Recentley after my dads heart attack, I started getting very breathless, I am asthmatic so at first I simply put it down to that and took ventolin, but one night I got so worked up I started shaking, crying etc, ect and ended up getting my partner to rush my to the ED. They assumed Astham and gave me a mask, the whole time I thought "this isnt working, this isnt working..it feels like its making me MUCH worse" and i told the nurse that, she then told me that "my oxygen saturation was at 100% so it WAS working" and they then discharged me without even testing for anything more serious. negligent to say the least. ANYWAY after this I began to start haing difficulty swallowing and it seemed to flare up randomly, went to the doc who told me "its a throat infection" and gave me antibiotics, now i didnt believe this and got very worked up on the way home and swore I would go to another doc tomorrow to have it checked again..meanwhile i was googling my symptoms everyday and had myself convinced that I had overactive thyroid, stroke, heart issues, cancer, brain tumor, everyday i suspected something new and it seemed everyday my symptoms got worse and worse. it got to the point that The doc oredered blood tests, i had these done one morning and then headed into work only to find I was getting so worked up on the bus, i couldn breathe, my jaw was tight, my neck and shoulders ached, i got into work and turned to Dr. Google, who convinced me i had(of all things!) Tetanus.. i freaked and left work straight away and went to the hospital.. on arrival my hear rate was high, my pulse was racing and my breathing was terrible, they took me through to A bed and kept monitioring me on the ECG, my heart rate lowered but i still felt horrible and was beggininng to get a popping tingling sensation in my legs..the doc came through and ask me a myriad of questions and dedicded she would call the lab and get my blood test results, which all seemed to be clear, so she took a test for Clots and PE and this was also negative, she then decided a chest xray would be the best idea, so she did this and AGAIn it was all fine. By this time, i had calmed down and the majority of my symptoms had gone away. The doc then checked my breats and glands all fo which were fine..she talked with me about the possiblity of it being Anxiety related and we talked for a good 20 minutes about everything and she was convinced. I had GAD and possibly Depression..I have been to see another doctor who has suggested i try Hypno, which im really looking forward to and hoping it helps me...Although, i know its natural to still be concerned, i have three primary concerns that I thought someone may be able to shed some light on..here goes..
1. I have always had massive issues with sleeping, never could get to sleep, mind was very active at night, possibly more so then during the day. had Temazepam prescribed a cupla months before dads Heart attack and took it a few times, and then it all seemd to calm down and i could sleep relatively easily...ever since ive had these stupid symtpoms and started stressing about them, I fall asleep as soon as i get into bed..WHY?!?!?! Its starting to stress me out even more and i know try n force myself to stay awake cause I fear i may be "passing out" and not falling asleep! is this normal, to have these sudden changes in sleeping habits? could it be because my mind is so active during the day insetad of at night??Could this mean i have depression as well as anxiety, or chronic fatiigue or somethibng?? really this is my primary reason for thinking it could be something more!
2. Brain Tumor..i know, i know..completley irrational but can i request a CT scan to purt my mind at ease??
3. Im not on any meds but think mayeb this would help?? My doc doesnt want to put me on meds but i think i should try them..
any comments or help would be SO appreciated...i feel like im goping nuts and this site is the only thing ive seen that helps alleviate my fears..
looking forward to hearing what you all think..
Melody :)
well first of all, I am so glad that I found this forum and already feel i can "breathe easier" after reading that other people have these same issues that are plaguing my eveyday life. So heres my story so far..its quite long but i guess, id like to vent!
I am a 21 year old female..As a kid I was always very hyper, at 7 i suffered with menigicocal Septicimia and only survived it by the skin of my teeth, ever since then I had recurring issues with getting to sleeping, fear of death and general hyperactivity etc. Psychs all put it down to a a fear of death due to my illness as a younger child. NOW these symptoms all seemed to go away in thje past 5-10 years, Possibly because I started smoking Marijuana and as my new doctor said this was "self medicating" In feb my dad had a heart attack at his 50th birthday party, i lost my job and eveyrthing got very stressful. I started smoking more and also used rec. drugs a few times over the past few months (cocaine & Meth) I have always been against these "hard" drugs asd ive seen what they can do to people, firsthand.
Recentley after my dads heart attack, I started getting very breathless, I am asthmatic so at first I simply put it down to that and took ventolin, but one night I got so worked up I started shaking, crying etc, ect and ended up getting my partner to rush my to the ED. They assumed Astham and gave me a mask, the whole time I thought "this isnt working, this isnt working..it feels like its making me MUCH worse" and i told the nurse that, she then told me that "my oxygen saturation was at 100% so it WAS working" and they then discharged me without even testing for anything more serious. negligent to say the least. ANYWAY after this I began to start haing difficulty swallowing and it seemed to flare up randomly, went to the doc who told me "its a throat infection" and gave me antibiotics, now i didnt believe this and got very worked up on the way home and swore I would go to another doc tomorrow to have it checked again..meanwhile i was googling my symptoms everyday and had myself convinced that I had overactive thyroid, stroke, heart issues, cancer, brain tumor, everyday i suspected something new and it seemed everyday my symptoms got worse and worse. it got to the point that The doc oredered blood tests, i had these done one morning and then headed into work only to find I was getting so worked up on the bus, i couldn breathe, my jaw was tight, my neck and shoulders ached, i got into work and turned to Dr. Google, who convinced me i had(of all things!) Tetanus.. i freaked and left work straight away and went to the hospital.. on arrival my hear rate was high, my pulse was racing and my breathing was terrible, they took me through to A bed and kept monitioring me on the ECG, my heart rate lowered but i still felt horrible and was beggininng to get a popping tingling sensation in my legs..the doc came through and ask me a myriad of questions and dedicded she would call the lab and get my blood test results, which all seemed to be clear, so she took a test for Clots and PE and this was also negative, she then decided a chest xray would be the best idea, so she did this and AGAIn it was all fine. By this time, i had calmed down and the majority of my symptoms had gone away. The doc then checked my breats and glands all fo which were fine..she talked with me about the possiblity of it being Anxiety related and we talked for a good 20 minutes about everything and she was convinced. I had GAD and possibly Depression..I have been to see another doctor who has suggested i try Hypno, which im really looking forward to and hoping it helps me...Although, i know its natural to still be concerned, i have three primary concerns that I thought someone may be able to shed some light on..here goes..
1. I have always had massive issues with sleeping, never could get to sleep, mind was very active at night, possibly more so then during the day. had Temazepam prescribed a cupla months before dads Heart attack and took it a few times, and then it all seemd to calm down and i could sleep relatively easily...ever since ive had these stupid symtpoms and started stressing about them, I fall asleep as soon as i get into bed..WHY?!?!?! Its starting to stress me out even more and i know try n force myself to stay awake cause I fear i may be "passing out" and not falling asleep! is this normal, to have these sudden changes in sleeping habits? could it be because my mind is so active during the day insetad of at night??Could this mean i have depression as well as anxiety, or chronic fatiigue or somethibng?? really this is my primary reason for thinking it could be something more!
2. Brain Tumor..i know, i know..completley irrational but can i request a CT scan to purt my mind at ease??
3. Im not on any meds but think mayeb this would help?? My doc doesnt want to put me on meds but i think i should try them..
any comments or help would be SO appreciated...i feel like im goping nuts and this site is the only thing ive seen that helps alleviate my fears..
looking forward to hearing what you all think..
Melody :)