Not Sure How to Explain This

[Crispy Cornflake]

I apologise in advance if anyone thinks I'm just posting a load of waffle, but tonight I am feeling worse than I have done in the last two months. I feel so drained and low that I feel I am about to burst into tears. I have this terrible feeling of nausea, my head feels "too heavy" and I am really tired, but feel too scared to go to bed. I am convinced that I have something seriously wrong with me. I went to the doctors last week and my GP is sending me for blood tests (thyroid function etc) and also to a lung function specialist as sometimes I feel as if I can't catch my breath. My GP did say that I should really take more exercise and that he didn't suspect there to be anything wrong with me, but is sending me for the tests anyway to rule out any physical illness. I don't like to go to bed as when I close my eyes, I imagine all sorts of awfull things in my head which means I am unable to sleep even though right now I feel extremely tired. I am 37, but feel as if I'm 97. I feel so washed out. My GP has said that I'm suffering from anxiety, but all the symptoms feel so physical and "real" to me. He prescribed 20mg of citalopram daily, but to be honest, I'm a bit wary of taking them as there seem to be a lot of side effects. I have convinced myself that I am going to have a heart attack due to lack of sleep. GP said the medication would reduce the feelings of anxiety and therefore help me go to sleep, but I'm not sure. I feel like I'm going mad to be honest as I don't feel real and feel a bit light headed and spaced out at times. I also think that my GP must think there is something wrong with me or he wouldn't be sending me for these tests. After all, it costs money to send me for tests so I keep thinking he wouldn't just do it willy-nilly. I have been like this for the best part of 4 months, and frankly, it's really starting to get me down. I don't like to keep going back and forward to the doctors in case he thinks I'm a hypochondriac (sp). I'm soory that this is so long winded, but just typing it out seems to help a bit. Everyone on this forum has been so kind and helpful, I feel things would seem a whole lot worse without you folks. I don't suppose there is anyone up at this ungodly hour, but I'm sure someone will reply when they get a chance.

Thanks a lot & take care everyone.

[rick]

Hi, flakey!!!:)

Its still relativerly early over on this side of the big lake...

Take a deep tummy feeling breath, and lets see what's going on. First, do you think you might have caugt a bug of some sort. This will definitly throw things out of kilter! Your body has to decide what to defend, and, since it isn't sure what its defensing against, it gives the old panic signal. The flu bug is terrible here in the states, and I caught it last week. Result? The first and worst panic attacks i have had in 15 years!!!

So, that's an idea. May not make you feel better - but, may be an aswer, which can sometimes calm ones fears and palpitations.

Practically all of us have had every medical test known to man doen to us, with usually clean results. We do that, and that is a symptom of this little problem we appear to have. The least little thing will tell us we;re having a heart attack or stroke, or gout (GOUT?!?!)

You get the picture. Remind yourself, you're still healthy, still breathing, and so far, nothings happening except youre becoming more scared by the minute. Pause here, and ask yourself. If I'm breathing walking, talking, and reading Ricks message on the pc, then I havent reached basket case level QUITE yet - and, you won't.

Remember, all of us here have been thru this, some as recently as today, and we're all still here and not up at the local nut ward (Category A unit, its called over here - Little cultural enlightmenment on the side!:)

For the meds - you must answer that, as we're all just folks on keyboards and can't tell you what to do. But, we CAN offer suggsetions and options. First, the feelings you get from the meds - do you think perhaps its working, but the feeling is so strange to be made to feel "Normal", that your body is trying like hell to fight it off, because it sees it as an "alien - (sorry, just watched a sci fi on the tube ) doing weird things to you when its not?

As for your GP giving you all these tests... They ALL do that, hon, - expecially if you have a good pay record or insurance or whatever. They'll run toenail fungus test to see of there is any correlation with chest pains, if you let them go on long enough. They're like that. So, I wouldn't worry about it, one, becaue more n likely, they're not finding a thing, which is good - and two, If they did find some strange malady, what could be done about it tonite?

Browse through the different forums on this site, I'm sure you'll come across calming exercises, breathing techniques, and other cool things to help. Force yourself to play a game on the pc, play solitaire if you have a deck, scrub the kitchen floor - activity will help anxiety.

Take care, and hang in there.

Hope I made some sense.

Love, Rick

[bananarbabe]

Hi Crispy,

I went through the same things you were going through just a couple of weeks ago. My doctor also had a couple of blood tests done on me and I kept thinking that something was gonna show up on the blood tests. I too had the sleepless nights as well. MD's always have those tests done just to make sure everything is alright with you.

I was having trouble sleeping because my heart would feel like its skipping a beat. Try to distract yourself by reading a book or playing some soothing music. Also, a warm glass of milk has been good with helping me calm down.

About your loss of sleep, you won't have a heart attack from loss of sleep. Everyone loses sleep some time in their lives, think about how you still manage to function the next day without having a heart attack.

Hope this helps!

Chris

[Meg]

Dear Crispy,

You're not going mad, you're not having a heart attack( you don't have them due to lack of sleep )


'I imagine all sorts of awfull things in my head' This is the root of how you are feeling tonight .. Your imagination
As Rick says our GP's have a duty of care and that translates into sending you for a battery of tests to exclude anything else to reassure them as well as you. Then if they are all clear you will need to accept this is anxiety and start helping yourself.

I hope you did have a good cry it's very helpful and releases lots of tension ..


'I feel like I'm going mad to be honest' The disease processes are completely different and when someone is going mad they don't feel scared about it - there behaviour feels right to them so no worries there. If you're concerned and anxious about it it's not nature taking it's course.

The tests a newly anxious person should have are an ECG and basic blood tests to check electrolyes and haematology which will include thyroid function tests..

My guess is that your breathing is currently too fast and not deep enough which leads to a run of symptoms that you're describing. Check Bryans post on yogic breathing or of thats too hard at presnt just breathe in deeply and then out for longer or breathe in - hold , breathe out hold...
Only you can decide about the meds. They can take up to 4 weeks to setle onto and you may feel worse initially and one day you'll need to come off them and that can have difficulties too. Inbetween they can help enormously.

My overall suggestion to you is that in absence of any other illness please treat and care for yourself as if it if anxiety by following the suggestions on this board and the home page has loads of catagories with help on it.

Keep in touch.




Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

[pauline]

Dear crispy

I feel i should reply to you as you are sufering so badly at the moment. I have been where you are and so have all the poeple that have replied to you thats anxiety for you. Its good that the doctor is sending you for tests as this will put your mind at rest and for you to know that nothing is wrong and it REALLY is anxiety causeing you so much stress. It amazing what anxiety can do and very hard to accept that it could be causeing you so many syptoms but believe me it does. I myself have just started taking Citalopram and believe me i hate the thought of meds as i have been suffering with anxiety for many years. I am so much better now but still stuggle with going away from the house. So i'm going to take tabs and hope that they will help what have i to lose a few side-effects but hopefully a better quality of life. I was given 10mg but for the first week have cut up to 5mg and so far their have been no side-effects. Perhaps you could see if you could take 10mg and build up to the 20mg. Read all you can on anxiety just by reading these boards you will see that you are not alone most of us are just like you and we do not have some terrible illness we just have anxiety which we can and have learn't to cope with. Dr Claire weekes has wrote some good books which explain all the syptoms of anxiety and the reason's why you feel the way you do. You have only been sufering for a short time do all you can to get over the anxiety do not let it get a hold on you as then its harder to change your thinking patterns, which at the end of the day is what anxiety is, you frighting yourself with your thoughts.

take care
Pauline

pjpriest

[Lottie32]

Hi Crispy

I have spent most of Christmas feeling very much like you are doing.

It has been very annoying, and inconvenient, as I haven't managed to get half the things done that I wanted to, and I felt so nauseous that I found it hard to lie down and just "chill out" (hope that doesn't sound too mad!)

Unfortunately the gym was closed for most of Xmas too, and it was cold and wet and miserable, so probably didn't get enough exercise either.

To top it all I was really really depressed, and everybody in the entire world seemed to be having a happy pink glittery time.

The only way that I got through was to realise that I was suffering from anxiety, which was peaking due to Xmas, and the financial, and social stress that this brings. Also it was the first Xmas without Fossil (my granny).

I know it seems really hard to do (incidentally I had fibromyalgia, thyroid, and diabeties over Xmas), but the sooner you accept that Anxiety can cause these really truly terrible physical symptoms, that you can learn to deal with it and start to feel better.

Good luck for 2004. Hope you are feeling much better now



Charlie

[paul]

hello all,crispy cornflake i used to think i had other things wrong with me as well.i couldnt just put it down to anxiety.id explained to my doctor my symptoms etc,he said it was anxiety related.i think i had a few tests(i cant remember when)but it seemed ok.i think the other members have offered you great advice and support,so i wont need to add more.sometimes i stay awake till rather late so what out for other late entries in the forum[^].all the best paul

[uryjm]

Crispy
Hope you're feeling better, I'm sure you got through the night although you may feel exhausted and drained today. I've found fatigue makes me vulnerable to anxiety and can depress my spirits too, so you do get into a bit of a vicious cirlce with this damn thing. But it is probably just anxiety, and you will find your own way through it in time. And i'd just like to add to all the reassurance above - you won't go mad, crack up, break down, fade away or any of the things you feel like you might be about to do. It's the worrying about going over the edge that's the problem, but it's not going to happen to you.

Jim

[Hears The Water]

Crispy, When I am feeling like that I check to make sure a couple of things are ok. First I make sure I am breathing correctly. I have a tendancy to hyperventaliat (aka overbreathing) and that will make me all light headed and freaked out. I sit or lay down and check to make sure I am taking a full lungfull of air. (upper, middle and lower lungs, I visualize it)Then I do a little exercise I found. Take a deep breath on a count of three second, release the breath for three seconds while saying the word "relax". I do this ten times. At the end of the tenth time I hold my breath for a count of 5. This slows my breathing down to the correct rate of ten breaths per minute. I usually do not have to do this more than once, but it is totally normal to have to do it a couple of times if the blood oxygen is realy out of kilter.
The next thing I check is to see if I am drinking enough water. When I feel tired and drained I will drink three or four glasses of water. Usually by the time I need to go to the bathroom I am feeling better.
Then I check to make sure I have eaten within the last four hours. Something with a good protein and a carb. I have tried to go no carb, but it makes me feel yucky. I need the protein to keep the blood sugar up.
I can empathize with you on the being scared to sleep. Those thoughts can be very scary and can run thru your head. And to make matters worse, the more sleep deprived you are, the harder it is to deal with the scary thoughts. Have you tried to take even little cat naps? Sometimes even a half an hour helps me to think more clearly. Plus then you might be able to "build" on your past success. I hope that this helps.
God Bless you and yours
Hears The Water

[Crispy Cornflake]

Thankyou for all your replies. There is some really good and reassuring advice there. Obviously, I got through Saturday night, but was very tired on sunday. Had an early night Sunday, but had an awful night. Kept waking up feeling really panicky. I managed to start some exercise yesterday. I went cycling for about an hour and 15 minutes and it felt really good. I have to go to the hospital today though for a second ECG and some blood tests. I have started taking a vit B complex, and will be cutting right back on the alcohol. Although I have been prescribed medication, I want to try and get through this without the use of drugs. Incidently, is it ok to take a multi vit with iron as well as the vit B complex? I feel really drained and tired today though and while I don't have pains as such, my chest feels really "raw" inside. I don't know what that's about. I just want to thank everyone. I'm so pleased I've discovered this forum.

[Meg]

Hi Crispy,


Yes , it's fine to combine Vit B with your multi vit . Just check how much the multi vit has in it of the B's, it's usually fairly piddling amounts though.

Don't go above 100mg day of B's.

Good for you in the bike ride and alcohol choice...keep it going . Noone suggesting you need to abstain comepletely just really moderate it for a while.


Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

[stimpy]

Hi Crispy,

I hope you are feeling better.
Well done for making it through Saturday night, (hard and horrible though it was,) you did it. And well done on the bike ride too.

Love & Best wishes

Liz xxx