War on distressing thoughts: let's beat them once and for all

[NoPoet]

Hi all,

I have suffered many problems during the last 3 months and I feel that in the last month I have started to fight back. I have noticed that I tend to have "major" issues which act like roadblocks and it takes several weeks of hard work and soul searching to get through them.

I then feel a week or a few days of relief before another one of my issues steps to the fore and becomes my main enemy.

I do feel that I am making progress and I believe that I have come a long way in 3 months.

I am going to write a thread about my own experiences with distressing thoughts. This is gonna be painful but what the hell, we're human beings, we live in a world of pain and the only way we are ever going to change that is by facing it and fighting back.

Please use this thread to talk about your own experiences with distressing thoughts. Anything and everything. Share it with us, and we will talk you through them. This is another step in our journey of recovery. It's long and painful, so let's make the journey together.

[Lainie]

"I am going to write a thread about my own experiences with distressing thoughts. This is gonna be painful but what the hell, we're human beings, we live in a world of pain and the only way we are ever going to change that is by facing it and fighting back."

Your words have encouraged me to do the same.

[june]

The instant panic attack - first thought I am dying / then the adrenalin / the fear.
I have told every one who will listen (Docs, Councellors CBT etc) that I DO NOT FEEL STRESSED until the panic strikes ===== THEN i feel stressed.
""Oh but you must have been worrying about something to cause your panic attack"""
:mad: :mad: They always seem to know how I fee
l:mad: what I actually feel does not seem to count.
I have read lots about the symptoms and i can tell anyone that you have to control your breathing during a PA - BUT can I do it??????? NO.
Can I change my thoughts??? NO
Have you actually tried???? What a stupid question:mad:
Best wishes
June

[NoPoet]

Agreed, it is very easy for people to tell us what we need to do but it is difficult to know where to start. It's like the old NHS stop smoking adverts - "Don't TELL me; tell me HOW!"

I don't find that controlled breathing helps prevent a panic attack, although it does make me feel better. I find that realising I'm having a panic attack makes them stop very quickly. I am good at spotting the signs.

When I first became anxious and stressed I felt that there must have been specific reasons. Now, three months later, I feel like I am being anxious for anxiety's sake. The reasons don't seem to matter any more, I've been like this for so long that it is sustaining itself, which is why I am finding it difficult to stop my negative thoughts.

[Mudskipper]

Often my thoughts aren't just distressing, they're downright terrifying, and when they hit I find myself spiralling suddenly downwards in a kind of mental whirlpool. A couple of times I've literally passed out through sheer terror. I've suffered from anxiety and depression for twenty years or so on and off, sometimes there's no obvious cause but more often it's specific to some incident or something I've read. The worst I can remember was around seven years ago after watching a television documentary about the supervolcano underneath Yellowstone Park in America. The programme outlined the frightening consequences of a future eruption and that was enough to set me off. I was consumed with thoughts of collapsing civilization, panic, war, famine, you name it; coupled with this was the fact that I'd only recently become a father for the first time. What about my kid? What if the best I can do for him is to put him out of his misery? What if I end up burying my own child? Well it went on and on for ages until I made myself so thoroughly ill and depressed that I was off work for a month.

That's how bad it gets with me. I've had similar but less serious episodes since for one reason and another, but I've yet to find any real coping mechanism other than medication.

Fun isn't it?:shrug:

[june]

Mudskipper
I can relate to your feelings - i also watched that programme it was fantastically interesting BUT devastatingly scary.
Reading your fear of the future - I am old enough to remember the threat of nuclear war - maybe you heard of us being warned that if the siren went - we had 4 minutes to get into a cubihole under the stairs with our radios food and all other supplies.:blush:
This was terrifying I have three children and a hubby - how were we all going to fit in that cubihole??????
Oh the stupidity of it when we look back.:mad:
BUT BUT so many young couples were so afraid of the future they decided NOT to have children - now in there later years they are devastated that they BELIEVED the horror stories and bitterly regretting their loss of the enjoyment of a family they never had.
MY ADVICE TO YOU IS ENJOY YOUR LIFE - WE COULD HAVE MISSED OUT ON 40 YEARS OF THE PLEASURE OF OUR GROWING FAMILY.
i KNOW THE PANIC THE ANXIETY BUT PLEASE TRY TO BE CALM AND HAVE FUN. Don't listen to the scaremongering.
Best wishes
June
:hugs:

[Mudskipper]

June
Thanks for your reply and concern. You're right, it does seem as if there's always been something to worry about. I'm old enough to remember a booklet called Protect and Survive being on sale in WH Smiths, offering advice on coping with a nuclear attack. It's scary to think we were considered close enough to the brink for the government to make something like that available. Likewise, there was a programme last week about the development of the V-bombers in the 1950's which spoke about the Cuban missile crisis. The bombers were sat at the end of the runway, loaded up and ready to go, the crews had to stay together 24/7, except to go to the toilet, and they were told once they'd dropped their bombs not to try to come back. They wouldn't have enough fuel and anyway there'd be nothing left to come back to. Scary stuff, as my mother confirmed when I was talking to her about it at the weekend.
Worrying about this stuff has become a way of life for me and I'm in serious danger of missing out on enjoying my kids childhood or, worse still, spoiling it for them. Still, I try to give them times to remember. Dorset Steam Fair at the end of the month, which they always enjoy and I'll try to blot it all out for a few days.

Take care yourself.:flowers:

[june]

:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
I try to remember that the most scary stories sell more newspapers:ohmy:
Best wishes
Have fun:yesyes:
June
:hugs:

[JTemperance]

The worst I can remember was around seven years ago after watching a television documentary about the supervolcano underneath Yellowstone Park in America. The programme outlined the frightening consequences of a future eruption and that was enough to set me off.

The disaster programs on TV make me completely lose it too. I remember being a kid in school and they had us watch a program about mudslides, everyone was laughing at the houses being destroyed, but I was having a total panic attack and had to leave the room.

[NoPoet]

I'm going to analyse these statistics later this week when I get some free time and see if there is anything we can learn about the "big picture" of anxiety, depression and distressing thoughts suffered by NMP members. I'm working on a "recovery diary" and these statistics could be very useful. Or they may not. ;)

[meg86]

I hate distressing thoughts!!! mine are also terrifying, everything is bad news on the tv in the paper on the internet theres no escape!! everyone wants to scare the crap out of us and unfortunately for people with anxiety it works very well!! :(

i have been a crying shaking mess today because of one of many disasters thats supposed to happen in the future, its always something going to get us im sick of it :( x

[trojax1]

Dont know bout you lot but I get scenarios going on in my head a lot of the time. Stupid pointless ones where its usually me doing something stupid or embarassing and gets me feeling really anxious. They usually just happen and I let them happen but lately I've been stopping my self thinking about them which is really helping me to stop feeling anxious.