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christine
03-09-05, 18:51
Hi this is my first post. I have just bought a new car, haven't driven for approx nine months. Sometimes I enjoy driving but other times I almost seem to lose my nerve as i'm driving along. and its almost like i can't wait to get home. As I pull up I feel like i've just done my driving test lol.
and failed [8)] even though more than likely my driving hasn't been bad at all, suppose it could be the way i'm feeling inside. Does anyone else ever feel like this? Thanks Christine

alexis
03-09-05, 19:38
Hi Christine, welcome to the site, there will be quite a few people along soon to answer this, it isnt an area I have a problem with so cannot offer advice, Ive never driven to places I dont know since I got lost the day after I passed my test ,but love driving locally, welcome again, love Alexis,xx

henri
03-09-05, 20:09
hi christine,
congratulations on the new car, what type is it?
driving is a pet phobia of mine. i passed my test yesterday (yippee!) but it was my fifth one in ten years. i have had a million lessons, as well as CBT sessions focusing specifically on driving!
for me, it's all about my mental approach. whenever i've forced myself to think confidently and positively, i've found it easier to get into the car and drive.
having said that, i've not yet driven alone in a car so who am i to say!
henri

Meg
03-09-05, 20:28
Henri - Congratulations !!!

Well done You !

Christine

Confidence and experience and practice all help

Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

christine
04-09-05, 10:34
Thanks for your messages. hopefully once I get back into driving again I will be able to just get in my car without having to plan my journey down to the last detail. Its a nice easy fiesta to drive & i'm very pleased with it. Thanks again Christine

florence
04-09-05, 12:30
Hi Christine

Welcome to the forum..
I can relate totally to what you're going thru, I have driving phobia myself, I havent drove for at least a couple of years. But I drove twice last week, trying to sort it out. I dont want to be housebound all the time, so something has to be done. :)
Just like you, I dont think there's anything wrong with my driving skills, just the way I feel within myself is unbearable. I had my first panic attack 10 years ago in a car on the motorway, i think that's where the link is.
Anyway, I hope it will get better for you.


Hi Henri
Well done for passing your test.:)

Florence.

*He who loses money, loses much; He who loses a friend, loses much more, He who loses faith, loses all.*

seh1980
04-09-05, 14:30
hi Christine,

I hate driving on motorways and do everything I can to avoid it. I'm ok driving around town though I started driving again about 8 months ago after not driving for 2 years. Try starting just by driving around the block and slowly venture further. Always have music with you that you can sing slong to and rescue remedy..

Sarah :D

"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal

pips
04-09-05, 21:09
Hi Christine,

I have a huge phobia and can't drive at all.

I have had about 40 lessons in the past and that was before all the panic stuff! It just scares the pants of me.

So i think you do really well to drive in the first place so WELL DONE you!

Take care,

Love PIP'S X X

christine
11-09-05, 15:00
Hi Thanks for your replies :D I find the less I think about it the better I do. I think !! I'm ok with places I know but would like to not panic when I see there is a route diversion. Has anybody actually got over driving phobia? I would find that reassuring. Thanks Christine.

Meg
12-09-05, 18:34
Yes, this can be overcome.

You're absolutely right **I find the less I think about it the better I do**

It has much to do with what you are thinking



Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

mum2four
23-09-05, 15:20
I have dirving anxiety's I got my lerner's about 7 years ago and did 2 lesson then gave up and used the excuse that I had no money. I still cant convince my self to waste money on a driver licence what if i give up again i hate wasting money and alway's find better thing to use my money for instead of speanding it on my liecence. Think get worse when there's an expection from people to sit my liecnece again. I know where ther fear come's from and I have come a long way since i was a kids. Back then I would only sit in the back pasanger seat and anyone refused to let sit me I would have a hissy fit and go right off even bitting or kicking ect. Up untill i was 22 i still having major front seat pasanger issue's and if any one sugested that i even sit in the driver seat I would have a panic attack and just shut down or scream at the person and run off. I still have panic momement's while in the front seat and i have to have my seat as far back as I can I worry that if the car stop's i will hit my head on the dash or something. At night my fear is that someone will open my door so i lock it with out alerting anyone in anyway that I looked it and if someone hear me look it i pretend it was accident. There are other things that bother me about car but that are my big anxiety's.

I also tend to get flash images of ways the car could crash that really bothers me a increases the anxiety.

No one I know understands my fear I supose I cant blame them I dont understand it cause I know logicly I'm over reacting. For the most part I can control the feelings with loud music but if the driver or some one els ask's me to turn it down or I know i cant turn it up then I the anxiety will evently become to much it got so bad a fue time's that I felt like jumping out of a moving car.

strawberrie
24-09-05, 17:28
hi christine, i know exactly what you mean cos i used to be terrified of driving, but i have overcome this fear now so it definitely can be done.

The only way i believe you can overcome it is to drive as much as you can. I know this sounds very scary (I used to dread even short trips, feeling sick and worrying about them for days beforehand) but honestly the more you do it, the more the fear subsides.

One tip I heard is that lots of people fail to overcome their driving phobia because they practice on journeys that are too short. If you only go on short trips and stop as soon as you reach the peak of your anxiety you will then associate stopping the drive with stopping the anxiety, so you need to keep driving until the anxiety subsides.

Personally I would recommend going for quite long drives but around areas that are very familiar to you so you do not have the added pressure of finding your way. You may also feel more comfortable taking a sympathetic passenger with you.

You said that you haven't driven for 9 months, well I think most people would feel nervous after a long time without driving, so take it slowly, and keep it as familiar as you can until you feel you can move onto more difficult routes.

I can remember being petrified the first time I drove into my local town, now I do it without giving it a second thought so honestly the more you do it, the easier it gets. That said, don't EVER try and get me to do a parallel park lol! ;)

Take care,
mag xx

loopy lou
07-10-05, 13:07
Hi Christine,
I am, unfortunately, exactly the same as you have described yourself to be whilst driving. It is getting me down and I feel so isolated. I can just never get to feel comfortable whilst driving, no matter what. I feel like crying sometimes when I see all the other women driving anywhere without a care in the world. I seem to have this invisible comfort zone around my local area and will not go out of it at all! It is interferring with my kids social life coz they have to wait for their dad to get home from work to fetch and carry them. I make all kinds of excuses not to have to drive the car. Ive got a beautiful Audi car thats got all the mod cons but still hate driving.....I would never entertain going on a motorway at all and feel that if I could get over this phobia my life but be alot better. I would feel so proud of myself if I could just get to grips with this. I feel exactly as you described about getting home on the drive and feeling a sense of relief. What can we do to get outta this rut!
Lou

Gemma
10-11-05, 14:00
Hi Christine & Loopy Lou, I know exactly how you both feel. I thought I was the only person who felt like this until I found this forum, kind of makes me feel better already to know I'm not the only one!

I know that you can get better as i have improved loads over the past year and sometimes actually enjoy driving now (only if it's locally, during the day, in good weather and I know exactly where I'm going though!). My advice is to try and go out on 'safe' journeys during the day when the traffic is light and you have plenty of time to just drive around. Put on your favourite cd and just keep driving around areas that you know well trying to think about the music or things that make you happy, anything to take your mind of the driving really. Take deep breaths and just drive slower if you start to feel panicky, but do try to keep on driving through the panic. This is what I did and I can now drive locally with virtually no anxiety.

I just can't seem to work up the courage to drive on a motorway though and am too embarrassed to admit to anyone why, I just make up excuses not to. One of my best friends and also my brother have both recently moved to houses that can only be reached by driving on the motorway, so I have avoided visiting either of them unless my boyfriend is driving. It's really getting me down as I want to be able to go and visit them on my own, but get so anxious about driving there I can't seem to do it. I know I should take my own advice and just do it, but I can't seem to make the first step.

I've been on a few sites today that recommend hypnotherapy, but it's quite expensive and all the places seem to be in London (I'm in Manchester). Anyone know of any other cures?
Gemma

desperate
10-11-05, 16:41
I had a thread on this same subject, although i passed fine, just normal nerves, i developed anxiety whilst at uni without a car.

I have a refresher lesson next friday and am just going to be honest with him and say what i feel like, I'm not sure if he'll think i'm safe on the road or not.....we'll see.

Sarah

Basil
18-09-06, 11:32
Hi Meg, I have aready posted at "Driving" but I saw your posts here too. I have been a driver for 23 years and then I had two major panics in the car in the middle of the summer! Once when I was driving, the other when hubby was driving. I have not been able to drive, ever since. I have only just got in the car, as a passenger, with my mate the other week, and I was ok but we only went two miles. When I had the panic with my husband, we were 25 miles away. I was really really shocked and had to deal with panics in the house for several weeks as a result. But how on earth do I get over this? I am able to walk for short distances, even go to a near by shop and I was at a school meeting the other day, despite minir feelings of unreality. The school is 5 minutes walk away. So I can get out a bit. I even walked a mile on Friday and walked out of the house for the first time on Friday without thinking about it first. But I am nervous of transport or I am nervous of having an attack whilst in a car/bus etc. When I was driving and had the attack, the feeling of unreality was overwhelming. I had to pull up on a double yellow suddenly or I hate to think what would have happened.

So, apart from getting out and about locally, walking, I am house bound. Oh, my mate might call during the week and suggest taking me in the car again. But other than this, I am house bound and alone with my thoughts. This is equivalent to throwing petrol on the fire instead of water isnt it? How do I stop this negative thinking and being afraid? Or, what can I do at home to get my mind away from the anxiety completely? My husband is worried sick though he tries not to show it and I feel awful not being able to go anywhere with them or take them out and about.

Please can you help?

Best Wishes

Shirley

How on earth do I get over this.

Nathan1
06-09-08, 12:33
Hi...

To over come driving phobia,anxiety thought field therapy(taps therapy) is the best method. It provides driving test help (http://www.tapstherapy.co.uk/drivingtest.html) also........

Nathan1
06-09-08, 12:38
Hi...

To over come driving phobia,anxiety thought field therapy(taps therapy) is the best method. It provides driving test help (http://www.tapstherapy.co.uk/drivingtest.html) also........

Nathan1
06-09-08, 12:43
To over come driving phobia. i hope that tapstherapy might helpful to you. It in not only in case of drivng and also in case of driving test help (http://www.tapstherapy.co.uk/drivingtest.html)...:)

oldgolded
29-09-08, 15:07
I suffer with this one, and have found that the only solution is to drive. I am OK on single track roads, but have trouble with dual carriageways and motorways. I am sure it is due to feeling trapped on these kind of roads. I am now tackling this problem again by choosing a stretch of dual carriageway nearby and just driving along it backwards and forwards. The first time can be tough, but the secret is to stick with it and just keep going backwards and forwards. It definitely gets easier the more you do it, and eventually gets boring which is a good sign. The stretch of road I am using at the moment is about 6 miles one way and 6 miles back. It is time consuming and obviously costly in terms of petrol, but that is the price one has to pay to overcome this thing. I am shortly planning to progress to a different more difficult stretch. I find you have to keep practicing. If you stop and leave it for a while, the longer you leave it, the harder it is to get started again. It is definitely worthwhile in terms of a sense of achievment and an increase in confidence, and the goal is to think about all the places that you will be able to drive to once you have cracked it completely.

worriedsick2009
27-04-09, 18:13
ok this is going to sound strange but I feel like many of my phobias started in the car.

I am 26 and have been driving for 9 years approx. I drove one of my cars roguhly 110,000 miles, another car roughly 20k yet another for 20k and my newer car for 25k. Total i'm closing in on 200k miles.

let me start by saying I love cars. I love to drive, and I love to drive fast. As a teenager, I was always modding my cars, wheels/tires/exhaust etc and taking them to the limit. Looking back i realize how stupid all of that was but never did I have a second of fear while i was driving regardless of how fast I was going or what I was doing.

My fear struck me while driving on I95 to florida. It was late at night a few years ago and i was driving with my family. they were all asleep and it was my turn. (I NEVER told them any of my fears because i felt that they would have been contagious - if this idea ever crosses someone's mind i am worried that it would infect them too).
The fear I was feeling was - I was going anywhere between 70 and 80mph. the limit was 70 or 75 no matter, i was keeping up with traffic and i wasn't doing anything excessive. It was a long road, subtle turns etc not much really to do other than activate cruise control and hang onto the wheel. While cruisin along like this the feelings hit me. What was connecting me to the road? My hands, such small things, modulated by my mind. How much would i have to turn my hands to make the wheel turn? One small slip, a jerk, would send me and my entire family tumbling to our death. How had I avoided making mistakes like this in the past? had my time finally come? ive driven so far and not died, how could i possibly make it any farther? well you get the drift at this point (no pun intended). But I had to stop. I felt like I couldn't have my family's life in danger by me being at the helm - even though they all trusted me as the best driver up until that point. I never told them why i had to stop - I just said I was tired.
The feelings didn't really happen again after that for a while. Driving around town in familiar environments I was ok. Now driving my newer car, however, I find myself having some of the same thoughts. I was driving my car the other day with my brother. I kept feeling little twinges in my hands. Thinking oh crap im going to have a seizure - what if i have brain cancer and have a seizure, what if this is it - i CANT kill my brother i would never forgive myself. I didn't care about my own safety but i felt like i had to have someone else drive the car I was afraid i was going to lose control at any moment. I pulled over and put him in charge - he was worried i had never done this before. The same guy he had seen completing slalom courses at race-tracks and drag strips was reduced to a pile of mush. I said i felt like i was going to puke and didnt want to lose control if i did. He accepted that even though it was because i had this fear that i was going to black out with a seizure.


the fears are the worst when drivign at a moderate pace on a long road.

Bluebelle
28-04-09, 03:01
My goodness I can relate to this one!
I live in Canada in cottage country meaning all lakes and not so many roads. In the winter everthing freezes over and people in our community can save 20 minute off of their commute time to a closet town (where there are grocery stores etc) if they drive across the frozen lake.

Yes you are reading this correctly DRIVE ACROSS THE FROZEN LAKE.

Everyone in my community does this as it saves 20 minutes. Our town snowplows go out there and plow it into a four lane highway and everyone uses it EXCEPT ME! I can't -no way ! It's crazy out there. There are no painted lines denoting lanes. there is no speed limit , everyone is skidding out of control and there are always people on snowmobiles darting in and out of traffic. At night it is even worse-there are no street lights you can't see where you are going if the wind blows the snow you lose your path and have no idea where you are going. It is an unbelievable torture.

I could barely be in the car when we are going across. I'd have to have the window open which is stupid because if the car broke through the ice you wouldn't survive the freezing water anyway. But for some reason I'd have to have my window open and everyone hates this as it is usually minus 20 and cold air hurts ! Now I can't even be in a car if it is snowy and freezing rain is beautiful coating eveything in glass ice but I can't even look at the slick glare road.

So I quit driving and then I quit going in cars that were going across the lake then I had to quit going anywhere unless the pavement was clear of snow / ice and I had checked the weather forecast and was sure there was to be no snow.

I was like this for many years and then this spring (you know, when everything has melted and it's warm again) I started trying to drive .

I started in an empty parking lot with my sister. We did a half hour or so every night and then I did it by myself until I felt better about going out onto roads. At first we'd take short trips and now I go further and further but I never challenge myself too much - I stick with the same route and distance until I am totally calm.

I have also read about relaxation music to listen to but I haven't tried it yet.

I know there is hope in the short term but as snow as the snow flies I dunno..I probably still won't be able to get into a car on a snowy day but I'll worry about that when the time comes.

You might try sticking to parking lots until you feel more confident. Get someone to drive you there and keep you company and just drive around the parking lot. Have a friend who understands the situation and they be able to help you stay calm, and you'll have a good visit with your friend !

Lots of luck to everyone trying to drive - I am cheering for us all!
Bluebelle

Gosia
16-10-11, 12:31
Hello, I think I have developed a driving phobia. I had drove a car for about a year and a half, and had never been comfortable with that. Was always happy to finish my journey. Than I moved to another country and completely gave up driving. That was 11 years ago. Last year I decided to start driving again but the fear was so overwhelming. First of all I was terrified to drive on the other side of the street, second I would have to drive with two small children; third the change of the gears (my first car was semi automatic). The only thing I could think of was (it is ) the car accidents. But somehow I have started and drove a few times to get and pick up my children from the nursery.
Now we moved yet to another country - where the driving is to my mind much more difficult than in the UK. The drivers are very, very inpatient and drive like crazy. We have just bought a car (automatic) and I am in total panic even the thought of driving makes me very, very nervous to the state that I feel chest pain. I get very depressed about the whole situation. I want to drive, I am fed up of taking my children to school by two buses (takes ages)and carry heavy shopping from the supermarket. I am worry that during the driving I will get quite serious panic attack and cause the accident. I am worry about about other drivers that they can crash to my car. What should I do? Should I get some sort of therapy or just start driving?