please help first time on here!

[ktb1987]

hi i dont know if anyone can give me some advise im always worrying about catching diseses exspecially hiv. i dont know why i think its maybe because i was stupid at one time in my life and had to be tested for it i also went on the internet constantly looking up info on it that now looking back prob didnt help because as soon as i get a sore throat or swollen glands i automatically think ive contracted the virus some how. i am now in a very happy relationship with a baby on the way ive had all my bloods checked at 12 weeks a routine thing they do during your pregnancy everything thankfully was fine. im sooooo worried now though as i dont know if i have been at risk or not im a beauty therapist and wear gloves for most parts of waxing but i dont wear them for eyebrow waxing now im compltely freaking out as sometimes you can still get blood spotting on the eyebrows an as i havnt been waerimg gloves im so scared ive got hiv??? and ive also just come done with a flu like illness so im thinking overtime now that i have the symptons. if im not at risk how can i stop worrying?? i go on holiday mon but cant enjoy myelf because this is on my mind 24 7. also cos im pregnant im worrying ill pass it to my baby....... obviously i will wear gloves from now on. please help me some one thanks

[pollyanna]

Hi

First of all congratulations on your pregnancy :flowers:

I dont know if your anxiety of catching diseases is recent or you have had it for a while, but i think when you are about to become a parent your thoughts and feelings change. i only have one child , and he is almost 18, but i feel my anxiety went through the roof at that point in my life, i think i have a natural disposition to depression and anxiety, but this was like adding rocket fuel in the mix. at that time i didnt really have anyone to discuss things with and my anxiety just grew and grew. At that time i was a nurse, and one thing stuck with me for a while, and i was terrified of passing it on to my baby, on one ocassion when i was getting changed after a shift, i had felt some jaggy in my shoes, when i took it off it turned out to be a suture needle,( to put stiches in a wound), and some how it had embedded in my shoe, i didnt know how or when, well my mind went into overdrive, like you, i thought about it 24/7, what if it had been used on someone with hiv.... this went on for a while, also no one else seemed to be concerned at all. anyway to cut a long story short, i worried aand worried, because i was stuck in that anxiety cycle, actually the chances even if it had been used to treat somone with hiv, passing it on would have been slim, for lots of reasons, it didnt penerate my skin, once exposed to air becomes less potent etc......
The chances of you contracting hiv from the incident you are describing are extremely extremley slim, i am no expert on the subject, but i remember looking at all the information at the time that i could to try and reassure myself.
You have to try and break this cycle, stick to facts and not all the what ifs, i know how hard that is, try and focus on something else, you are going to have a new baby, you have to look after yourself and your baby and you want to enjoy your pregnancy, you are at a wonderful time in your life.
i have learned over the years that the things we worry about , no one can give us a definative answer about anything, because nothing in life is definate. concentrate on the here and now and not these thoughts, because thats all they are and who says you have to listen to them........! ( someone said this to me a few years ago and it was like a lightbulb moment)
Hope this has been some help to you, you have a wonderful time ahead of you, and you are going on holiday on monday, go and enjoy, and when these thoughts creep in, push away , focus on something else , and remember they are just thoughts........
Let us know how the holiday goes, and remember its ok to get reassurance or comfort when you need it, this site is great for that,


best wishes,

P X:hugs:

[ktb1987]

thank you so much for ur reply and reassurance. i will try my hardest to push the thoughts away and enjoy my pregnancy and holiday. its daft because the more i think about it i dont even think i had a cut or nething on my hand for the blood to get into my system and i dont even know if the blood went on my hand let alone if the client was hiv ! ahhhhhhhhh thank u again for your kind words x:)

[pollyanna]

You are welcome, if talking to someone, or saying our worries out loud or on paper helps us, then we must do it.

Thoughts can really get out of control, and it happens to us all, but you are on it, taking back some control.... well done u :yesyes:

remember to let us know about your holiday.... go enjoy..:shades:
Pauline x