malcolm furneaux
16-06-09, 19:40
Hi,
My name is Malcolm and have just retired from work aged 60. I live in SE London and am very fortunate to have a great partner of 25 years + who has always supported me with my [initial] depression problems and now anxiety with panicky type stuff. I've got a son and he and his partner have brought us a lovely grand daughter. In so many ways I feel very lucky having been born in a stable country [UK!], never had to go thro/take part in a war as did my g/father and dad & had a reasonably good upbringing apart from being sent to school too early and later a horrendous boarding school which I think has exacerbated my issues. I have been lucky always to have been in work despite my MH troubles & have retired on a good pension. I have also been able to afford a lot of therapy & had CBT sessions x 3 all of whcih have been very helpful in causing me to take a sensible 'appraisal' of myself as a person warts and all and this has substantially reduced my depressive tendencies. But the anxiety has unfort. got a lot worse ever since I had a breakdown in 2005 due to work pressures.
I feel anxious most of the time esp. in the early mornings and worry about things over which I have no control - u know the stuff - my health, my partners health, fears about loss of friends and family members and of course the grand reaper [or whateva he's called] I feel I have to spend lots of time on a daily basis doing things to manage my anxiety/panic and worry [yes!] that I don't have time enough to do straightforward enjoyable things. I feel of late that the persistent anxiety is "shutting me down" but I am having a bad patch as I write this.
To manage I take medication [A/D's] but have to say not found any of the 8 or so AD's i've taken over the years any use for anxiety but may have helped my mood. I swim every morning in my local pool [gives me good short term relief from the fluttering stomach & negative/panicky 'what if' thinking] and I've recently returned to my meditation and buddhist practise. I don't read books on anxiety any more - am fed up with them!! but do at the moment wear a rubber band on my hand which I flick when I begin 'what if' thinking. I've just been on my first holiday of 5 days with partner since my breakdown - was not too bad.
I am very grateful to have access to this site esp to those who set it up [am a 're-joined' member of several years] and admire how everyone tries to cope with their difficulties many much worse than mine. It has been of so much help as now when things are really difficult.
kind regards to all
Malcolm Furneaux
My name is Malcolm and have just retired from work aged 60. I live in SE London and am very fortunate to have a great partner of 25 years + who has always supported me with my [initial] depression problems and now anxiety with panicky type stuff. I've got a son and he and his partner have brought us a lovely grand daughter. In so many ways I feel very lucky having been born in a stable country [UK!], never had to go thro/take part in a war as did my g/father and dad & had a reasonably good upbringing apart from being sent to school too early and later a horrendous boarding school which I think has exacerbated my issues. I have been lucky always to have been in work despite my MH troubles & have retired on a good pension. I have also been able to afford a lot of therapy & had CBT sessions x 3 all of whcih have been very helpful in causing me to take a sensible 'appraisal' of myself as a person warts and all and this has substantially reduced my depressive tendencies. But the anxiety has unfort. got a lot worse ever since I had a breakdown in 2005 due to work pressures.
I feel anxious most of the time esp. in the early mornings and worry about things over which I have no control - u know the stuff - my health, my partners health, fears about loss of friends and family members and of course the grand reaper [or whateva he's called] I feel I have to spend lots of time on a daily basis doing things to manage my anxiety/panic and worry [yes!] that I don't have time enough to do straightforward enjoyable things. I feel of late that the persistent anxiety is "shutting me down" but I am having a bad patch as I write this.
To manage I take medication [A/D's] but have to say not found any of the 8 or so AD's i've taken over the years any use for anxiety but may have helped my mood. I swim every morning in my local pool [gives me good short term relief from the fluttering stomach & negative/panicky 'what if' thinking] and I've recently returned to my meditation and buddhist practise. I don't read books on anxiety any more - am fed up with them!! but do at the moment wear a rubber band on my hand which I flick when I begin 'what if' thinking. I've just been on my first holiday of 5 days with partner since my breakdown - was not too bad.
I am very grateful to have access to this site esp to those who set it up [am a 're-joined' member of several years] and admire how everyone tries to cope with their difficulties many much worse than mine. It has been of so much help as now when things are really difficult.
kind regards to all
Malcolm Furneaux