Paranoia

[mike339]

Not the most fun time atm. I have myself convinced that my girlfriend is leaving me. I have no reason to believe it other than stupid little niggles and doubts that make no sense to anyone else. I've alienated one of my closest friends and my chest hurts like crazy. I feel as I'm trapped inside my own chest if that makes any sense. Now I somehow have to pull myself together and go to work. I feel completely trapped yet I don't have any of the answers. I guess this message is a vain attempt to get some.

[mike339]

Thanks for the kind words.

My girlfriend decided to split up with me tonight. Other than her diabetes she wouldn't explain the other reasons and I'm still in shock. I've already had an attack and rang in sick for work. I don't know what happened. She said that it wasn't about my anxiety but I don't know what else it could be. I think I've actually hit rock bottom and there are surely more attacks to come.

[mike339]

I guess that paranoia I had was well founded. It would be a lot easier for me if I had an explaination as to what had happened. I never told her I was so worried about us ending but I hope it wasn't my panic disorder that ruined this.