Why has it all come back

[monochrome]

Hi i have panic disorder, was on paroxetine about 3yrs and eventually managed to come off after couple unsuccessful attempts.

Last few days have been hell, full of anxiety, no appetite, early waking. i am struggling to be at work right now and not being at all productive.
Just keep thinking what if this is it again and i wont be able to work etc.

Have exam in couple weeks which i think triggered this off....will i make it until then and will it go after?

PLease help me cope with all this panic.....dont know what to do

M

[cheekycharlie]

i am sorry to hear your going thru all this. I had a period where I am anxious free & then it came back but now I can say I feel about 99.9% better again so don't worry you can fight it away again, you did before. Best of luck with your exam. xxx

[monochrome]

thanks for your replies....my exam isnt for 11 days yet and i cant seem to revise with all this panic. should i be thinking about going back on paroxetine? im scared i wont be able to make it into work on monday and how long this will all go on for again.
M x

[kenboon]

Its all down to stress. Your stressed about work and the up coming exam. And now on top of that you are getting stressed because your anxiety levels are getting higher and your getting the symptoms you used to have.

You have to face it like you did before. Breathing exercises will help alot. And make sure you do eat something as your blood sugers will go to pot and that in turn will raise your anxiety levels.

Don't focus on it, don't give it the time of day.

Hope your feeling better soon

Ken

[monochrome]

i broke....gave in and called OOH GP and got some paroxetine....i just cant risk my job for all this again...wondering if i did the right thing now? They did work really well for me for the 3yrs i took them...i just feel like meds is giving in, plus they made me put on weight.

[wiskersonkittens]

Monochrome -- I see this so often in people's posts, and I am sure I have done it. They know what is bothering them and stressing them out, but the symptoms are just so overpowering, they lose sight of it. Yet, it is in their writing. "Just keep thinking what if this is it again and i wont be able to work etc." You "keep thinking what if . . " Oh, those "what ifs" are life stealers!!! They hinder us from getting better and can destroy whatever sanity we have left. You are standing at the crossroad and you have to choose which way this will go. I see you have decided to go back on your meds. Nothing wrong with that. If that helps you get through the hump, do it. But try and remember that what you are going through is completely generated by thoughts. Yes, thoughts. That's it. No big monster, no boody man, no grim reaper .. thoughts. As hard as they are, they can be controlled just as easily as they seem to control us. It won't happen overnight, but it can happen. I am working on it, too, right now. You are concerned about your exam. I agree that might be your trigger. Right now, with all your thinking, you are not being very productive. You are spending more time "thinking" and wasting precious energy by doing so, it is hindering you from taking the proactive route. That's what is making you so anxious. You know you aren't doing what you should be. Take back your life and try to push your thoughts aside and get to studying. Don't overwhelm yourself. You don't have to do it all at once. Just take it a little bit at a time. Baby steps. As you do, I agree with others in taking some time and indulging in some relaxation techniques. Something else I have done is I look up a joke everyday so I can start my day with a laugh. Elizabeth Taylor says, "humor is the only way to stay alive." Keep that in mind. Get a hold of yourself physically and that will help clear your mind and allow you to take more control. Everything will fall into place, but you have to be the one to make it happen. I know it is so hard. I have suffered from anxiety forever, it seems. I understand where you are. But, the power is within us to take charge, and I know you can do it. Right now, you are fighting with your thoughts. It IS a battle you can win, so don't let them win anymore! Remember, we anxiety sufferers are known to be creative, imaginative, sensitive, and very intelligent. You have so many positive things going for you -- focus on those. You've got what it takes to pass this exam and beat this. I believe in you. I look forward to knowing how things go! Hugs, Wiskers ~

[peoplelikeus]

I'm bad again these past few weeks...its the weather I think

[hollygirl]

I think it is partly the weather as peoplelikeus - says - it is so hot and muggy and airless, then also probably your exam too. I have been free of panic for weeks or months at a time but then it comes back - but it always comes back in response to a stress and it always gets worse because I make it worse in my mind by freaking out and thinking I am going to get really ill again.

Right now I am in a bad place with the panic and anxiety due to some majorly heavy exposure therapy I did at the weekend - but I chose to do it and to confront my fears so I am trying to tell myself it will be okay and I will start to feel better soon.

One thing I do know is when we are in the panic and anxiety mode it feels like it will last forever but it never does - it comes and goes. I hope you start to feel better soon.

Hugs, Holly,
x

[monochrome]

hi thanks for messages. yes the weather does not help at all - esp with trying to get some sleep.
GP gave me paroxetine and beta blockers which are helping (i really didnt want medication again but i need to get myself better as i stopped eating, talking to neone or doing anything this week which was making me worse and worse). I have accepted my GP signing me off for a week to tackle the exam and interview before trying to do my day job as well.....

Holly - what you describe about making it worse by thinking you will be very ill again is exactly what i do and is my biggest anxiety i think.

Hugs to all xx