Holidays

[Rachel424]

Does anyone else here find it impossible to go on holiday becasue of their anxiety? A few years ago I went on a short break to the east coast with my mum and sister and I had to come home after a few days becuase I was having panic attacks and couldn't sleep. Now I have a fear of holidays and wouldn't even consider going away. This makes me depressed because it feels like I have nothing to look forward to in life, and I watch family and friends go away on holiday and think why can't I just be normal and do that. I was just wondering if anyone else was in a similar situation.

[skyblue]

:flowers: yes i know exactly what you mean,i think the break will be nice,then when i get there i want to come home.

went away last weekend with hubby,only managed one night,(no sleep) i see these lovely holiday adverts and think oh id love that,i hate it when people come back as say we had a lovely relaxing break

WHATS ONE OF THEM HA HA.............:roflmao:

LOVE SKYXX:flowers:

[Kerrigan]

O.M.G I feel exactly the same, my family are going away to Tuscany for a fortnight in July along with my sister, her son Harry and her new fiance David. I don't even know how many years I have turned down the opportunity to go with them and it's become a routine to simply keep house till they return.

The last time I went on holiday with them was probably when I was 15, I'm 24 and still live with my parents now but even before then my parents would regularly go to the Lake District and I'd stay at home, my sister would usually stay at a friends house.

I've always been a daydreamer and this merrily took over while they were on holiday, in my mind (I don't know if this is too much info) I was someone else and whiled away the hours pretending to be a star who could do ANYTHING she wanted. It probably sounds sad but it was all consuming fun to me and I passed up many real life opportunities for this substitute world.

I have only just stopped daydreaming, it's been just over 2 weeks and I have more self-respect, time flies by, I'm more prepared and nothing phases me but I still won't be going to Tuscany, partly because I don't like couples (single & bitter!) and partly because holidays don't mean anything to me, they aren't fun unless it's my choice of destination with my fiance or my girlfriends but I'm single and have few friends. I was thinking about inviting my friends over while they're away but my nerves get pretty bad so I wouldn't be much of a hostess.

[skyblue]

i think a few friends over would be good,perhaps on a weekend but in the afternoon for a bit of lunch get them each to bring something,maybe say till 6ish as you have to go somewhere they dont need to no you dont,that gives you a time to focus on,if it goes well ask them to stay saying you have cancelled what you were going to do,if you feel a bit wobbly tell them you had a bad night and just a bit tierd.

hope it goes ok
love skyxx

[sb001f8994]

Holidays! I havent had a holiday for 18 years. Every year I watch my hubby browse thro brochures and book his holiday for him and my daughter. Then I iron all their clothes, pack their cases and wave them off...its agony.I worry from the minute they leave till they return two weeks later...I should just go and worry there! Im agoraphobic and wouldnt fly anyway. We have even bought a place in Turkey...which I will never see!
But I wouldnt stop my daughter seeing the world with her dad, as I didnt when he took our sons too. Its something I have to deal with but not something I look forward to.
No doubt from the 4th August I will be living in the chat room!
Best wishes,
Carol xx

[Jaco45er]

Hi Rachel

I know exactly how you feel (see thread below)

http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=35116

One thing I will say though, is even when going on a break in the UK, I stress days before and have high anx/panic for a day or 2 once away. But it does always subside.

I know it's not the most popular method of coping, but I do think exposure to what triggers you is the way forward to overcoming the anxiety.

I never thought I would fly again, and before I got on the plane last year I was mega stressed in the airport, but now, i can't wait to go abroad (next year sadly not this year).

It is stressful, it is intense and it is distressing, but the feeling of acheivment afterwards does make it worth the ordeal, and I am sure, that with more exposure, the triggers of ones anxiety will start to diminish.

TC

Jaco

[cheekycharlie]

yeah I used to get stressed before hols & be anxious when I got there but this yr is the only yr I have felt 100% better & I am due to go away this weekend for an 11day hol abroad & I can't wait! I don't have any anxiety at all about it. x

[Gregor]

The best advice i can give is to go on that holiday, get on that plane, and just do it.

I know it's not as easy as all that because i have been there.

A few years ago, i was very agoraphobic - to the point where i was housebound for one year. Then, slightly better, but still unable to do much other than lie down most of the day.

Then came the decision which changed everything. I made my choice to take that trip. This wasnt a holiday, but i needed to join my wife who was in Peru. That's a big big trip for my first time away! However, the need for going was greater than my anxiety feelings. I did everything i needed to just get myself there. I have to say, that trip was not the best in the world - i had panicky moments and i certainly needed much help a long the way. The end result, though, is that i did it and that achievement will live long in my memory.

I spent 18 months over in Peru which was amazing. I felt much better than i had in years. A few weeks ago i made the return trip home - once again alone. Again, though, i was very nervous about the trip and even thought about cancelling. However, i went through with it and this time, i took it with an incredible level of calm. I felt pretty much relaxed the whole way. I still had to ask for help when needed, but i didnt panic or anything.

I know everyone's situation is different, but the longer you dont go, the longer you wont go. It's a real shame if you're missing out on family holidays, etc. It could be good, perhaps, if you arrange a more local getaway - one that doesnt involve planes and airports, which can be quite stressful anyway.

I hope you manage to get there eventually...

[lucy0927]

Hi, I'm exactly the same, my anxiety started about 9 years ago when I was on holiday in Spain and I had an awful 2 weeks not knowing what was going on. A few years later I tried a city break to Paris but had the same situation. That was 7 years ago and I've not been away since.

Last year I managed to get down to Newbury for 2 days to see relatives and I didn't panic. In about a weeks time I've a trip to Stratford-Upon-Avon then to Newbury booked for 3 days and it's scarying me a little. The anxiety set in yesterday and I'm just trying to put it to them back of my mind and not worry about it.

I was contemplating a trip to Rome later this year (on my own as then if I'm not well I can handle it better) and when I'm not anxious I feel I can do it. However, when the anxiety feelings start I feel weak.

I've come to realise it's just taking baby steps that helps me and a little at a time and I'll get more confident.

Please realise that it's not just you and in time you may be able to go for a short break, only if it is over a few days. Until then I guess we'll all just have to daydream about being able to do it.

Lucy x