after having 5 children i feel very ill

[nessie12345]

im married with 5 lovely children in my life one recently, im 41 and i feel very poorly,after my ectopic pregnancy 5 yrsago ive been ill every day(told i couldnt have any more,i used to be a marathon runner and so very fit,ive trained hard since my 20s but now i cant do anything.i get up at 6 am every morning and i can hardly walk my lungs burn and my breathing is so bad, i dont smoke,my glands are permanently huge in my neck,i was sent to the hospital where 1 doc said i have ms but then after tests he said more like fybromyalgia.my jonts ache ive nobbles all over them i feel sick constantly and generally very poorly,my doc says stress but i think its rubbish,any help would be fabulous im losing the plot really.i dont feel i have any more stress than anyone else,ok my dads just died of asbestos cancer and my hubby in the last 15yrs isnt sympathetic(a very stong character) and 5 kids are difficult ,but we have both always worked etc and had good lives so why should i be stressed any more than anyone else,but of late all of this illness is gettin to me,i cant work now im too poorly,my hubbys on shiftwork so im left with baby boy and my daughters,some days i dont know how i get through the days,i just need some answers really,is it stress or have i got a disease,thanks for reading and any info would be brill

[sjr1969]

hi, some of your symptoms sound like fibromyalgia/m.e/cfs.Im not a doctor but i do have m.e myself and can at times get some of the symptoms that you do. i found if you type in m.e/cfs or fibromyalgia symptoms you can come up with some good websites that will inform you of the symptoms. hummingbird is a good one for m.e. i have to basically diagnose myself as the doctors just kept fobbing me off for over a year. basically there isnt anything to be done for these conditions but there are management techniques you can use. hope this helps. sarah x

[L1SA]

HI

Sorry to hear you are so poorly & have/had so much on :hugs:

Fibromyalgia does not effect joints its the muscles. Fibro is a muscularskelator disorder.

Its chronic stiffness & widespread pain 24/7 which can also cause extreme exhaustion & fatigue amoungst other symptoms.

The noduals can be muscle lumps, its were the nerves collect together & inflamme.

The glands indicates more of an ME/CFS condition but they are all very simular. ME being more fatigue & FM being more pain although you can have both as i have FM & CFS

FM can be triggered by trauma.

If you need anymore info just shout :)

[Stressed32]

I am sorry you are feeling so ill. If you just had a baby I would think your feeling bad would be more from that than from an ectopic 5 years ago. Have they checked your hormone levels? Have you had any bloodwork done? If so and everything was normal, it is stress doing it and you may not "feel" it. Some of our tolerance levels for stress are higher than others. I can hear stress pouring out of your post!! I am pasting something for you to read about stress and the physical things that happen even if you don't FEEL the stress. It helped me a great deal....it is long, but worth the read.

Before I paste that, may I ask you a question....you had an ectopic then had 5 kids? I ask for selfish reasons....and I am sorry, but I had 1 too and have not been able to concieve since even though my tubes are both open. I know you are not feeling well, but if you are up to it....can you please share your story with me?

Ok here is that info....good luck!

What basically happens is that over a period of years we employ bad anxiety management and out anxiety threshold is slowly increasing...in other words the rain barrel is filling up! Now, because this happens so gradually we are actually unaware that our anxiety threshold is increasing if we were able to transfer our anxiety level onto somebody with a normal level it will feel incredibly intense to them. So, we keep filling the barrel up and all the while our body adjusts and we just fail to realize we are on a collision course. Now, what generally happens is that we then experience a stressor (can be good or bad) and our anxiety threshold responds by increasing but today is the day that the barrel is full!! Basically, this is the point that our emotional anxiety HAS to become physical..the water is pouring over the top and it is the same with our anxiety...we think that this is all 'out of the blue' but the reality is that years and years of poor stress and anxiety management have finally told

At this point it is incredibly common for physical anxiety to manifest itself as neurological sensations. This is because we have, in effect, fatigued our central, peripheral and sympatric nervous systems and this causes a whole host of weird and wonderful neuro sensations. The problem now is that instead of thinking that we need to allow our bodies and minds time to recover we fall into the trap of literally pouring fuel on the anxiety fire and we analyze these symptoms and convince ourselves we have MS, ALS or whatever is your disease of choice...you are now in the health anxiety loop

One of the things you here time and time again is 'how can this be anxiety if I'm no longer anxious'? The thing is that even though we may have turned the tap off the barrel is still full. Another useful analogy is to think of an overweight person...years and years of a poor diet will have made them overweight, if they decide to go on a diet after a week of eating the healthiest and best food ever they are still going to be overweight...it is the same with anxiety, we fall into the trap of thinking that it is all about what we are thinking at the moment...this is our biggest mistake, once anxiety has become physical this indicates it is a chronic condition and therefore it can take us just as long to correct the problem as it took to get into the state we are at.

The sooner we stop dumping anxiety on top of anxiety is the point that recovery will slowly start but because we fail to see immediate results we doubt everything and once again employ all those old stalwarts such as over catastrophising, black or white thinking etc etc that are going to keep us locked in the loop.