Scared of giving birth....music may help any ideas?

[andie73]

Hi

I am due to give birth to my first baby in 6 weeks and am absolutely terrified. I have tokophobia(fear of labour/pregnancy), emetaphobia and hospital phobia. I am also wary of taking lots of drugs as I don't want to feel out of control.

I am looking to compile a music CD with songs that may help ease the anxiety and distract me from my anxiety, but I'm finding it hard. I'd like to find meaningful stuff about life but think whale music etc will drive me insane. I want to feel inspired to keep going and feel that what is happening is a wonderful natural process. I have thought of Police - Every breath you take, maybe some Enya, but I'm a bit stuck......so any ideas please guys????

I need all the help I can get to survive this.

[emma30982]

ibiza chillout albums are great to chillout to goodluck and congratulations!

[cath1]

I was like you quite scared to give birth and have always been wary of taking drugs because I dodn't want to feel out of control. However, to be perfectly blunt I can't imagine any amount of music will make you feel more in control during labour. After talking the situation through with many girlfriends and sympathetic doctors I decided to take as much control as I could and opt for an induction. That way I sucked up my fear of medication and had an epidural prior to the induction and after a good while of meditation and calming talk from my husband. Even so my heart raced to the point of tachycardia after I had the epidural (but only from nerves!) and after about 20 minutes I started to calm down and realise the epidural did not kill me and I could in fact still even move my legs. The Doctors allowed me to control the dosage so that I could move or not which gave me confidence that I hadn't become a paraplegic. I was then induced and had a lovely pain free birth that I felt was totally under my control. So my advice is to suck up your fear of medication and suffer for 20 minutes till you realise it hasn't killed you rather than perhaps suffer uncontrollably for any number of hours in labour. It may be a natural process, but so is pulling a tooth and nobody in their right mind would do that without pain relief. Good luck.

[andie73]

Thanks for your advice about the drugs. I'm not saying I won't take them, I'm just saying I would like to go without an epidural if I can. I want to have a water birth and you can only have gas and air if you use the pool. I have been tole by the hospital to compile a CD of music, most people do, but I'm finding hard to know what will be appropriate as I have a feeling I'll just want to throw it out of the window!!!! But if nothing else it is giving me something to think about right now when thoughts of labour are crowding in on me.

Thanks again.

[IllegallyBlond]

Hi Andie. I too was scared to give birth. Now I have two beautiful children and I wouldn't change any part of the labor/delivery process if I could. I didn't with no epidural. I did however have the drug called nubain. I don't know if you are in the US so it may be called something different. All it does is help you relax between your contractions. Just keep thinking about the beautiful little baby that you are about to have, and how you've waited 9 months to meet this baby, and when you go into labor you know it's only going to be a couple more hours until you have him/her. Believe it or not, you are going to be very calm during this process. I never once got anxious while I was in labor, and both of them were scheduled inducements, so I knew when I was going to go into labor. I wish you all the best, and as the song says, don't blink, because they grow up way to fast. Congrats!
:hugs:

[lorrainedrops]

Hi

I am due to give birth to my first baby in 6 weeks and am absolutely terrified. I have tokophobia(fear of labour/pregnancy), emetaphobia and hospital phobia. I am also wary of taking lots of drugs as I don't want to feel out of control.

I am looking to compile a music CD with songs that may help ease the anxiety and distract me from my anxiety, but I'm finding it hard. I'd like to find meaningful stuff about life but think whale music etc will drive me insane. I want to feel inspired to keep going and feel that what is happening is a wonderful natural process. I have thought of Police - Every breath you take, maybe some Enya, but I'm a bit stuck......so any ideas please guys????

I need all the help I can get to survive this.




I'm in thsame boat as you, i have p attacks and since beng pregnant have developed a fear fo hospitals and anything medical. If i feel anxious nothing would take away the feeling i would just have to ride it out. i had my first parentcraft meetng last night and on the way i felt sick, lightheaded, hot and my stomach was dodgy. Ten min into the meeting i was fine, bu get fed up with feeling like this everytime i have to go to the hospital for scans etc. I'm so scared of the pain and worry that when i have contractions i'll have a panic attack on top. Like you i have 6 weeks to go.x

[miss_moose]

Congratulations:bighug1:

Have you thought about getting a mini dvd player instead and then having some good tv series' to watch and listen to while your in labour?

I don't know if there is any shows or movies you find comforting but for me it would be Friends.

Sorry I couldn't help with the music but maybe given you something to think about xxx

[nooniegirl]

I have two children and I too have a Hospital phobia. My first child was unplanned and conceived whilst on the pill and I only found out at 6 months. I had never wanted children because of my Hospital fear. I also have a fear of medication so the idea of labour terrified me

I managed to get referred to a midwife team that advocate home birth but support women in labour at home or in hospital. I was very open about my fears and I have to say they couldn't have handled my problem better. My first daughter was born at home after a long labour but throughout they supported me and helped me to manage my fears.

I had both my partner and my best friend present who also had a great understanding of.my fear. I managed without pain relief and used homeopathy, water pool and yoga breathing. I used a hypnobirthing cd in the weeks leading up the birth and it really helped.

Good luck I'm sure you'll be fine and it will totally be worth it xx



Maybe you

[lizzieb]

I have two children and a third on the way! I have had both an epidural and completely natural birth. Out of the two I would say I prob got more out of the birth with epidural as i was able to fully relax and see the head come out ( via mirror, lol ) where as the natural birth I was so consumed with the pain that I found it all a bit much. I don't mean to put you off but rather be honest about the amount of pain. I think if you are serious about going for the natural option then to ensure you have had breathing training so you can cope with the pain effectively and think prehaps about taking someone who you find soothing with you ( this may not be your partner- i found him useless!) Also if you use natural products to help with panic - ie lavender oil - how you can include these within your birth plan .