Tearful in the mornings - fine in the evenings??!!

[tygwyn]

I've noticed a pattern starting to rear its ugly head and was just wondering if anyone else had been through this during their recovery?

My anxiety symptoms seem to be getting milder and I am sleeping quite well (still wake early though). What I'm now discovering though is that any anxiety I do have is in the morning which then leaves my emotions all over the place. I've never been much of a cryer (hubby has only ever seen me cry once or twice!) but lately every day I seem to be battling to keep myself in a good mood and to keep the tears away. A lot of this may well be down to boredom because I recently finished work ready for our move to Australia (which we're going to delay until my recovery). Normally I would battle my boredom by going shopping but I've got no flamin money now!! By the time I go to pick up my daughter from school I am feeling much happier and come bed time I'm pretty much fine and ready for a good sleep!

I have today started on SJW (only 333mg per day) which will hopefully help me level off.

So my question is - is this all part of the recovery process or am I taking steps backward??

Thanks guys!

Rach (thought I'd start posting my name too!!)

"True acceptance means 'facing and relaxing' - it is submission" (Claire Weekes)

[twiglet]

Hi ya,
when i get a panic attack i usually feel like crying me eyes out but my situation is the opposite. i feel fine in the mornings but not at night.
could'nt tell u if you're going backwards or not. but im experience the same feeling. i think only you can truly know if you're making progress.
just do your best to try and get better.
is your family supportive??

Twiglet

[tammyg]

The recovery proccess is a very long one, from what I've read. I have recently started to make progress but sometimes it feels like one step forwards and two steps back. The key is to not think of the steps back - if you follow! You have a lot going on in your life at the moment so you might just be feeling unsettled. I hope the SJW makes you feel a little better. Maybe think of something you could do to occupy yourself from first thing in the morning. That way you won't have time to be anxious and emotional - you will just be up and out! Hmm... something cheap/free that will keep you occupied... I'll let you know if I think of something!!

Tam x

[vernon]

Hi Tygwyn,
I have suffered anxiety panic and phobias for many years on and off. And I noticed the same at first (this time around) that I was full of anxiety and fear for most of the day, then It went to very anxious and full of fear in the morning which eased off as the day went on then fine at night like if the anxiety had just about gone. Then wake in the morning feeling back to square one. I still don’t feel over good in the mornings but much more bearable than it was. I am doing so much more now than I had done for years and like you I still felt real anxious in the morning so with me that was the sign of getting better as the feeling bad on waking was the last symptom to go. I still have odd bad days but that’s life for anyone I suppose. When I do get anxious or fearful now I just find something to do like paint, gardening, clean up the cupboards etc just do anything and it seems to get rid of the anxiety. But it does all take time. Take care I am sure you are showing signs of getting better as the same happened to me. Take care. Vernon

[tygwyn]

Ah thanks Vernon. You don't know how good it is to hear that (on second thoughts you probably do!).

God its a flamin struggle though isn't it?! Hubby is being absolutely fantastic - he keeps quoting things that I've read to him from Claire Weekes and I have to say 'yes I do know that, but the whole thing about suffering anxiety is that it doesn't always flamin sink in!!' LOL




"True acceptance means 'facing and relaxing' - it is submission" (Claire Weekes)

[Meg]

Its a very common pattern of recovery.

Try to go to bed having read/watched something pleasant.

Eat as soon as you get up.


Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

[vernon]

you are right Meg, Until recenty I have never ate anything at all all day untill about 4pm when we all have dinner. no breakfast nothing all day. Now i eat (only cerial) when I get up and if i feel anxious I snak which seems to help too. Tygwyn what clare weeks bok you reading? I have read them but loved the latest essential help for the nerves, Its all her books in one sort of, another thing I find helps is a little read in bed before i go to sleep. tc. Vernon

[mum2four]

Crying is a way to release tension and express feeling ect. If you have never been a big for crying maybe your body is finaly using crying to release the pent up emotions that go along with anxiety and/or maybe your finaly letting your self expess your feeling's.

I know for me anyway if I ignore the need to cry it's like presure biuld up in me I start to feel like time bomb. When I cry it like letting air out the of ballon I start to release the presure within and I'm less likly to just explode at unexpected time's.

Crying is not alway a bad sign try to see it as a good thing and if you feel it's out out control or or not reason at all then talking to Dr is the best option.

[tygwyn]

Thanks Guys

Looks like I spoke too soon about the sleeping! I had an awful night last night - must have only had about 1 hours sleep and during that time I was having some crazy dreams. My heart feels as though it has gone back to how it was right at the beginning - racing and jumpy. I'm concerned now that this is linked to the SJW that I started yesterday. I've read stories where this has happened to other people. God I don't know what to do now. I was sleeping really well and now this has really put me all about.

Fed up is not the word. I'm going back to bed and going to ask hubby to do the school run today. I need sleep and I need my Claire Weekes book with me!

"True acceptance means 'facing and relaxing' - it is submission" (Claire Weekes)

[vernon]

Hi tygwen, what u had last night was normal even when u r getting better. I am much better but do have these setbacks and its best try not to let them play on your mind that only makes you worst. I dont think it was the SJW but it was you thinking to hard about taking them? you are so scared of taking meds that you are just adding to the anxiety? You seemed to be getting better without the meds so if you are to scared about taking them you can safly stop has you have only had one dose? hope you feel better soom, Vernon.

You said in earlier post you have posponed aussie until you feel better: this only adds to anxiety panic to best try never put things off till later, beleive me putting things off only makes it much worst later.

[tygwyn]

Thanks Vernon!

At the moment I just feel as though I am taking steps backwards all the time. Yes I do feel better in the afternoons but thats only really after lots of encouragement. All I seem to do in the mornings is cry and now that I've had a bad nights sleep and very anxious today I feel as though I have made no progress. Yes I am very anxious about taking meds and you are thinking the same way as my hubby - I wasn't sure about taking them and so it created more anxiety - probably very true. I was on the verge today of phoning the doc and just asking for some different anti-depressants from last time but I soooo want to do this on my own so that I know how to deal with it if it comes back. The mornings are absolutely killing me. I'm not even sure if its the anxiety in the mornings or just the fact that I am so down and just want to cry. I suppose its just exhaustion and facing the fact that another day is starting and so to do all the emotions that run along side it. My husband told me today that he knows I can get through this because I'm the strongest woman he knows - my answer to that was "and look wheres its ****** gotten me!". Being strong after previous upsets obviously hasn't helped me now has it?! I just wish that I had cried when I needed to previously and then hopefully I wouldn't have been saddled with this s**t! Sorry to be so down. Its just so flamin exhausting isnt it!

Thanks again

"True acceptance means 'facing and relaxing' - it is submission" (Claire Weekes)