Craven
29-09-05, 21:58
Hi, I thought I’d finally introduce myself. I’ve been coming to this site for several months, but I’ve never had much to say on the main subjects: panic, anxiety and depression! I’ve had some enjoyably evenings in the chat room - jokes, wisecracks and banter - but otherwise I’ve not made much contribution.
I’ve suffered with “all of the above” on and off and to varying degrees, most of my adult life. At the moment my biggest battle is with depression. I’ve been on this current depression spiral for about 2 ½ years. This part of my life has included the break up of my longest lasting relationship, the death of my Father, the loss of a job I enjoyed (replaced by a job I loathe) and disappointment in “friends” who I thought would be supportive during this time.
I feel like a shadow of the man I was 3 years ago. I sometimes feel like I have unlearnt a lot of life’s lessons and reverted to an earlier version of myself - I don’t know if this makes any sense to anyone!
Having said all this, for several months I feel I’ve generally been moving in the right direction again, making changes and moving away from the “abyss” (the way I think of depression at it’s worst). No medical practitioners were involved apart from 5 minutes advice on the St. John’s Wort that I’ve been taking for the last 3 months. It’s difficult to tell if this medication has had any benefit in my case, I suspect it has, but the effects are very subtle compared to other medications I experienced in my mid to late twenties. Perhaps the depression has run its course and I would be feeling like this anyway.
I’m sorry I haven’t had much to say, because although I am a good listener and have a lot of personal experience, I don’t feel qualified to give advice. What’s right for me isn’t necessarily right for others - we are all different. I perhaps could benefit from some advice, but I pretty much know what I need to do to “fix me” at the moment. I also find I haven’t got much to say, because my depression has left me going through the motions of life without really having much of a life! - does the expression all bed and work mean anything to anyone!
When I’ve felt lonely and come back to an empty house it’s been nice having the company of people who’ve made me feel welcome, laughed at my jokes and helped me escape for a couple of hours. Thank you all.
……
A motto what I wrote ;) …. “Expect nowt and you wont be disappointed” …. The intonation I use varies from sincere to tongue in cheek, depending on the type of day I’ve had!
I’ve suffered with “all of the above” on and off and to varying degrees, most of my adult life. At the moment my biggest battle is with depression. I’ve been on this current depression spiral for about 2 ½ years. This part of my life has included the break up of my longest lasting relationship, the death of my Father, the loss of a job I enjoyed (replaced by a job I loathe) and disappointment in “friends” who I thought would be supportive during this time.
I feel like a shadow of the man I was 3 years ago. I sometimes feel like I have unlearnt a lot of life’s lessons and reverted to an earlier version of myself - I don’t know if this makes any sense to anyone!
Having said all this, for several months I feel I’ve generally been moving in the right direction again, making changes and moving away from the “abyss” (the way I think of depression at it’s worst). No medical practitioners were involved apart from 5 minutes advice on the St. John’s Wort that I’ve been taking for the last 3 months. It’s difficult to tell if this medication has had any benefit in my case, I suspect it has, but the effects are very subtle compared to other medications I experienced in my mid to late twenties. Perhaps the depression has run its course and I would be feeling like this anyway.
I’m sorry I haven’t had much to say, because although I am a good listener and have a lot of personal experience, I don’t feel qualified to give advice. What’s right for me isn’t necessarily right for others - we are all different. I perhaps could benefit from some advice, but I pretty much know what I need to do to “fix me” at the moment. I also find I haven’t got much to say, because my depression has left me going through the motions of life without really having much of a life! - does the expression all bed and work mean anything to anyone!
When I’ve felt lonely and come back to an empty house it’s been nice having the company of people who’ve made me feel welcome, laughed at my jokes and helped me escape for a couple of hours. Thank you all.
……
A motto what I wrote ;) …. “Expect nowt and you wont be disappointed” …. The intonation I use varies from sincere to tongue in cheek, depending on the type of day I’ve had!