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View Full Version : Obsessive tendancy's-can't change task/focus easy



mum2four
03-10-05, 03:30
While I dnt beleive that OCD is my problem I was wondering if anyone can shed some light on why I have alway's found it so hard to sift my focus even thoe I know that everything has to be in moderation and fucusing on one task at time just make's it so much harder to keep everty in check.

Ever since I can rememeber when I get strong desire to do some thing I obsesses about it. At school I couldn't handle all thr different subject when iwas doing good in one the other suffered when I focused on another subject the subject I was doing well in suffered.

When I became friends with a person I could only think about hanging and having fun with them. I'm prety sure a lot of my friend ship have bed distroyed by coming across as if I'm all or nothing person due to my inablity to remember thing's I my attenstion was not stongly focused on them. I have gotten better over time but i still struggle to find the right balence in life.

Since i was young i have alway's had a obsessive nature to know every thing about baby's and kids and I have 4 now I had my first child at barly 18y old. I have enjoyed a mother it has been my reason to keep fighting for my self which is proberly a bad reason to fight for I know i should be fighting for but that is only partly the reason. My conversation with people are dominated by talk about babys and kids which has too aften came across as if I am trying to but in to there life or there way of rasing there kids but that was never my intenstion I just cant seem to find much els to talk about. When ever i try to talk about other things with people I feel out of place and out my depth and my anxiety dosn't make anything easier.

When I get a need to know about something I that doinate's my like for a while to shake the obsession. Which too often has impacted my life is 1000 way eg i forget anything that is not related to what I need to know at the time. I get behind in house work I forget to pay bill I even have to make my self eat or drink(which is the one thing i really forget to do the most). I dont forget to do most thing's for my kids cause thay are my life but I will forget about my need's a lot.

When I focus on my budget my house work, my fun, ect the list go on suffer heap's and when I focus on another task every thing els suffer for it. I have goot better with years of learning from my mistake's but the effort that take's to keep any kinda of balence in my daily life seem to really effect my tolerance to every unplaned event that pop's in to my day.

For each unplaned event my frustration become's grater to I just feel like what's the point and i totally give up on everything. The result of which is being treated for depression twice but I never fully been gotten to point where i feel that I'm no longer at risk of becomeing depressed. I ask for help for anxiety cause my erg to self harm was getting to point that i didnt trust my self. I dont want to go back in to deep depression i just want control over my life I want that elusive calm balence to my life.

I was just wondering if any one could shed on light on my behaviour's or any tips to help get me what I want.

I have 1000's of story's about my obsessive tendancy's but Ill leave it at that.

I have a son with asperger's syndrome from everything i just wrote I and more I have thought there is small posibilty that i may have asperger's as well but what I have that wont help to find a way to find the balance I'm after. I dont know if people with OCD face the same sort of chanlenge's but I thought I post and see.

Thankyou.

in1peace
03-10-05, 04:47
Hey mum2four!
The things you are describing about yourself are just like my son's symptoms! He has Attention Deficit Disorder. He is taking Strattera right now and I am amazed at the HUGE difference I see! He forgets to eat and he even forgets to use the bathroom too. He's 9! He can be intense about things he is really interested, but he can also be totally distracted by any little thing. His teacher told me that once an announcement came over the loudspeaker at school, she'd lose his focus for the entire day! He's also highly intelligent. I suspect you are too!
With the medication, I am able to get his attention and he is actually able to get his work done at school, instead of bringing piles of it home!
I wonder if you might have ADD? It might be worth looking into!


"Honey, if ya ain't feelin' the bumps in the road, ya ain't goin' nowhere!" (A wise Georgia Granny's take on living life to the fullest! LOL!)

mum2four
03-10-05, 06:59
My son has asperger's he's 9 nearly 10y and it can often be missdiagnoised as ADD cause it can very simular with some of caracteristic's.

My son's has a very limited range of conversation topic's and thing's he's will do and enjoy with out having a tantrum or melt down. My son is very intense with his focus on his obsessive topic's. He has poor eye contact and limited abilty to express him self emotionaly but he's learning he's not spontainious about thing's he dose he alway has some sort of cue that trigger's his responce like hugging and saying goodbye ect but he has really made a lot of progress with learning better ways to do thing's. Nothing come's naturaly to him he find's it hard to use the information he know in the right way. For example he know's the road rule's but with out the cue of a set of light to cross he find's it hard to use the infomation he has to get across the road safly he is still very unpredictable near raod's he still walk's away in public he will go up to a perfect stranger and hug them( not every one like's that).

Since finding out that there is a reason for my son's odd personality(which he has a very good side to it as much as difficult side to him). I wondered about my 6y daughter and my self since she seem's to following the same behaviour pattern as me growing up. It would be nice yo understand why I am the way I am.

I first heard about ADD when I still in high school and I thought is sounded a lot like me back then. I also met a lady who had Adult ADD and she seem very much like me in many way's. I alway thought that people with ADD just cant focus at all on task for long I may be wrong about that I dont know. I can focus on things but too often for weeks or months to point of nothing seem's to be as important as getting that done but I never finish what I sart either. The when I snap out of it I'm so far behind with everything els that I just dont know where to start and finding a new thing to focus on can take me a while. The patern continues I'm busy or borred all or nothing planed or spontainious ect. Thank you for your message.

in1peace
03-10-05, 17:54
There are different forms of ADD. You can be hyper-focused on things and totally unfocused with others.
I confess I don't know much about Aspergers. I'm learning what I know from reading about your family. You are bearing the weight of the world!! Being a mom is tough enough, but having a child with special needs makes you almost a saint! ;) LOL!
((((((hugs))))))) for you!
I am so glad you are at this site!
It might be that you have a hereditary trait in your family, and it would be interesting to look into whether you and your daughter are dealing with the same thing.
If you are ever in the chat room, give me a PM. We should be chatting!


"Honey, if ya ain't feelin' the bumps in the road, ya ain't goin' nowhere!" (A wise Georgia Granny's take on living life to the fullest! LOL!)