purpleflurp
12-08-09, 03:07
Hey guys,
I'm 14 and I haven't gotten an actual panic attack, in about 2 years, but I gotten close. I freak out that I'm pregnant all the time. Oh and I'm a 100% virgin. Never had a boyfriend. I really would like one, but I freak out about pregancy so much I couldn't handle one. Even when I was 10 or so, and didn't have my period, I would freak out I was pregnant. I would obsessively pray to God, "I don't want to pregnant until I'm much, much older" or "I want my period."
When I got it when I was nearly 12, things got worse. I wouldn't let boys get near me and always worried sperm would get near my vagina. I swim competivately, and you are normally very close to boys all the time. In bathing suits! I found out clorine kills sperm, so I not as worried.
I hate sharing a bathroom. I have two brothers, 12 and 11, a dad, and a mom. I always think I'll get pregnant by toilet paper, towel, or by sitting in the shower. One time I got a vaginal rash so I had to rub it with a cream. I freaked out that the cream had sperm in it or my hands somehow did.
I always am in a constant fear cylce. Normally, 2 until weeks after my period I worry I have breast cancer or I'm lesbian. (No affence to real gays, it's my problem. There is nothing wrong with that, it's just I have a deep fear of becoming gay.) Than I obsess I have pregnancy symtoms. I always look my symptoms up, bloated feeling, peeing a lot, hurting breasts, not craving food, feeling bumps in the car, and they all point to pregnancy. I'M NOT THOUGH!!
:curse: It might just all be in my head. It's summer, and my schdules off so in early July was about 7 days late for a period a month or so ago. I FREAKED out. I cried myself to sleep and such. I eventually got it and it was normal.
2 weeks or so after that I went to Maine with my friend's family. I normally work out 5 or 6 days a week, but there I hardly did at all. I'm a health nut and all that was available there was fatty foods, lots of pasta, hamburgers, and reheated crap. I felt more and more bloated every day. I couldn't stand up straight and didn't feel like moving. In the car, I could feel all the bumps and I felt huge and think I gained a couple pounds. I would slump and my fat folds would put pressure on my pelvic area. I worried 24/7. I got back and took a while until I started feeling a little better. My pelvic area looks bigger and sticks out but I thinks its fat. My stomach sticks out more so it looks slightly pregnant, but the uterus and stomach still seem separate.
I got what seemed to be my period Friday August 7th. It was a "perfect" 28 days from my last period, which is a bit early for me. I expected it to be like my normal period. light on the first day, then heavy the next two days, then regular the fourth, not have blood on the fifth, randomly bleed again on the sixth, and be gone by the seventh. But it's been starting and stopping. Bleeding a regular amount at a steady pace, not heavy, nor light, then stopping. Then I get a nothing but a brownish discharge for up to day and it starts again for a couple to several hours. I got a little tissue on my tampon on the 10th, but other than that I haven't gotten any, and I'm worried. I haven't had any heavy bleeding! I've keep wasting tampons to see if there is any blood left. There is a brownish discharge right now. Now I think my "period" has stopped, (which if it has is a day shorter than usual) and I've gotten those weird symptoms I got in Maine all over again. I'm so p****d. SOO p****d!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I EFFING HATE THIS WORRY!!! I WANT IT TO EFFING GO AWAY!!! IM IN TEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP! HELP! HELP! HELP!!!!
xoxoxoxo
Em
This post has been automatically edited by the NMP post filter
I'm 14 and I haven't gotten an actual panic attack, in about 2 years, but I gotten close. I freak out that I'm pregnant all the time. Oh and I'm a 100% virgin. Never had a boyfriend. I really would like one, but I freak out about pregancy so much I couldn't handle one. Even when I was 10 or so, and didn't have my period, I would freak out I was pregnant. I would obsessively pray to God, "I don't want to pregnant until I'm much, much older" or "I want my period."
When I got it when I was nearly 12, things got worse. I wouldn't let boys get near me and always worried sperm would get near my vagina. I swim competivately, and you are normally very close to boys all the time. In bathing suits! I found out clorine kills sperm, so I not as worried.
I hate sharing a bathroom. I have two brothers, 12 and 11, a dad, and a mom. I always think I'll get pregnant by toilet paper, towel, or by sitting in the shower. One time I got a vaginal rash so I had to rub it with a cream. I freaked out that the cream had sperm in it or my hands somehow did.
I always am in a constant fear cylce. Normally, 2 until weeks after my period I worry I have breast cancer or I'm lesbian. (No affence to real gays, it's my problem. There is nothing wrong with that, it's just I have a deep fear of becoming gay.) Than I obsess I have pregnancy symtoms. I always look my symptoms up, bloated feeling, peeing a lot, hurting breasts, not craving food, feeling bumps in the car, and they all point to pregnancy. I'M NOT THOUGH!!
:curse: It might just all be in my head. It's summer, and my schdules off so in early July was about 7 days late for a period a month or so ago. I FREAKED out. I cried myself to sleep and such. I eventually got it and it was normal.
2 weeks or so after that I went to Maine with my friend's family. I normally work out 5 or 6 days a week, but there I hardly did at all. I'm a health nut and all that was available there was fatty foods, lots of pasta, hamburgers, and reheated crap. I felt more and more bloated every day. I couldn't stand up straight and didn't feel like moving. In the car, I could feel all the bumps and I felt huge and think I gained a couple pounds. I would slump and my fat folds would put pressure on my pelvic area. I worried 24/7. I got back and took a while until I started feeling a little better. My pelvic area looks bigger and sticks out but I thinks its fat. My stomach sticks out more so it looks slightly pregnant, but the uterus and stomach still seem separate.
I got what seemed to be my period Friday August 7th. It was a "perfect" 28 days from my last period, which is a bit early for me. I expected it to be like my normal period. light on the first day, then heavy the next two days, then regular the fourth, not have blood on the fifth, randomly bleed again on the sixth, and be gone by the seventh. But it's been starting and stopping. Bleeding a regular amount at a steady pace, not heavy, nor light, then stopping. Then I get a nothing but a brownish discharge for up to day and it starts again for a couple to several hours. I got a little tissue on my tampon on the 10th, but other than that I haven't gotten any, and I'm worried. I haven't had any heavy bleeding! I've keep wasting tampons to see if there is any blood left. There is a brownish discharge right now. Now I think my "period" has stopped, (which if it has is a day shorter than usual) and I've gotten those weird symptoms I got in Maine all over again. I'm so p****d. SOO p****d!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I EFFING HATE THIS WORRY!!! I WANT IT TO EFFING GO AWAY!!! IM IN TEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP! HELP! HELP! HELP!!!!
xoxoxoxo
Em
This post has been automatically edited by the NMP post filter